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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Lost_Confused Offline
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Exclamation My mom is pissing me off! - December 28th 2009, 02:09 AM

I just want to rant I guess.
She's just really starting to get on my nerves, she's always talk about the divorce and her feelings and her money problems, and she talks for hours about it, and it just bugs me because I don't want to know about this all! Even if she doesn't know if it's ok for her to talk about it or not (she even says that,) she still talks about it! And she's always putting down my sisters, and comparing me to my friends and whatnot. She even talks about how teenagers are stupid, can't do anything right, they're all irresponsible, they are so idiotic and crazy and think they're better than everyone.... And I'm like, so that's how you think I am? I'm assuming that you're also talking about me, since I'm a teenager as well. It drives me NUTS!

How can I make her shut up?
Only to do it nicely, of course....
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 28th 2009, 02:40 PM

that must suck. my mom does that too sometimes, when she has something on her mind. it's a mom's thing i supose, to vent to their children, find no solution and then feel like venting even more.
... your mom sounds like she's having a hard hard time. she's probably not upset at teenagers watsoever, she saying that about them doesnt mean she thinks you are like that. she seems to be just looking for a reason to let things out, except she's not feeling better, adn so she's going on about diffrent things. i think she's confused within herself as well.
maybe you can let her know that you wish she wouldnt say that stuff, let her know it bothers you. but i think that before you do that, it would be better if you lent her your support. if you let her know that you love her no matter what.
divorce is hard, it's draining.
i know you must be going through a lot as well, with all this happening, and maybe this can make you both closer instead of distroying you.
don't let it get you down, because trust me, before you know it, it'll pass


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The brighter the dawn.
The longer the darkness lingers,
The more beautiful the light will come.

   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 28th 2009, 03:53 PM

When she says she doesn't know whether or not she should be talking about it, say "You shouldn't. Not to me at least," and walk away. Or, you could try to strengthen your relationship with your mom and actually share your opinion with her and some of your own problems.


Don't go through life.
Grow through life.
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 28th 2009, 05:22 PM

I think your mom is reacting off some pain. Something is causing this, and since she is your mom, perhaps sitting down and spending sometime with her would be very helpful.
Spend sometime with her because it seems she is suffering on the inside.
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 28th 2009, 08:27 PM

Quote:
Spend sometime with her because it seems she is suffering on the inside.
I never know if she really does or if she's just acting to make me feel sorry for her, because she's done that quite a bit, so I don't know if I should just tell her to shut up, or to talk it out about what's wrong. I guess I don't really want to know what's wrong, but i want her to not talk to me about it...
I know, i know, i should like a bitch, but it's true.
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 29th 2009, 02:57 PM

Even if your mother is doing it just for your attention, you still have to give it to her.
she's your mother.
if it were someone else, you can tell them that they're making it up.
but her right as a mother, is that she can manupliate our hearts for some love.

and that seems to be all she's asking for.
also she hasnt done you real harm. there are mothers out there that beat their kids, and who neglect them and don't feed them.

your mom seems to care about her responsibilty, im sure she took care of you when you were a child.
and if we don't show true mercy to our mothers, who will we show it to? and these people that we might be kind to, have they done for us what our mothers have?


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The brighter the dawn.
The longer the darkness lingers,
The more beautiful the light will come.

   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 29th 2009, 06:14 PM

Quote:
im sure she took care of you when you were a child.

Yeah, sure, tell that to the me when I was younger who was being abused by her sister and that mother didn't do anything about it.
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 30th 2009, 12:09 AM

I didn't know that happened to you.
But not talking to her is also making things also unbearable for you.
   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 30th 2009, 09:36 AM

give her the benefit of your doubt?
maybe she had things.
im not saying it didnt hurt when she didnt do anything, i know for a fact that it does.
maybe you'd say i don't understand, but i'll share this with you.

my brother used to be somewhat of a bully (and an older brother) but he didnt shy away from punching me or kicking me or ever beating me up when he felt like it. he even broke my arm once. but he was a child, and that was his way, he knew no better. my mom always screamed at me, since i was younger therefore easier to control. sometimes when we fought i got a spanking from my mom, and he got off the hook.

but at the end of the day, he is my brother, and she is my mother. she carried me for nine awful long months, she went through labour, she stayed up long months with no proper sleep, she dressed me, she fed me, she cared, she sacrificed for me, she took away her happiness to make me happy. yes she went over the edge sometimes, but no one is perfect. she is human, maybe she was wrong, but deep down her heart is in the right place, and for her kids she carries only love. and if she loves him more than me, what can i do? turn my back against her, she's still my mother.

it's not fair, i agree, but it's the only thing that keeps families together, adn our hearts, both hers and ours from breaking. and maybe over time, she will learn to love me more.
i think for what mothers go through, they should be forgiven for what they've done to us. or not done.

this is what i think, u have the right to disagree, let me know what u think abt it.


The Darker the NIGHT,
The brighter the dawn.
The longer the darkness lingers,
The more beautiful the light will come.

   
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Re: My mom is pissing me off! - December 31st 2009, 04:11 PM

Hi there,

It sounds like your mom is pretty harsh to be around when she starts talking about those kinds of things, and I think it's time that you told her you just aren't comfortable hearing them. Telling her to simply 'shut up' will not solve anything and will probably just make her mad, but try explaining to her that you feel uncomfortable hearing her talk about money issues and her comparisons between you and your friends.

Sometimes people like to talk about the stereotypical teenager in unfair ways. The things your mom is saying about teenagers may not apply to you at all and she may not understand that you are making that connection right now. Try telling her that she shouldn't be judging people that way and there are plenty of teenagers who are not like she says they are.

It sounds like your mom is bringing these things up in conversation fairly often, so this might be something you will need to remind her about. Try not to get frustrated with her, but explain that you really don't want to talk about the things she is saying and that they make you feel uncomfortable. Suggest that she talk to a friend about them instead.

I hope you are able to work this out.

Nat.


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