how to get over insecurity

[pursuit-of-happiness]

i have been put down a lot in the past and its really taken a toll on me as a person today to the extreme that i am a perfectionist in all i do and worry about relationships with people all the time...please help
i want to be happy and feel secure and i thought i needed a guy to do this but i dont have that anymore

[Heartlines.]

Sometimes it takes going to counseling, and working through these issues in order to actually overcome them. I know how hard it is to talk to a counselor. I've been there. But these things take effort and work. Rome wasn't built in a day. Maybe you can try and find a guidance counselor at school to talk to. Or maybe even talk to your parents about getting you counseling. Insecurity can be overcame by yourself, but a counselor makes it that much easier. They can help give tips and tools to strengthen your self esteem.

I have a good thing for you to try. For every insecurity you have, turn it into a positive thing.
For example:

"I'm insecure about my split ends show, but my hair is really long, and thick."
"I'm insecure about my body weight, but I have hips and boobs."
"I'm insecure about the me being quiet, but I'm loud with people I know best."

I want you to try and find a counter argument for each insecurity. It'd really help your self esteem.

Another thing you can do is list everything you like about yourself. Focus on those things, rather then what you're insecure about. What you portray is what people see the most/best. Also realizing that everyone has insecurities would be beneficial. We all have something we don't like about ourselves. But all we can do is try to change our view point on it, chance whatever it is itself, or accept it.

Hope this helped.
Take care<3

[Peppermint Tea.♥]

Talking to a counselor or a parent might help because sometimes talking things through with people can put them into perspective and help us worry less about them.

Try looking in the mirror each morning and telling yourself one good thing about what you can see. Or stick little notes around your room saying nice things. Or even better, get someone else to do that for you, like a friend or family member.