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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Music4lyfe Offline
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I don't want to be her friend - December 22nd 2013, 06:58 AM

She is the main reason I'm depressed now. She's the reason why I'm getting my anger issues back. I. Fucking. Hate. Her. She's the biggest bitch I know right now, and since she does it so often I don't have enough time (For me, usually a few days) to shake it off, and so now I'm getting my anger issues back, and I'm freaking violent. The only way I can avoid grabbing her by the hair and smacking her head into the brick walls of my bedroom, or maybe even the brick wall that blocks the view of anything else in the window of my bedroom - glass first, is if I go and punch a door or wall. My knuckles are bleeding, it wasn't that bad in the past. I used to hold back hitting a wall because I knew how much it hurts to punch brick, but now it's the only thing I can do. I tried hitting pillows, mattresses etc.. Even punching bags. Nothing else helps other than hurting her or something that will hurt me. She's one year older than me, but she treats me like I'm 5. I'm shaking, tears are wetting my face, my breathing isn't steady, my heart rate is too hard and fast. I listened to my nails breaking as I scratched the wall. We argue all the time, and one day very very soon I'm pretty sure I'm going to snap and start yelling at her, how I feel, what she's doing, everything. I want to make her cry. I want her to know what she's put me through. We are complete opposites, but she seems to refuse to go and find someone who's more like her. I don't need her, I don't need a lot of friends because at school I like to read and at home I have friends online. I feel sick. My head hurts. And we've been arguing online as I slowly type this and I just lost it. I FUCKING HATE HER. SO MUCH.
   
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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 22nd 2013, 09:11 AM

I suggest telling her how you feel. In any way you feel like doing it, just speak your heart, what you feel the most. Holding it inside and tormenting yourself will not make things better, and remember that your health is the most important. Both physical and mental.
Some people are like that, if you don't go hard on them, they won't understand...

If you have to go hard on her, do it. Sometimes that's the only way.


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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 22nd 2013, 02:18 PM

Thanks, I listened to music for hours, watched Legion of the Black, hit around a ball for a while, I feel better. But 2 of my knuckles are bruised (I don't bruise easy) and pretty sure I took at least 2 or 3 layers of skin off of every part Some parts bled, some just got skinned :I Plus I have bruises on the other side of my hand from hitting a ball in the air with them, and the joints in my fingers keep hurting My hands aren't very happy right now..
   
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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 22nd 2013, 05:52 PM

It's good you found some way to release your emotions... It's not a good one if it harms you.


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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 22nd 2013, 06:32 PM

(1) What I suggest u do is break up the friendship. Sometimes no matter how much u will get angry over her u just have to msg her online and tell her u don't want to be friends with her anymore if she is gonna treat u like that!! Tell her she treats u like you are 5, tell her she is being a bitch!!
After that just forget her. Do something u like doing.
(2) If u don't want to hurt her feelings tell her if u are going to stay friends she has be nice and stop treating u like crap. If she doesn't listen go straight to (1)!
   
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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 25th 2013, 03:54 AM

I'd like to first suggest breaking off this friendship if it is causing you that much strain. If you have to write it out first and just explain to her how certain things she does is causing you undue stress and that you feel like you need to stop being her friend for the time being.

Also, maybe the degree of stress seems warranted, but perhaps you can talk to someone about the issues that cause you to be so upset by it (even if what she's done IS terrible) that would to you being ok with causing yourself pain out of your anger (hurting your hands, breaking nails on walls etc.)... If you could get to the root of why your emotions come out so strongly in such times it'd probably be easier to shake off other peoples bad and crappy behaviour

Best of luck and merry Christmas




Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
   
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Re: I don't want to be her friend - December 25th 2013, 07:41 AM

I would definitely let go of this person if she is affecting your health. Life is too short to be miserable because of one person. You're only 13. You aren't going to remember this person in 5 years (or it will be such a distant memory). I wouldn't waste my life keeping someone around who I don't like. There are so many nice people out there.
   
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