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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 01:47 PM

Im a little cofused how to ask this but this is basically what im trying to ask (yes i am explaining my situation)

On TH i express everything and am able to ask anything without a worry of people mocking my troubles or not getting atleast a bit of help, if any of my mates were to ever find my TH account all my secrets and problems would be exposed and it would probably ruin my life.

So to sum up who on here has the same kind of thing? you know if any of there real mates or family found there TH would there life be over






   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 01:59 PM

This was the same for me a few years ago, and is one of the reasons why so very few people in my 'real life' actually know about TeenHelp after all this time. However, with the big crash at Christmas anything I put on here in the last ~five years was wiped out (and despite me having to rebuild a whole site, I admit to being somewhat relieved on this front). Since then I have been fairly careful not to put too much on here that I wouldn't want others to see. My suggestion would be to either a) not put anything personal on TeenHelp at all or b) register an account that is not clearly identifiable as being you. I chose route a, but for most people I'd suggest route b would probably be best. I think at the moment your details are rather non-descript in the sense that there are probably hundreds of people in the UK who match them, so as long as you don't put in a photo, list the city you live, or list your MSN/AIM/etc details publicly you should probably be alright. The other possibility is that you only use Staff areas of the site to share your personal problems, i.e. HelpLINK and Live Help, whose logs are not visible to Google or anyone else for that matter.

Last edited by Rob; August 15th 2009 at 03:03 PM.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 02:15 PM

Yer im on route "b" so im ok'ish apart from if my mates went through all my posts and related alot of what i say like how i always wanted my name to be "Robin" Even though its not, then they could link it to me, but i dont think it would be easy.

This is just a question to people not an issue =)






   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 04:32 PM

I'm not sure. I don't tend to use the public forums to ask for help, I use Live Help primarily, so I wouldn't be worried about people looking at my problems as they wouldn't be able to find any. I guess that it would be pretty awkward at first if my friends found my account and all the posts that i've made, but I doubt that it'd ruin my life. It would probably be awkward for about a week then I doubt that it'd be a massive issue after that though i'd be paranoid that people would be 'stalking' me.
I know that TH is a great place and it's nothing to be embarrassed about if you think about it, so I don't think it'd bother me that much.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 04:44 PM

It wouldn't ruin my life, but it'd be.. awkward, I guess. But I don't really have anything to worry about. None of my friends are big internet users, my parents haven't a clue how to use a computer, and I always delete my history and LiveHelp software from my computer before I let my brother go on when he's home from college, which is rarely. So yeah, I think I'm safe. I have started to get a lot more conscious of what I post out in the open, just in case anybody did by some chance find me.
   
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 04:47 PM

I had to delete my account before over something similar.


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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 04:51 PM

i would not say that it would ruin my life, but it would definately cause some sparks. people would know everything that was underneath my smile. it would be awkward at first, because most people in my life say i am always happy and smiling. sometimes i really am happy, but even when i am dying inside- physically, emotionally, or mentally- i still smile and i really don't complain. i just never want people to see me as a weak person. but, it may be a relief at the same time. people would finally be able to know that what they do to me at times really hurts me.


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 04:56 PM

Definitely, people at school would find even more things to pick at me about. I barely deal with what they do to me now, I think it could throw me over the edge . Plus I think my folks might be a little peed off because they think they have a happy daughter.


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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 05:18 PM

My sister already found that I've been on here, and of course proclaimed it to the world, just being who she is. But, it wouldn't ruin my life if someone read what I've posted on here, although it would be rather humiliating and hard to deal with.





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  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 06:13 PM

I had two thoughts when I first read this:
1. My mom saw it, and I convinced her I only go on once a year to vent for a sec and leave (total lies... lol.) If anyone really found out about this... or read all of the conversations I've had with people on here, my life would be 100% different. I can't imagine what it would be like.... all I know is that it would be different.

2. My second thought was that if anything were to go wrong with people finding out... I'd come to TH to get help lol.


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  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 06:24 PM

It'd suck. i wouldn't be able to protect people from all my crap =(


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  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 08:03 PM

Hell yeah it would suck man, people think I'm "strong" - when really, I'm already broken and it's just a front. That's why I have a username that can't be tied directly to me, nor does anyone know of this site. If they found out every fear and insecurity inside - they'd definitely send me to a shrink or something - and, I don't trust those guys... at all. Plus, my past was really dark, so thank god those posts I admitted it got deleted.

