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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Kumagoro Offline
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Unhappy I eat more than my friends - September 19th 2009, 10:02 PM

I would never ask my friends to change. I just can't think of what to do about this. Whenever I go for lunch with my friends, they all eat so much less than me. I don't even eat out of impulse anymore; I've got better control over that. It's just that they eat tiny lunches, and my family make big lunches and big dinners, and I don't want to worry them by not eating as much or by asking for a smaller portion. But I don't want to be the odd one out amongst my friends. I feel really insecure when they see me eating because I know it's why I'm bigger than them. My family are all thin but I don't think I inherited that factor. If I tell my parents I'll make my own lunch they'll think I'm turning anorexic. I can't change other people and I know I shouldn't change myself, even though I really really want to. I just don't know what to do to avoid the pressure.
Sorry for whining. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you x




   
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Re: I eat more than my friends - September 19th 2009, 10:55 PM

Hey there,

I don't think you are whining in the least! You don't ever need to worry about asking for help. That is what we're here for, after all, so if you need advice, don't hesitate or worry about how it might sound to people.

I understand your situation, and it does sound like there's a lot of pressure from both sides. What I think you should do is talk to your parents about your lunch. Try to be honest with them and let them know that you would like to start eating healthier. Eating a smaller portion does not make you anorexic, and that is something your parents need to realize. Maybe ask if you can go grocery shopping with them and pick out healthier options that you can put in your lunch. You could pack more fruits and veggies.

What I would like to emphasize is that you should change your lunch to eat healthy- not to make an impression on your friends or parents. Your friends and parents love you for who you are, and they should not be judging you on your lunch.

If your parents keep packing you big lunches, maybe you could make an appointment with your doctor or with a dietitian to help show your parents what a good size portion would be for you. They could give you good suggestions on healthy foods that you could pack instead.

The best thing to do about this is be honest with your parents. They shouldn't hold you back from making good, healthy decisions about what food you eat. But don't let what your friends eat affect you. They care about you, and I'm pretty sure they aren't judging you by your lunch.

Take care and keep your chin up

Nat.


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Re: I eat more than my friends - September 20th 2009, 12:30 PM

Thank you You're right, my friends aren't judging me at all, it's just indirect pressure. I'll try talking to my parents about it and hopefully won't offend them.




   
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