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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 05:26 PM

Basically they argued when they were about 12/13 and he still hates her. I don't think she remembers who he is :/ or at least she has never said anything about him. The're both going to my birthday party-thing tomorrow (we're going bowling) with another friend of ours.

I text him saying she's coming and he just replied with a "" he's still coming I just don't want there to be tension.

I'm trying to think of a common ground and something they both like to talk about. The only thing I can honestly think they both like is me They don't like the same music, films, or anything.

I need them to be civil to one another I just don't know how to make that happen.


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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 06:36 PM

Talk to him about it. Say that you don't want things to be awkward, so the least he can do for you, as your friend, is be civil to her. They don't have to act like they're best friends, just be kind to each other.
I've had this happen numerous times. A lot of my friends absolutely HATE my best friend. It makes things hard, but I would suggest just talking to him about it.
I hope things go well
   
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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 07:04 PM

I've asked him to do this and he pretty much said he will just not talk to her :/ He said if she asks him something he'll answer but he won't make a effort. Blah :|


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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 09:01 PM

I dont want to insult anyone saying they are immature... but I assume your friends are about your age. So this conflict they had was 6 or so years ago... maybe more, and if they have barely spoke with each other in the meantime, I can't understand how all that tension would sustain itself.

12/13 is generally speaking a lot less mature than 19, they should get over it. I dont know how serious really this conflict was though. Maybe it was something very personal... but I cant think of any 12 year old that's said something that would offend me at 19.

Try telling him, that this is a problem that's 6/7 years old, and how long can it drag on for? Try to persuade him to at least give her a chance, and perhaps persuade her to give him a chance if she has a problem with him also. You know... sometimes people dont know an alternative unless you point it out to them with your finger, so just make it clear to them they can carry on hating each other for reasons they probably don't even remember, which is unpleasant for both, or try and move on and get over old conflicts.
   
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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 09:17 PM

I completely agree with you tbh. He's 18 (nearly 19) and she's 18. I've told him all this before but I've come to the conclusion that telling him he's wrong just makes him more convinced that he's right and just makes him dislike her more ___

Edi: He just text me with he'll me civil towards her and even buy her a drink as it's my birthday yay!


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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 20th 2010, 10:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Conspiracy. View Post
I completely agree with you tbh. He's 18 (nearly 19) and she's 18. I've told him all this before but I've come to the conclusion that telling him he's wrong just makes him more convinced that he's right and just makes him dislike her more ___

Edi: He just text me with he'll me civil towards her and even buy her a drink as it's my birthday yay!
Well that's good news then. Hope this can be a start of friendship between them, even if it won't be a deep one.

Ye... and about you telling him before. Most people don't like being reminded about something uncomfortable, especially if they are in the wrong about it... and they'd obviously try to hide it then also.
   
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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 23rd 2010, 01:54 AM

Why not just forget about it or talk it over so that it ends ? Why does he hate her so much ? Anyways just talk to him and tell him to let it go as it was a long time ago.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: My friend hates my other friend >.> - April 23rd 2010, 10:47 AM

They went together and everything went okay He even said she's nicer than he thought. He did call her "depressing" though. Thanks everyone Feel free to close this.


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