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*CatchingStars* Offline
Healing my soul
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why - June 11th 2011, 11:05 PM

so my mom called me the other day and i was stupid enough to answer i wish she just changed but she didnt she was drunk or high she just started yelling at me and telling me how i wasnt worth anything and i should die and i highly considered it but i want to prove her wrong i wont end up like her yes i did go down the path she did but i know that the path changes but her words hurt me so much coming form my mom and i dont know why i answer the phone if i know how this conversation will start and end and i hate it so much im the one to say hate is a strong word but i absoulutly hate her i try to imagine somethimes she is dead and i dont feel anything but with anyone else i cry why is it so hard to love her anymore i dont want to hate her i dont want to but she makes it so hard to forgive her and my step mom always says forgive your enimies-nothing annoys them so much but its not easy to forgive ones who hurt you so much

Life is too

Short to spend

It at war with


Iím catching stars in the sky because I am fixing the soul within me. May it be from the heart a girl broke years ago or my soul simply repairing itself as it was shattered on my walk on this earth. May the stardust fill those cracks within my soul making me brand new, but never forgetting who I once was.

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Re: why - June 13th 2011, 01:10 AM

The last time you posted about your mom, I believe I said something along the lines of, "Cease contact with her until she's ready to change for the better". I'm going to stick with that response. From now on, don't pick up the phone. Let your mom leave a voice message, then delete it (don't listen to it, because the whole point is to avoid the verbal abuse your mom is dishing out). Ask your mom to e-mail you when she's ready to be a true mother - not the woman who gave birth to you, but the woman who is supposed to love and support you throughout your life. If you begin to read an e-mail from your mom, and it's abusive in nature, delete it. I know it's tempting to keep reading, but if the first sentence is something that doesn't sit well with you, chances are your mom isn't ready to make amends. Delete the message, and don't reply to her e-mail. Wait for her to come to you, and don't take her abuse in the meantime. It's okay to feel whatever it is that you're feeling, because this isn't an easy situation to handle. Love, hate, apathy, sadness... it's all natural when someone you want to have in your life isn't treating you well.

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