Over-Bearing Mother.

[Xx.Shes.Unbroken.xX]

-I know how this works, so I know alot of people won't respond. But, I really need some advice. Cause, this is getting out of hand and I don't know how much more I can take.

--Ok, so I'm homeschooled. And, I'm home like 97.7% of the time. I'm a really great kid. I never get in trouble for the things teens usually get in trouble for and I get great grades. But, my mom always finds something to yell at me for. And, it gets really overwelming. She's absolutely impossible. She is going through menopause, and has alot of stress. But, I can't deal with it. One time, she went completely insane just because I took my shower 5 minutes later than she wanted to me to, and I was still ready before her. But, she went CRAZY. She can get violent, and really scary/intimidating. I try to talk to her calmly, and ask her nicely to calm down but all I get is "SHUT UP." and, more yelling and intimidating looks. Like really? Who tells their kid that, acts like that, and still expects them to respect them? I do everything that I am told. It can get overwelming sometimes, but I still do it. And, another thing... I can never explain how I feel to her, cause she thinks its complaining. But, I always have to listen to her and how she feels. I'm honestly gonna give up. Not care anymore. Just stop trying to please her. I just really wish she would appreciate the great daughter she has, cause she could have one a whole lot worse.

---(This is just a SUMMARY. It would take forever to explain it all in detail. :/)

[Koharuchan]

Does your father also live in this house with you? Even if he doesn't, is it possible to get help from him? Believe me when I say I know how you are feeling, my mom gets exactly the same way all the time. Because I am in pretty much the same situation as you and am wondering how to deal with it myself, I probably can't give the best advice, but I can tell you that if you want really good straightforward advice you should send this in an email to the teenhelp helplink system. The mentors there give great advice. I hope everything turns out okay!

[Xx.Shes.Unbroken.xX]

Nope. I can't get help from my dad. He's just as bad. He has alzhemers. Thats another reason why she's so stressed. :/

[Chris.]

Well I think 2 things should be done that may help you out.

First, try being super nice. Do things before she tells you, clean up things, maybe get her something, anything else you can think of, then see if her mood changes. If she is nicer than you know what to do for now on - if she isn't, then step 2

Step 2: try to stay away from her as much as possible - getting away from her will take effort but then you wont have to deal with her yelling all the time. At that point if its really getting bad then maybe start seeking help. As you said shes going through her final changes - My mom had those about 3 years back - the worst 3-4 months of my life - was a living hell. But I stayed away, and eventually she was different after about a year or so. I forced her to go to therapy at which she was given pills - which helped her alot.

I hope that one of these steps work. Its going to take alot of time - and effort; so be prepaired for the ride.


Best wishes,
Chris