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Education and Careers Work of any kind can get stressful at times. Ask in this forum if you need help with coursework, applications, and more.

View Poll Results: Do/Did you feel a lot of pressure from your family to perform academically?
Yes! All the time. 15 39.47%
A little, but not enough for it to be a serious problem. 16 42.11%
None. Whatever I want is fine with them. 7 18.42%
Voters: 38. You may not vote on this poll

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 08:11 PM

Bottom line: I feel a great deal of pressure from my parents to be a high achiever. They want everything about me to be comparable to the best in the world. They want me to go to a top university; they want me to get into ENA (http://www.ena.fr/); they want me to travel the world and work in foreign relations; they want me to speak French and Mandarin; they want me to be accomplished both in the arts (film and literature) and in more "solid" career objectives like economics and engineering..

I'm finding it hard enough just to keep up with my OWN goals, let alone theirs. A lot of the things they propose make sense, but they're so strong in their convictions that I have no time to drown them out and consider how their ideas would fit into my ideas. I don't know what I want, and I worry that I never will. I refuse to live out their dreams for them, but what if I'm turning down career opportunities that I could actually end up loving?

The worst part is, I don't think they even know how they're making me feel.

Anyone else ever felt like this? How do you deal with it? What did you end up choosing to do?


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 08:20 PM

Hi Laura.

My advice is - do what you wanna do.

No. My parents never gave a crap about my academic career. Especially my mom. I was an A+ student and my sister was the absolute opposite and it made no difference. Luckily - I'm a selfmotivated person. I currently have an associate degree in early childhood education and hold quite a few certificates. I'm planning to continue. All on my own.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 08:31 PM

Thank you for the reply.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spider*man(girl) View Post
My advice is - do what you wanna do.
That's the problem, though. I spent so much time being told what I should want that I have no idea what would actually make me happy.

I love to learn, and I would be going on to college regardless of their expectations. But the fact that they expect me to go to college and study certain things ("Get this degree, not that degree...Oh, you don't want to go into human rights law-- go into international law.") It gets to me. It makes me NOT want to do well in college, just so they'll get off my back about what they want me to do. That's actually why I spent two years of high school slacking off. It was just to get them to leave me alone.

No one expected huge financial success from my brother, so what he's doing now is impressing them. He doesn't have a degree, but he has a steady job, a wife, and two kids. I can see how happy he is.

They expect more from me.


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Last edited by Lorelei; July 31st 2010 at 08:44 PM.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 09:04 PM

Laura do as your sig says:
"You do what you love, and f#%* the rest." -Little Miss Sunshine

I do understand where you are coming from. My parents didn't really give me a choice when it came to schools my whole life they send me to a high school away from where I live up until university I picked it. They wanted me to go to another one which is ranked top in México but it didn't have the career I wanted I had to put up with all the whining from them and what not but at the end I'm happy in my school and with my career and now they are happy because they see me happy. Parents always want the best for their kids sometimes without realizing it they pressure us into what they think will help us in the long run I would suggest you tell them right now what you really want to do because if you continue to let them choice for you in the long run you are the one that is going to be unhappy not them. If you are still unsure on what you want to do try taking the Kuder Test or an aptitude test.
Good Luck.!


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Re: Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 10:01 PM

i wouldn't say i get pressure from my parents but they do want me to do well. my mum has these big dreams for me that i'll be a barrister or doctor or whatever but it's not going to happen. she realises that now but deep down i think she's a bit disappointed that i'm not pursuing something more academic. at the end of the day it's your life and you should stand your ground.

there is NO point going to a university that you don't want to go to, to study for a degree you don't want to do. it's not only wasting your time but making you unhappy.

i understand that parents want their kids to do well.. of course they do. but when they pressure their kids to the point where they become obsessed by grades and become waaay too competitive it's a bit much. in the past my mum always used to compare me to my friends. she'd have the 'if so and so can get an A then why can't you?!?' attitude which used to really piss me off.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - July 31st 2010, 10:20 PM

My mum gives a little pressure but overall I think she would support me in whatever I did choose to do. In all honesty, I think it's really important to do the degree/college course etc that you want to do because if your heart just isn't in it you aren't going to do that well and it would be a waste of your time/money. I think your parents may be disappointed at first but they sound like they would come round after a bit of time, after all, it's only natural for parents to want the best for you; once they see that you're happy though they should be fine. At the end of the day it's your life and you need to be happy and content with it otherwise all the effort and work you do won't be worth it.