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  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 09:02 PM

When I first came on here, I kept it secret from EVERYONE. I didn't anyone to know that I was on a site for people who struggled with very difficult things, I didn't want them to know my feelings or my struggles, I didn't want them to read the very dark poetry I wrote. I didnt want them to think that I was a fuck up.
My mom did find out and told me not to go on it because she thought people were corrupting me but later she was just like whatever.
Now everyone basically in my life knows. I am very open about it, my brother and his wife knows. She thinks its great. My friends know and they are fine with it. They are happy that I have a support system to go to.
My mom is even taking me fifty miles from my house to meet a couple of people from here and she knows they are from TH. I told everyone I knew, even the ones that weren't aware of my TH membership when I made staff. At first they thought I had a staff infection but I explained to them what I meant and they where happy for me.


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  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 09:05 PM

I don't even let anyone know i use it tbh cos my mum would just worry that i had an issue etcc.. and my friends could tell it was me if they read my posts.... my god id be screwed!!


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  (#15 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 09:16 PM

I havent told anyone.
Im worried my family would think im pathetic.
I like having to vent my worries without anyone knowing who i am in real life.
However i can get very paranoid in general and im paranoid of anyone finding my posts. It wouldnt change my life much if people knew i went on here but it would not help with the paranoia and i would certainly feel humiliated.
   
  (#16 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 09:24 PM

I think I'm in the same boat as Rob. I had a lot about myself on here before the crash, but after that, I chose not to talk about my personal life too much.
I don't think that it would ruin my life if other people I knew read my old posts, I would just rather avoid the awkwardness it would cause. I'm very much a different person than I was then, and I like starting with a clean slate.


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  (#17 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 09:51 PM

I think that if my family found out about TH, they would flip, like some have mentioned, they would realize that they don't have a happy daughter. That is my mask.
If my friends found out, well I think a certain few would take me seriously and give me the "i'll be here if you ever want to talk" deal.
I think that it would be very awkward for me in my family more than my friends, but i'm not so sure that it would ruin my life, it would just make things quite difficult for me.
   
  (#18 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 15th 2009, 10:03 PM

My parents know I use this site, but they don't know why I'm on here. I've casually told a few friends, one of them knows about it, the other doesn't.

But if people at school somehow connected my account to me, I'd probably have a ruined life. I'd be called a pervert day in and day out, and probably lose most of my friends




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  (#19 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 01:07 AM

I really doubt people there I live would ever find out. Everyone speaks spanish and almost all of my friends use the internet in spanish except for maybe facebook. But if they did find out I wouldn't worry I have picture of me and them here so no big deal they would probably just be like cool, and make an account and never use it.


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  (#20 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 03:12 AM

I've had this problem. One of my friends knew I came on here, and figured Grizabella must be my account. She messaged me without preamble freaking out asking if I was considering having an abortion...it was great.


Not around so much now that school's started

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  (#21 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 04:10 AM

I don't know if it'd "ruin" my life, but it might awkwardify things for me a bit...



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  (#22 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 04:36 AM

my friends found me but it was because i ran away and so they went into chat asking so its understandable
   
  (#23 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 04:47 AM

It wouldn't really affect me, to be honest.


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  (#24 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 04:50 AM

I haven't announced to my friends that I use TH regularly, but if they were to find out, I doubt it would ruin my life. I like it here, and thats all that matters.




   
  (#25 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 05:38 AM

Sometimes I wish a certian person would find me on here, just so they can see some things, that I couldn't tell them. I doubt that would ever happen, but if it did it might change my life for the better.


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  (#26 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 08:50 AM

It wouldn't bother or effect me. I have problems but so does everyone else so I don't mind if someone I know sees them and maybe even comments. My family/friends know I use Teenhelp as well so it's not like I hide it either.
   
