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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Name: Izzy
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Unhappy Don't know what to do - August 8th 2010, 11:30 AM

My dad has just gotten really annoyed at me. All I said was I didn't want a picture of me sent to some of my dad's family friends. My dad has known them for ages but I have never met them and I don't want them to have pictures of me. I know it sounds silly but I don't want them to.

Anyway my dad got really cross and said that he was going to stop me being able to do what I like now, like take away my computer. I have so many problems that they don't know about and the computer is my only source of comfort and I don't know what I would do without it. He also said my brother could have all these things and I couldn't have anything. It really hurts.

Things like this have happened before and I hate it so much. I don't know if this is normal or not. Do all parents do this? It hurts so much and I just feel useless around him. My brother was always the perfect one. He's really smart and nice and is never mean or negative. I try but it's sometimes too hard. I'm pretty sure I've had depression in the past and I can feel traces of it all the time which make me seem miserable and negative, I can't help it though.

I know I can be annoying sometimes, but everyone can be. I try hard to make him proud but my brother always out shines me. I said I was sorry and really meant it but he kept shouting. Now I don't know what to do and I'm scared. Please help. Is this normal? Am I just overreacting? I need help.


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Last edited by AnonymousGirl101; August 8th 2010 at 11:50 AM.
   
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Re: Don't know what to do - August 9th 2010, 09:51 PM

well your not overreacting. parents sometimes favorite the better children but im sure they dont do it on purpose so maybe u could sit down and talk to either your brother and tell him to talk to your dad or talk to your dad and tell him how he hurt your feelings because after all he is your father and im sure hell understand.
   
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Re: Don't know what to do - August 11th 2010, 01:16 AM

I can understand why you wouldn't want total "strangers" to have photos of you, but I can also understand why your father would want to send photos of you to his friends. I mean, imagine if you had a boyfriend, and your father took pictures of the two of you. Now imagine that you wanted to post those pictures on Facebook, or you wanted to show those pictures to your friends. Would you be upset if your boyfriend said you couldn't, simply because he didn't know your friends? Your father loves you, and THAT is why he wants to send photos of you to his friends. You mean something to him, and his friends mean something to him, so when you look at things from that point-of-view, it doesn't seem all that strange after all. =)

If you can find it within yourself to apologize for not seeing things from your father's point-of-view, and if you can also find it within yourself to explain why having the computer is so important to you, then perhaps your father would be willing to revoke his punishment. Try to stay calm and be accommodating while talking to your father, and chances are he will return the favor. =D

This may also be a great opportunity for you to open up to your father and tell him how you've been feeling lately. I wish I had told my parents about my mental health problems when I was your age. At the time, I thought they wouldn't believe me... or worse, they would ground me for being "difficult"... but looking back now, I realize they would have supported me and gotten me the help I needed at the time. You don't have to go through this alone, Izzy. <3 Perhaps it's worth filling your parents in on the "big picture", not just on this one little incident.






   
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