I hope you manage to do what makes you happy


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 01:41 AM

My mom doesn't pressure me but she is a little bit disappointed that I am not graduating this year and instead I am facing several years more of undergrad college. I've been in college for awhile.
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 08:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelei View Post


That's the problem, though. I spent so much time being told what I should want that I have no idea what would actually make me happy.
I know that feeling. My parents expect me to go to university because to them it's the only option, and they told me if I didn't go I was letting them down. I'm a straight A student but that never seemed to be enough. It's really got me down, but I've eventually come to the conclusion that they cannot rule my life and it's what I want to do that matters. Sit down and think about what you love the most, and see what you can do with it.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 10:07 PM

I wonder if this will knock things into perspective for you. When I have kids I'll be pushing for them to be doctors and barristers and solicitors. I'll want them to travel and go places.

And you know why? Because my parents restricted me. I was told I was joining the British army and that was it. I had to fight them every inch to get into university.

When in university you realise the top jobs are a reserve for the rich people. 95% of medicine at my uni is composed of privately educated people. I will be doing all I can to be a doctor so I can get my kids into a good place without all the fucking shit I have had to do.

I'll be pushing them because people need to be pushed to do things.

When you get a top degree so many doors are opened for you with so much more money behind them.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 10:12 PM

My parents have always been supportive of me, and happy as long as I am happy. They're proud of me not because of what I'm doing but because I am doing what I want to do.

I do sympathise, I have friends whose parents are similar to yours and it doesn't sound like fun. I hope it works out for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dedalus View Post
I wonder if this will knock things into perspective for you. When I have kids I'll be pushing for them to be doctors and barristers and solicitors. I'll want them to travel and go places.

And you know why? Because my parents restricted me. I was told I was joining the British army and that was it. I had to fight them every inch to get into university.

When in university you realise the top jobs are a reserve for the rich people. 95% of medicine at my uni is composed of privately educated people. I will be doing all I can to be a doctor so I can get my kids into a good place without all the fucking shit I have had to do.

I'll be pushing them because people need to be pushed to do things.

When you get a top degree so many doors are opened for you with so much more money behind them.
You do realise that you will be doing exactly what your parents did to you, but replace the army with a different career. If you hated your own childhood then please reconsider before you subject your own children to the same.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 11:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by her_beautiful_mistake View Post


You do realise that you will be doing exactly what your parents did to you, but replace the army with a different career. If you hated your own childhood then please reconsider before you subject your own children to the same.
your problem is you think you know everything and are far too quick to start saying what you think and what you think has to be right.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 1st 2010, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dedalus View Post
your problem is you think you know everything and are far too quick to start saying what you think and what you think has to be right.
I don't think I know everything at all, there are so many things I know nothing about.

I do generally think my opinion is right. Is that not the very nature of an opinion? So you think that your opinions are wrong? I also know that there are other opinions apart from my own and that if everyone were to have the same opinion the world would be a very boring place... I enjoy talking with people that think differently to me.

But lets just look at your post shall we?

- You said that your parents restricted you.
- That you were told you were going into a certain career and "that was that"
- That you had to fight your way to University

And yet you will be pushing your children towards certain careers.. pushing them into University. What if they don't want this? Are they going to have to fight their way out of University? University is not for everyone, and neither should it be.

Pushing your children into University is on the same level as what your parents did to you.

It's cute that you think you know me from reading a few posts on a random internet forum, though. If I were to do the same to you I'd say you are bitter, slightly niave and socially awkward. Not sound like you? Then it goes to show, you can't presume to know what someone is like from a few posts on an internet forum .


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 2nd 2010, 01:21 AM

I definitely feel pressure from my parents to succeed academically, and I probably brought it upon myself. I did very well throughout middle and high school, and the result is that my parents continue to have very high expectations of me in college. I wouldn't say it's a bad thing, but it is annoying when my parents give me the "You got a C!" crap after tests.



