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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Helper Offline
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Lost a friend..? - December 21st 2010, 04:40 AM

I don't know what to do about my social life. I often feel like such an outcast, even amongst my friends, who I seem to alienate a lot. I guess I have a problem with 'whining.' Meaning like, I complain a lot. Though it doesn't really seem like it to me. /: But anyways, there was this guy that I used to be friends with in 10th grade-I'm now in 12th-and we got along and had fun and stuff together. Then we kind of lost contact after I got committed so many times for my depression that I had to go to an alternative school. We talked sporadically throughout 11th grade, and then this year we started talking a lot, though it was mostly me who initiated the conversations (via Facebook). And I started to notice that he seemed to be annoyed by me or something. He wouldn't blow me off or be rude or something. He talks to me like everything's chill, but there have times where he's kind of been avoid-ant in talking to me. Like for instance, for my birthday I was planning on having a party (which I didn't cause everyone bailed ) and, I had given him two weeks notice like everyone else, but he never asked if he could go. I reminded him and stuff, but every time I did, he would tell me he was going to ask and get back with me later, but he never would. Finally on my birthday he messaged me saying happy birthday and saying that he did ask but couldn't go. I know that seems legit and all, but he's been doing that kinda avoid-ant stuff like telling me "later" and stuff a lot. I've talked to him about it, and he says nothing is wrong, but I think he's withholding the truth. It makes me kind of sad, cause I really liked this guy (as a friend, I'm a guy and perfectly straight) and I wish I could change whatever it is that's makin' him not like me, but oh well I guess
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Re: Lost a friend..? - December 22nd 2010, 12:24 AM

Hmmmmm...I don't know what to say other than...this guy seems nice but like someone who needs space every now and then and probably doesn't always seem talkative either because he's not an all-out talkative person....i think he also wants to hang out with you casually but not become anything more than a good aquaintance...he might seem very distant bc he wants to be distant and i dont think its bc there's something wrong with you i just think there are aspects of you that he might not like the same way there are aspects of everyone that everyone does not like...also...VENT AWAY!!! i love hearing complaints and listening to ppl talk and whine and everything so go ahead and vent to me everyday and i will either agree and commiserate strongly or i will provide you with the sympathy you are searching for!
   
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Re: Lost a friend..? - December 22nd 2010, 01:17 AM

Sometimes human beings act this way. They don't realize that they hurt someone. They are insensitive. Sometimes they don't mean to but it hurts alot. I know what you are going through. But there isn't much you can do when you approach someone so many times and he/she rejects you.

Sometimes they respond and they are not insensitive but sometimes like this, they don't show that enthusiasm like you do. When such things happen, you can just accept it as it is and hope that they will realize what you see and feel and begin to feel the same way as you do towards them.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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