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CoolBluAly Offline
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What should I say? - May 28th 2009, 12:07 AM

So, i'm in 8thgrade and it feels like all of my friends are going to a different high school than me. I mean, i know i'll meet new people and be able to make new friends, but my problem is that i dont' know what to say to people. I'm so shy and I just don't know what to do. I will stand with my friends and I have nothing to say, its like i go completely brain dead and when I do think of something to say, the conversation doesnt last long. and i am horrible with come backs.
Plus, some of my friends that are going to the other school have started hanging out with a different croud-the manga, cartoonish crowd. No offense to anyone, but the kids like that at my school irritated me, and she's becoming one of them. I just feel so depressed and like i wnt have any friends over the summer or next year. what should i do?

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Katrina Offline
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Re: What should I say? - May 28th 2009, 11:56 PM

Hiya! Ah, what a wonderful experience to meet new people!

In my opinion, you should go into this with no negative thoughts. If you're tainting your thoughts with the idea that you're not going to meet anyone, you probably won't, you know? That's just how these things work out, it seem. However, if you have a positive outlook about this, I do believe it's going to be ten times easier for you to meet people!

Join a club. Seriously. Find something at the high school that captivates your attention, and join the club or audition for it! It's so much easier to meet people in an environment where you're comfortable and have the same interests as others around you. What's more? You're guaranteed to have a topic of conversation to fall back on, which is great if you don't feel like you're the best conversationalist in the world.

Don't worry about it just yet! You've still got your whole summer to enjoy. Take care. [:

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Strider Offline
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Re: What should I say? - May 29th 2009, 09:44 PM

Hi Aly,

I find that the best way to get a conversation going with people I don't know is to ask them lots of questions! People like talking about their personal interests and like sharing their experiences, so if you get them talking about that, then the conversation can really move forward. You can add in some things from your own life that relate to what their saying as well. Find out what they are interested in and let them know of something similar you like to do.

Not everyone has really witty comebacks or likes to talk all the time. Having someone else lead the conversation isn't a bad thing as long as you still contribute. Try to initiate the subject, and it should go well from there.

When going to a new school, it's a really good idea to look into what kinds of programs, clubs, and teams it offers. That is a great way to meet new people who share a common interest with you. There are probably volunteer opportunities at your new school as well, and that's a good way to get to know people quickly because you will all be working together at a job. It helps a lot with the community too.

Don't feel too badly that your friends are changing a bit right now. It's normal for them to want to experience new things and hang out with new people. You may not completely like the crowd, but it's not like they are forcing you into liking the same things! If you don't want to hang out with the group, then contact your friend separately outside of school to hang out. That way you can spend some time with them without hearing them jabber about manga.

Good luck!

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