i am 16.5 and from north america, but originally from a different country where my parents grew up. they have totally different ideaologies and beliefs from me. how can i convince them to let me follow my beliefs and not let my life be based on what they believe anf think, considering the fact that i grew up elsewhere?
Re: Immigrant parents?? -
March 28th 2012, 02:54 AM
This is a great question and a common one, too, amongst first gen Americans. Where are you from, btw?
It takes time, and depending on how different it is here than there, it could take a while. You might need to be patient and not confront them so directly. Actually, that might be counterproductive. What might be better is for them to see that the values and ideals that make your family are still present for you, that you've internalized whatever it means to be where you're from, those unique qualities and values and things that your folks value..and presumably would like you, too. You're in luck here, b/c even though here are a lot of cultural differences between countries, the values people (and parents!) have are remarkably similar. If they can see...which means you can demonstrate..that you have accepted those and internalized those, it makes it a lot easier to talk about culture.
Also, recall that they made a choice to be here, which says something about their wiliness to accept change. If you can focus on the deeper things they truly worry about, it will make the cultural things that much less threatening.
PM me with the link of the post you'd like me to respond to.