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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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*Jen* Offline
keep smiling :-)
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Name: Jen
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I can't do this - January 9th 2009, 01:38 PM

I am so fed up with life at the moment. Depression just seems to be getting worse. I can't think straight or do anything my head just feels so messed up and like it is going to explode. Arghh I don't know anymore what to do. I bought tablets today because I was upset and just feel like ending it all. Self harm is getting worse and I keep thinking one extra cut won't make a difference because it really doesn't. I deserve this pain. I feel alone with all of this and nothing seems to be helping. I just want to give up.
   
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Re: I can't do this - January 9th 2009, 04:04 PM

Hey Jen,
You don't deserve this pain. You are not alone. There are so many people who feel the same way as you do. Have you tried talking to anyone about how you've been feeling? Depression and SH can be easier to deal with if you have someone to support you. Getting help isn't easy, but you deserve it. You deserve help, and happiness. If you've got no one to go to if you're feeling suicidal, try and distract yourself, or call a help line. Try to avoid telling yourself you deserve this, because you really don't.
   
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*Jen* Offline
keep smiling :-)
Outside, huh?
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Name: Jen
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Re: I can't do this - January 9th 2009, 05:07 PM

Thank you, for your reply. I have tried it all. I see a psychologist. I saw her today and it upset me, because we were talking about painful things. It's been years and things just don't seem to be changing. I can't help but think I deserve the pain. It just feels like I do.
   
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Re: I can't do this - January 10th 2009, 11:05 AM

Can you tell your psychologist when you talk about things that make you upset? When that happens to me, I let her know and we end on a good note (like talking about a random movie I've seen or something). I know that doesn't solve all of your problems, but it can just help you feel better about the psychologist. Also: are you on any medications? You don't have to answer if it feels too personal, but if you are and they aren't working, you could try asking for a higher dosage.

Just wait it out, Jen. You WILL feel better. Try to put yourself in situations that do make you feel better, like hanging out with friends, or watching a fun movie. Even if it seems like you're faking happiness, maybe you'll get used to the feeling and it'll turn into real happiness.

Love, Calla
   
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