TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
George^^ Offline
Hi :D
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
George^^'s Avatar
 
Name: George
Age: 21
Gender: Other
Location: Guess

Posts: 993
Blog Entries: 29
Join Date: January 20th 2012

My Friend= mean. - February 25th 2012, 01:44 PM

Okay, so I have this friend. Let's call her E. Basically, I've known her for like, forever. She's really awesome, but can be a bitch. And she never says sorry for being a bitch.

Like yesterday. I have a fear of heights. She wanted me to go down a water slide. I went up to get her to stop pestering me. I couldn't breathe, my throat closed up, and I couldn't breathe through my nose because I have a cold. I told her. And then she got to being a bitch about it. And I told her "If I was in this situation, I would understand." and she said "I'm a person that even when I don't think I'll like something, I'll try it for my friend." (YEA, you'd go down a water slide when you can't fucking breathe?) And then I told her "A real friend wouldn't do this." And I walked off. I almost cried. Later she found me and I was trying not to talk to her, but then I had to, and then she ran off. She hasn't said sorry for making me almost cry. And I know I won't get one, unless I be a bitch to her about it, which she won't understand, which will lead to a fight, before one of us says "sorry". (I know that, because I've been in similar situations a million times.)

My "friend" does this all the time. She'll say the most cruel things. Apperantly I'm the one that actually puts others into mind. I know if the situation was reversed, I would understand and I would say we can always try again later. And I'm pretty sure my "friend" will do this again today. A while ago, we made plans to go to this mall, and I have to go with her and another friend of hers. I will be a third-wheel. I'm thinking of bailing. I have an excuse that's real anyways. I have a cold.

Sorry... I tried to do it without swearing, but it's true. The word that comes to mind is bitch.


I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
That I'm OK, that I'm fine, that it's all just in my mind
But this has got the best of me, and I can't seem to sleep
It's not 'cause you're not with me, it's cause you never leave
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Spirit. Offline
Run free
I've been here a while
********
 
Spirit.'s Avatar
 
Name: Kaveri
Age: 27
Location: India

Posts: 1,422
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: January 28th 2009

Re: My Friend= mean. - February 25th 2012, 02:37 PM

Hi there George,

I have a friend just like yours. I used to get so pissed off with her, because no matter what, she'd be a bitch to me, but expect me to apologize, and everything used to be about her.

I know you probably don't want to, but talk to her and tell her that she really hurt you. It's not about fighting it out to see who has the bigger ego, it's maintaining a relationship. That takes a lot of understanding and patience. You have a lot of it, clearly, but, now, it seems to be getting to you even quicker. The solution would either be talking to her and sorting it out. And apologizing doesn't show weakness. It just shows you can step up and take control of a situation. You can either do that, or fight it out, which obviously, won't go very well.

I hope your friend understands, and I also hope that this helped.
Take care of yourself,
Kaveri.


~Through the wind and the rain she stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above.
But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she's loved.

Concrete Angel



"And so I grew from colt to stallion
As wild and as reckless as thunder over the land.
Racing with the eagle, soaring with the wind.
Flying? There were times I believed I could."




HelpLINK Mentor - 2.4.2011
LiveHelp Operator - 18.6.2011

  Send a message via MSN to Spirit. Send a message via Skype™ to Spirit. 
1 user(s) liked this post or found it helpful.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: My Friend= mean. - February 25th 2012, 08:59 PM

I'm sorry that you have a friend that you totally don't get along with - but I think everyone has atleast one of these types of friends.

I want to address a few different things here:

1) Please understand that sometimes people just don't want to say things like 'I'm sorry', or 'I love you'. I've struggled with this for a long time. I would get defensive if a girl didn't tell me she loved me - I would end a friendship over it. See, sometimes we grow up using certain terms lightly, and sometimes we grow up in an environment in which we always learned to say 'I'm sorry" or 'Thank you', or 'I love you'. We just need to understand that we are all brought up in different settings, and we all learned different things. What we see as an apparent thing to say like "I'm sorry" someone else might see that as not the right way to go about the situation; and we need to understand that, and to most importantly not over react if we don't hear what we want.

2) If she keeps doing this, and you don't want to accept it or adapt to it, then you need to find a friend that will better fit you and your personality. We all have a certain type(s) of people that we can connect/bond with, and then we also have a certain type(s) of people that we collide/argue with often. We just need to find the right friends that fit our personality and way of life.




Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
George^^ Offline
Hi :D
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
George^^'s Avatar
 
Name: George
Age: 21
Gender: Other
Location: Guess

Posts: 993
Blog Entries: 29
Join Date: January 20th 2012

Re: My Friend= mean. - February 25th 2012, 10:06 PM

Thanks, both of you. I don't think I'll try for one. We fit well, despite the whole... thing. ^^' I'm hopefully going out with her soon, because I think she might be one of those people that don't say I love you a lot, but she has said it to me. (Of course she has, my oldest memory of us was when we were 5. we're 14.)


I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a thousand fucking times
That I'm OK, that I'm fine, that it's all just in my mind
But this has got the best of me, and I can't seem to sleep
It's not 'cause you're not with me, it's cause you never leave
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
friend

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.