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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 2nd 2010, 03:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dedalus View Post
I wonder if this will knock things into perspective for you. When I have kids I'll be pushing for them to be doctors and barristers and solicitors. I'll want them to travel and go places.

And you know why? Because my parents restricted me. I was told I was joining the British army and that was it. I had to fight them every inch to get into university.

When in university you realise the top jobs are a reserve for the rich people. 95% of medicine at my uni is composed of privately educated people. I will be doing all I can to be a doctor so I can get my kids into a good place without all the fucking shit I have had to do.

I'll be pushing them because people need to be pushed to do things.

When you get a top degree so many doors are opened for you with so much more money behind them.
I'll grant you that people do need to be pushed. But sometimes, a person will allow themselves to be pushed into a profession that will not fulfill their personal, social, or even financial goals.

I'm always going to take what my parents say into account. They both have a lot of knowledge, and I won't deny that. However, I do need to form my own opinions and make my own decisions (still with respect to their advice.)

I'm looking for balance, not "My way or the highway."

I refuse to be one of those self-proclaimed "rebels" who decide that everything their parents tell them is wrong, and everything they "feel" is right. I'm just going to do the best I can and make the best decisions I can possibly make. Right now, I don't know what my next decision will be.


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Last edited by Lorelei; August 2nd 2010 at 03:54 AM.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 2nd 2010, 04:04 AM

Both of my parents pressure me all the time to better even though i am a straight A student and received merrit/honor awards at graduation. I have my eyes on going to either Stanford or UCLA and getting a doctorate in emergency medicine and or in psychiatry. but now they are going to make do all this extra stuff, which i am not happy about cause im not going to have any extra time, being a freshman with honors/gate classes.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 2nd 2010, 04:21 PM

My parents wanted me to live out their dreams, too. When I was younger, I just dealt with it - I did as well as I could in school and just knew that college and deciding on a career was a long way in the future.

Now, I deal with it by making my goals coincide with theirs. They want me to get a good paying job - I do too. They wanted me in a science major - so I'm majoring in computer science (after all, they can't say it isn't science, and I love programming). They want me to get high grades - well my grades aren't at the top of the class, but they're high enough to keep my good car insurance rates and my scholarship. So every time they get mad at me or want me to do something, I have an argument - our goals are close enough that it seems like I'm doing what they want.

What you need right now is time to think, and you can get that by being away from them, or waiting until they're asleep so you can focus...anything that will keep them from nagging you. Just think. Do some research on what you are thinking of and what they are thinking of. Remember they only have your best interests at heart - but that doesn't mean your influence isn't important


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 2nd 2010, 04:34 PM

It's because they're parents. They love you, and they want the best for you. Sometimes they don't realize that the best thing they can do for you is let you make these decisions on your own. They want you to do the things that they wish they could have done, that they didn't get the chance to. Parents live through their children, sometimes. When their kids are happy, they're happy. Sometimes they fail to realize that just because a certain thing makes them happy doesn't mean it will make you happy too.

I think that you should talk to them. Let them know how you feel. If you don't tell them how you feel about this, you can't expect them to change. Sit down with them and tell them that you really appreciate their input on how you should live your life, but that you need space to make your own decisions for yourself and to decide what you really want.

It takes a long time to figure out what you truly want to do with your life. It's a hard decision to make, and it won't come to you overnight. Just take the time to figure out what you like to do, and what you want for yourself in the future. Once you figure out exactly how you want to live your life and what you really want out of it, you'll be able to figure out how to get it.





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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 12:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by her_beautiful_mistake View Post
I don't think I know everything at all, there are so many things I know nothing about.

I do generally think my opinion is right. Is that not the very nature of an opinion? So you think that your opinions are wrong? I also know that there are other opinions apart from my own and that if everyone were to have the same opinion the world would be a very boring place... I enjoy talking with people that think differently to me.

But lets just look at your post shall we?

- You said that your parents restricted you.
- That you were told you were going into a certain career and "that was that"
- That you had to fight your way to University

And yet you will be pushing your children towards certain careers.. pushing them into University. What if they don't want this? Are they going to have to fight their way out of University? University is not for everyone, and neither should it be.