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 11:02 AM

I have a whole TH life that I keep completely seperate from my real life: part of the reason why I don't want anyone here to know my name. I became open about my regular self-harm and also my questionable sexuality on here long before i EVER admitted it to anyone in real life.

I live in fear of someone I know coming on here and reading my posts, my journal entries. For some reason it's grand to admit things to thousands of strangers but if anyone I knew found out any of this, it would be terrible. I know I always complain that there's not many Irish people on here, but really I'm ok with that, because it means there's less chance of a friend joining this site. Even though i don't post my real name, they'd figure it out pretty quickly i think especially from the pictures!! And the upside down question marks I use.

I'm perfectly happykeeping TH and my real life completely seperate, thankyou very much.

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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 08:44 PM

No-one knows I come on TeenHelp and I'd like to keep like that.
If people found out things, it wouldnt ruin my life as such, it just makes things a bit more awkward...
Before the site crash, I wrote a bit more personal stuff now I am little bit more cautious. I dont know why thats just how I felt.
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  (#29 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 10:26 PM

People would find out a little more about me, but barely anything. I share with only a few select people, and they know I'm on here. As for sharing on TH... I just don't. So no, people finding out would not bother me.


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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 10:33 PM

i wouldn't care if anyone went through my account.. nothing on here people probably don't already know about me anyway.


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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 16th 2009, 11:05 PM

I'm among the group of people who have little or nothing to worry about, after the reset. Even before then, TH wasn't exactly one of my best kept secrets. But these days it wouldn't matter who found me on TH.



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  (#32 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 17th 2009, 01:47 PM

It wouldn't ruin my life, but I think that it would cause issues. My mom doesn't know about some of the stuff Ive posted, she doesn't even know I have a TH account.
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 17th 2009, 01:58 PM

If any friends came on here they'd know who I was even without reading posts, I have a pretty distinctive name. I joined before under my middle name, but I didn't like using it when I was trying to be honest about everything else
Anyway I don't think it would ruin my life. Most stuff I have said about people in my life on here, I have said to their faces anyway, or would do. It might upset people that I'ev spoken to others about it though I guess.


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  (#34 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 17th 2009, 02:08 PM

Honestly, a lot of people know I use TH, but I really have little to worry about. I rarely post about me on the forums, I rather use my blog and the handfuls of people who know me well, to talk to. What I do post on the forums is so vague, that people off of TH would have no idea about it.

Besides people are okay with me using TH, they won't bother looking for me here, especially since they think I just help others now.


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  (#35 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 17th 2009, 05:11 PM

It played a part in ruining a relationship I had. My ex boyfriend came on here to try to 'support' me, but ended up reading my really really private stuff. After that I lost trust in him.
I like knowing that people dont know who I am really, even though it's pretty clear that it's me, not many people know that I'm on here. And I trust the really close people to not come one here anyways, most of them do know quite a bit about me.
   
  (#36 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 17th 2009, 05:21 PM

my life would change ALOT! cause my family doesnt know im pansexual so yah nor do they know about my sexual life


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  (#37 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 18th 2009, 12:23 AM

It wouldn't ruin my life per se. It would just make it more complicated because everyone in my 'family' thinks I am over the 'teenage cutting thing' and the 'depression'. So if they were to come on here and read my blog or something they would realize that I was still messed up. But, I doubt they would lose sleep over it so it wouldn't ruin my life or anything like that.

All that would really happen is I would get the whole 'do you realize how sad it makes us feel when you do this?' My parents tend to make everything about them. Which I understand but if you knew them you would understand why that whole speech makes me angry....


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Last edited by .:Bibliophile:.; June 18th 2009 at 12:25 AM. Reason: my comp was stupid and messed up....
   
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 18th 2009, 12:54 AM

Yes, it would ruin my life. Most of the really bad stuff was lost in the crash though.



   
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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 18th 2009, 01:07 AM

My life would end if anyone found ANYthing I do on the internet. It would be horrible. And like you I tell everything on TH without fear. Thats what makes the site so helpful.


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Re: Would TH Ruin your life? - June 18th 2009, 07:50 PM

Omg I was just about to post a thread about this! But I'm pretty much the same way. I think now I'm gonna change some info and stuff...



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