Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!

Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
BreathingIn Offline
Junior TeenHelper
BreathingIn's Avatar
Gender: Female
Location: East coast, USA

Posts: 221
Join Date: November 7th 2014

Mom has online relationship, mood changes - September 1st 2015, 02:10 AM

My parents are still married. But my mom is having an online relationship with a total stranger on Facebook. I know because I saw it. I wasn't snooping, but she was joking with me about this guy.

She's been on Facebook since this past year. They began talking a few months ago and just within this month things are getting heated. If I go near her laptop she will jump and scream at me to get away and that it's none of my business what she's doing. I have snooped a couple times and read things that no married woman should be talking about with another man.

This man says he's from Pakistan (We're in the US). He just works at an office or something, so he says. I don't trust this at all, and maybe I sound racist, but how do I know this isn't some ISIS recruiter? She would never do something like that, I feel this person isn't to be trusted.

They talk about him getting a visa and coming to the US to live with my mom. My mom talks about leaving my dad and I to live with this man. They also talk about my mom going to Pakistan to live with him. They talk about marriage and much more.

I tried talking to her about it, that I feel it's not right she does this. She screams at me and tells me to leave her alone. Her moods have changed. She refuses to do anything for the household anymore. She won't let me drive her car, not that she ever did before, but she gets more angry about it now. She gets very angry with my dad and I about everything. She has talked to this Pakistani man about how she doesn't want to do anything for us anymore.

This is all a totally shock and it pisses me off to the max. My father and I have done NOTHING to her to make her like this. We don't have a lot of money, so maybe that's why. But she's the one who spends my dad's paycheck in one day.

I think she has mental issues and I think we should go to a family therapist. But I know that if I brought it up to her, she wouldn't go. She would insist nothing is wrong with her.

I have no money to get my own car or to move out. I work 2 part time jobs and it's still not enough for a car payment each month. There's no way I can just ditch my f'd up family.

What should I do? I don't want her talking to a foreign man online because it's extremely dangerous. She is severely naive. This man could steal her identity or ruin her laptop with a virus. Or at worst, he could be a terrorist.

  (#2 (permalink)) Old
cynefin Offline

TeenHelp Veteran
cynefin's Avatar
Age: 21
Gender: Female
Location: 1261'

Posts: 10,123
Blog Entries: 1596
Join Date: August 25th 2012

Re: Mom has online relationship, mood changes - September 2nd 2015, 08:33 PM

Even though you didn't get a good reaction, I'm glad you tried to confront your mom about this. I do think family therapy is a great idea, but unfortunately, it doesn't seem like your mom is ready or willing to help herself or your family and you won't make much progress if she isn't willing to participate. I think you should talk to your dad about the things you know. He deserves to know about the things your mom is doing and it might justify some things for your dad.

Articles & Resources Officer|Lead Moderator|Senior Newsletter Editor
The mountains are calling and I must go.

They whispered to her
you cannot withstand the storm
she whispered back
i am the storm.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
.:Bibliophile:. Offline
PM me anytime!

TeenHelp Veteran
.:Bibliophile:.'s Avatar
Gender: Just me

Posts: 17,454
Blog Entries: 1796
Join Date: January 18th 2009

Re: Mom has online relationship, mood changes - September 2nd 2015, 09:53 PM

Hey there,

It is good that you tried to talk to your mom about this. I know you didn't get the best reaction but at least you tried.

I think it is important to remember that you cannot control how your mom chooses to live her life. I know her behavior is having an impact on you but until she chooses to see it that way there isn't much you can do to change her behavior. Sometimes you just have to let people do what they want with their lives and hope for the best. It can be difficult to do but in the end it can be better for your own mental health.

Do you think you could talk to your dad about what is going on? He might be able to offer you support that you are unable to get from your mom. He also might have some insight into the situation that you don't have at this point in time.

|Lead Moderator|Newsletter Officer|
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
BreathingIn Offline
Junior TeenHelper
BreathingIn's Avatar
Gender: Female
Location: East coast, USA

Posts: 221
Join Date: November 7th 2014

Re: Mom has online relationship, mood changes - September 3rd 2015, 08:22 PM

Thanks for your replies. My dad knows all about this. My mom talks about this Pakistani man quite often and says how she loves him, how he is coming here to the US to be with her, and that they are getting married. But my dad rolls his eyes and laughs and doesn't take her seriously. He says she has obsessions with different things all the time and that it passes.

This just seems way too involved to be something that will pass. We both are getting a little concerned and want her to stop
Closed Thread


mom, mood, online, relationship

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All material copyright 1998-2020, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints | Mobile

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.