Pushing your children into University is on the same level as what your parents did to you.

It's cute that you think you know me from reading a few posts on a random internet forum, though. If I were to do the same to you I'd say you are bitter, slightly niave and socially awkward. Not sound like you? Then it goes to show, you can't presume to know what someone is like from a few posts on an internet forum .
The condescending tone you present your information is perhaps the most irritationg thing about you. Your comprehension skills are abysmal, so lets take a look at my post shall we?

- I was restricted by my parents to one career
- I had to fight my way to university.

Now lets concern ourselves with something I have that you don't have: life experience. The trouble for most people here is that you've lived very comfortable middle-class lives. Its evident in the way people advise in the education careers forum - especially when someone asks if they should pursue their dream, viz. music, acting, art, in lieu of a degree in something they are good. Generally speaking the replies are of the wishy-washy do what your heart wants when life doesn't work that way. People here seem to have this safety net of their parents to fall back on so they can lose at things.

There are hundreds of thousands of people who don't have that. I've seen it and been on the recieving end of it. I am in university now and it is the reserve of all these people who have money. The people in the top end courses have been driven there by their parents and my first concern is that if I did not do that for my child I would be restricting them from that part of life.

Secondly university is temporary. Whereas you might demand your children to attend A levels, I will do my upmost best to get mine into a decent degree after they've done that they can do what they want so long as they have this degree to fall back on. So long as you have a degree you can do almost anything and the more demanding your degree is to get into the better chances of achieving a high standard of living conditions. I know a girl studying Law who intends to go itno journalism. Sure a BA in English Literature would do the job, but no she has a BCL in the best law school in the country and it will further her career in journalism more than a BA in EL would considering they're two-to-a-penny and not hard to get into like law. Another girl I know studied theoretical physics for 4 years and has now got a place in the graduate school to study marketing - a completely different career change. A man I know went to Oxford university studying classics. He now works for an insurance company in some high end of it - his degree has nothign to do with it, but Classics at Lincoln college did it for him and he lives a very comfortable life.

So having cleared that issue - a degree, no matter what so long as the calibre of it is high, opens many doors in life and ensures a high standard of living conditions.

Now as to whether a degree is for everyone. Perhaps it is not, but I will certainly do my best to let my children have that opportunity realised for them - so much as getting them to attend university. Siegfried Sassoon was dead-set against attending university and did eventiually drop out but his auto-biography tells a rather interesting story and regret over those actions: "One of the objects of an University education is to equip the student for the battle of life, and as you grow older you will find that people are estimated in the world by the results which they have obtained at the Varsity. It is a kind of stamp upon a man and is supposed to indicate the stuff of which he is made. With a degree you start with so much capital to the good, but if on the other hand you don't attend or having once commenced an University education you abandon it, the fact will miltate against you." Powerful words from the 1950's and considering almost half of the UK's population will soon have a university degree and 75% of Irelands school leavers enter univeristy his words ring true more now than they ever had.

Now I can foresee the arguments being brought against me of "I've had a very hard time in my life, I've been pushed down and had to work hard and I'm not from rish parents, &c., &c.," - I've heard it all before and I don't particularly care. Everyone has trials and life is a challenge in general. However, a good degree and the safety net of yourself rather that your parents will give you more opportunity to pursue your dreams.

I can also see some twisted edge being brought on about money buying you happiness. That is not the point of my topic, but money can save you from a lot of uneccessary stress and pressure. It might not buy happiness but it certainly saves ona lot of misery and pressure and it opens up opportunities for your children and your family.


Phew, I feel like I've written a novel.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 01:20 PM

My parents try not too, as long as I do my best they are happy.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 02:14 PM

My parents want me to go to university. But it's all right cause that's what I want anyway. After that, it's completely up to me what I want to study etc. They just want me to be happy and do well. Any pressure comes from myself.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 09:19 PM

Could've done without reading the personal insults and condescension, Dedalus, but I don't disagree with you.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 11:38 PM

