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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Not_here Offline
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peterpan syndrome? :P (rant) - May 3rd 2013, 02:17 AM

Edit: I meant to put this in general, not general health I'm sorry. I'm not sure how to move it.

Hey everyone,
so maybe this should go in the why me section, so let me know if it does

A lot of people tell me I'm innocent, naturally curious, kind, compassionate and have other childlike features that they admire about me...and I guess this is the part where I get self conscious that I might lose it one day. As I get older, I feel myself becoming more adultish. Not because I want to, but I don't know maybe pressure?

I guess when I started using facebook, which was the summer from 8th grade to 9th, that part of my personality started coming out through my posts, and people got an understanding of what my sense of humor is like and get to know me more. In real life I'm usually quiet and may come across as either serious or silly. In school I'm serious and at home I'm silly.

So...I'm not sure how it started but I started becoming really worried that one day I'll become a boring adult. That I won't do the things that make me feel most alive. I already see it happening. Maybe because I don't have anyone to do this with. Sometimes it helps to be dance in the rain or build a pillow fort with a friend or go hiking in the park. But no one would do that with me. That is, no one my age, that I know. I know it's not good to assume but it's based on my observation and from what I understand they care about getting a job so they can "afford to have fun". Well, I do understand that, it's not that I don't. But my mind works a bit differently.

I read the little prince and I relate to it so much. It's one of my favorite books of all times. I also wanted to be an artist when I was younger and used to show my drawings to adults and the same thing would happen. I literally cried over that book, it was so beautiful. I just wish I could stay true to myself.

This may seem like not a big deal but it's becoming into a fear. Every thing I do I think if it's making me into an adult, if I would do it still if I wasn't an adult. I just want to be free from the fear of turning into an adult. Also I have no contact with children. So maybe that's why?

Today I read a ny times article and felt so defeated. Only an adult would do something like that! Plus it's mainstream news so it has it's baises etc. But I also had to for school. Even though I felt bad after.

I'm not sure where this is going, but I guess I don't mind the responsibility that comes with being an adult. My fear is that I'd have to sacrifice it, that my childlike self, which I believe is my truest self, would be lost since I'm becoming a typical, average adult with a job I hate, just for the money. Read the newspaper every morning, take in media without thinking. Start watching T.V., avoid going outside, losing creativity.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention...I'm paranoid about creativity too. Last year my sister was in a behavioral science program, where she conducted her own study alongside some a mentor. It had to do with group work and creativity. I was one of the participants and she measured my creativity. She said I scored the highest possible and she was very impressed. I was given lines and I had to draw a picture out of it. According to her it was unique and different from what everyone else drew. I'm so so afraid I'm losing creativity. I'm not sure why. I think it's anytime I find out something good about myself I get fearful and paranoid.

I guess my question here is, how can I preserve my creativity and inner child without getting so stressed out about it? Even the getting stressed out part sounds adultish to me, though I have a tendency to worry a LOT since I was a child.

Edit: I meant to put this in general, not general health I'm sorry. I'm not sure how to move it.

Last edited by Not_here; May 3rd 2013 at 02:36 AM.
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Re: peterpan syndrome? :P (rant) - May 5th 2013, 03:57 PM

Well, I'd say spend time on the things you love. Don't toss aside the things you cherish in order to do more 'adultlike' things. You can be an "adult" and still be a kid. Honestly, everyone defines for themselves what being an adult is. As long as you keep doing what you want to do, and don't let others define what being an adult looks like. If you need people to do things with, go out and join a hiking group, or another group that does what you love. If you're gay friendly check out your local lgbt youth group, they are generally 13-24 and should have regular activities doing all sorts of stuff. And if they don't, you could make new friends there to go do stuff with on your own

Me? I'm 16, but I consider myself an adult. My parents don't take care of me, I take care of me. I've figured out how I'm getting my food and the roof over my head. But along with that I'm still doing the things I want. Playing video games, drawing, writing, and spending lots of time outside.

tl;dr You define what being an adult means. You define how to live your life. There is no law that says you can't both be a kid and an adult.
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Re: peterpan syndrome? :P (rant) - May 5th 2013, 04:14 PM

Fox is right.

I mean, I AM an adult. I have some adult responsibilities like paying my rent on time, finding a job, etc.

However, I joined a club that still does things like manhunt, capture the flag, hide and seek. We still act like kids. After an event one night I got a group of like, 7 people to play duck duck goose. We organized a big pillow fight. You just have to find the right people.

And you may be surprised how many people want to do "kid things" but just don't want to admit it, especially at our age.

"We all have battle scars, Finn. Suck it up and build a brace for yours."
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Re: peterpan syndrome? :P (rant) - May 5th 2013, 04:39 PM

I've had fears about this, at various times. More than anything the feeling that time is running out. Every day I wake up, I'm one day closer to the day I'll eventually die. The day my grandparents will eventually die. The day my parents will eventually die. As I get older, people will have real expectations of me, and there will be real consequences to my actions, and that's terrifying. But, that doesn't mean that "getting older" and "growing up" are the same thing. You can easily, still live a "fun" and whimsical life as an adult, you don't really need to lose your sense of adventure.

- Justin

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Trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it,
Charge it, point it, zoom it, press it,
Snap it, work it, quick, erase it,
Write it, cut it, paste it, save it,
Load it, check it, quick, rewrite it"
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Re: peterpan syndrome? :P (rant) - May 5th 2013, 11:54 PM

thank you all of you. You gave me some great insight. Sometimes it's better to see another person's perspective on things I did look for hiking or another clubs in the past but it cost money to join a membership...I'll be looking again, hopefully I'll find one.
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