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Its evident in the way people advise in the education careers forum - especially when someone asks if they should pursue their dream, viz. music, acting, art, in lieu of a degree in something they are good. Generally speaking the replies are of the wishy-washy do what your heart wants when life doesn't work that way. People here seem to have this safety net of their parents to fall back on so they can lose at things.
not everyone wants to pursue an academic degree. sure, i could go to university and spend 3 years of my life doing something i couldn't care less about - because
Quote:
a degree, no matter what so long as the calibre of it is high, opens many doors in life and ensures a high standard of living conditions.
which i think is a load of rubbish actually. saying a high calibre degree ensures a high standard of living conditions is naive. there are many unemployed graduates who have respectable degrees.

so long as my kids are happy and making a living for themselves i wouldn't be overly worried about what they want to pursue. you don't need a degree to be successful in life.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 3rd 2010, 11:52 PM

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not everyone wants to pursue an academic degree. sure, i could go to university and spend 3 years of my life doing something i couldn't care less about - because which i think is a load of rubbish actually. saying a high calibre degree ensures a high standard of living conditions is naive. there are many unemployed graduates who have respectable degrees.

so long as my kids are happy and making a living for themselves i wouldn't be overly worried about what they want to pursue. you don't need a degree to be successful in life.
And you're 17. What do you know about degrees? What do you know about living in the outside world?

I remember being 17 and if someone said that to me back then I'd have gone nuts, but what I've said really is true and you'll realise it. Go out and find unemployed law students, cambridge students, oxford students, those with radiotherapy degrees, pysiotherapy, and so on...you won't find them unemployed because they have got the real deal.

What you've said is easily said, but its nothing. And your point on shildren I already addressed as I did with spending 3 years ona degree.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 4th 2010, 12:01 AM

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Originally Posted by Dedalus View Post
And you're 17. What do you know about degrees? What do you know about living in the outside world?

I remember being 17 and if someone said that to me back then I'd have gone nuts, but what I've said really is true and you'll realise it. Go out and find unemployed law students, cambridge students, oxford students, those with radiotherapy degrees, pysiotherapy, and so on...you won't find them unemployed because they have got the real deal.

What you've said is easily said, but its nothing. And your point on shildren I already addressed as I did with spending 3 years ona degree.
oh yeah sorry i forgot, you know everything about life because you're 3 years older than me.

the point i was trying to make is that you don't need to go to university to be successful. getting a degree doesn't give you a pass to a successful life. not everyone wants to go to university. just because you do it doesn't mean that's the right way to go about things. why do you care so much about other peoples choices anyway?

i plan on going to drama school which i'm sure will make me a failure at life because it's not a 'high calibre degree.'

maybe you shouldn't be so narrow minded and realise that not everyone wants to follow the same path as you. i feel sorry for any children you'll have.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 4th 2010, 12:12 AM

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oh yeah sorry i forgot, you know everything about life because you're 3 years older than me.

the point i was trying to make is that you don't need to go to university to be successful. getting a degree doesn't give you a pass to a successful life. not everyone wants to go to university. just because you do it doesn't mean that's the right way to go about things. why do you care so much about other peoples choices anyway?

i plan on going to drama school which i'm sure will make me a failure at life because it's not a 'high calibre degree.'

maybe you shouldn't be so narrow minded and realise that not everyone wants to follow the same path as you. i feel sorry for any children you'll have.
I apologise for the rashness with my reply. I'm under quite a bit of pressure at the moment. This is not an excuse for my actions, but a reason.

I'm not saying 'm any smarter than you. You are probably more intelligent than I am - all I am saying is that I have more life experience than you - not 3 years as such, but having gone to university and other stuff. I hated hearing that stuff when I was younger, but it really is true and when you're away from your home it really does open your eyes a lot more.

I wouldn't oppose a drama school, but if it wasn't a high calibre univeristy/college the got into I would encourage a different degree and to join the drama club at their university. A degree is only 3/4 years, those aspirations can be carried on afterwards with the safety net of a degree afterwards...I discussed that already.

Like I said before, you probably have the safety net of your parents to fall back on. You are more financially well off than I have ever been. And the idea of following your dream is something you consider to be a real option...when in the reality of things this isn't a movie or a merry-go-round. Its a cut-throat world where you need to sharpen your blade as best and quickly as you can.

And the accusation of being narrow minded, please, my horizons stretch further than the final frontier. I can guarantee you that.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 4th 2010, 12:31 AM

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I'm not saying 'm any smarter than you. You are probably more intelligent than I am - all I am saying is that I have more life experience than you - not 3 years as such, but having gone to university and other stuff. I hated hearing that stuff when I was younger, but it really is true and when you're away from your home it really does open your eyes a lot more.

I wouldn't oppose a drama school, but if it wasn't a high calibre univeristy/college the got into I would encourage a different degree and to join the drama club at their university. A degree is only 3/4 years, those aspirations can be carried on afterwards with the safety net of a degree afterwards...I discussed that already.
you have quite a superiority complex don't you? you don't know what others have experienced in their lives - which may have involved a lot more than going to university so quit judging. i won't give you my life story but i certainly have quite a bit of life experience. but i haven't been to uni or joined the army so obviously not as much as you.. ha

trying to start a career in theatre after a 3 or 4 year unrelated degree course is easier said than done. but i'm sure you know everything about careers in theatre as well - so enlighten me.

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Originally Posted by Dedalus View Post
Like I said before, you probably have the safety net of your parents to fall back on. You are more financially well off than I have ever been. And the idea of following your dream is something you consider to be a real option...when in the reality of things this isn't a movie or a merry-go-round. Its a cut-throat world where you need to sharpen your blade as best and quickly as you can.

And the accusation of being narrow minded, please, my horizons stretch further than the final frontier. I can guarantee you that.
what's this assumption based upon?
interesting how you know so much about me, it really is. believe me i know that life isn't a fairy-tale. i don't have this deluded idea that everything will be handed to me on a plate. you make it out like you've had this hard life and everyone else is a spoiled brat who will go running to mummy and daddy the minute they get a knock back. that's not the case.


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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 4th 2010, 09:24 AM

1. There's a girl on here doing an unrelated BA degree who got a place ina theatre company.

2. A conversation about degrees and their uses is greatly enhanced with experience of university.

3. superiority complex =/= to common sense

4. "You are more financially well off than I have ever been." was intended to be in the third person perspective and I apologise. I did not mean you directly, I meant the view that is taken when people say follow your dremas, when in relaity its not the case.
   
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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 5th 2010, 09:35 PM

Parents often push their kids to achieve their potential. I understand that some parents are much worse than that though ... it's quite sad to hear them say "Oh, my son wants to go to Cambridge to study physics." Er, actually, that's what YOU want, not him.

My mum wasn't too bad. I felt a bit pushed to go to band rehearsal all the time even when i didn't feel like it, but she never made me join them. And academically, she always told me to do what I wanted, but she tried to make me chose different A levels and GCSEs, and in the end I think she was right.Though I know she wanted me to go to university. She says "a degree is a degree, no matter what it is, and it'll help you out" - similar to what someone else already said up there ^.

If anything, it was my teachers who were more pushy! I remember getting a good grade in my mock GCSE English exam, and my teacher was gutted and told me she was disappointed. I got a B and a C. :| And my trumpet teacher was the worst!! She even encouraged competitiveness between my and boyfriend back then. I never dare quit playing because I was too frightened of her!

So I think teachers can be just as bad. They need good grades from their students to make themselves and their school look good.




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Re: Parental Pressure. - August 8th 2010, 05:10 AM

I have to say that my mother (Father's not in the picture) has never cared what I did with school. That's not to say she's a bad mother or anything, but she's never known or cared what subjects I do, what grades I get, what I do with my future etc...

Then last year I dropped out of school. I'm back now after a year luckily from my own doing (had to call the school, organize everything, buy my own books etc) and my mother has never really been fussed about it.

I'm actually doing well at school, getting A's and B's, which suprised me because I've never tried before so I always thought I was kind of dumb and didn't have a future.

I really wish my mother had pushed me to do well because I wouldn't have to do an extra year, and if I hadn't have gone back to school, I'd pretty much have nothing to do with my life.

It strikes me that most middle class kids that end up going to college complain that their parents pressure them to do things while people who end up in blue collar jobs didn't have much encouragment and were never pushed to succeed. I know I'm generalizing, and I'm not saying blue collar work is bad, but your parents pushing you to do well is a good thing in my opinion.


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