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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 01:58 PM

Okay, this is a bizzaire story. and its real. lol


There is this drunk carpenter who decided to go to his bathtub. and he used his saw to cut cabinets. Not electic saw... And he cut his penis off with a saw.

Have anyone cut wood before??? it doesnt go thru quickly!

I dunno how and why would he cut it all off.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ukne...drunk-DIY.html
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 02:19 PM

"This was an unfortunate accident but these things happen all the time to people in his profession."

I love that quote, it makes it sound like carpenters all over the world are accidently cutting their penises off.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 02:36 PM

Oooh...He musta' been drunk. After you'd sawed like a couple of times across wouldn't you link the pain, even if you were drunk? What an idiot ...first carpenter i've known to cut off his penis.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 03:02 PM

Kill Bill style effects, too? Blood spurting from chopped off limbs?

Highly amusing.


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 04:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack View Post
"This was an unfortunate accident but these things happen all the time to people in his profession."

I love that quote, it makes it sound like carpenters all over the world are accidently cutting their penises off.
I know, I haven't heard of any other carpenters (or anyone else for that matter) sawing off their penis! I would hardly say it happens all the time that quote made me laugh so much


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 04:49 PM

O, gosh....how drunk to you have to be before you don't realise you're cutting off your penis?

...Haha xD


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 07:41 PM

LOL how?!?!?! I took woodworking in grade 9 and handsaws are very inefficient. Also, why was he sawing naked?


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 08:17 PM

This made me cross my legs. And I'm not even a man. Ouch!




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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 08:27 PM

Ouch ouch ouch. I feel for him. :|


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  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 09:09 PM

I agree, how drunk do you have to be before you don't realise that? It must have hurt so much, you think you'd have realised half way through what you were doing.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 09:30 PM

Not an electric saw?! Ouch! I wonder what his thoughts were when he realized that he sawed off his penis.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 09:40 PM

That's good they were able to reattach it. Though I don't understand how he could have the wherewithal to phone the ambulance, yet not have it to stop himself from cutting his penis off.


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 10:56 PM

GOD. What a tard! How drunk can ya be to saw your own winky off?! -_-


... He was cutting "wood" alright....

Hahaha.


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 5th 2009, 11:17 PM

Did he have nerve damage in that area not to realize?


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 6th 2009, 08:12 PM

... Just. Wow.

xD



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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 6th 2009, 08:48 PM

oh dear. thats pretty funny but eeeek sounds painful.


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 6th 2009, 09:03 PM

That is horrible.



   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 7th 2009, 12:07 AM

He must have been too drunk to feel anything...


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 7th 2009, 12:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by dreambound View Post
GOD. What a tard! How drunk can ya be to saw your own winky off?! -_-


... He was cutting "wood" alright....

Hahaha.

just what I wanted to say!


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 7th 2009, 04:00 AM

LOL, I love the quote saying that this sort of stuff happens all the time to people in his profession. It makes it seem as though it's no big deal:
[Carpenter] AHHH, my wood is sawed off!
[Doctor] Holy shit!!!!
[Mother] Oh not again... . OK, let's get it fixed for the 10th time this year.
[Carpenter] *sigh*... you're right... . OK doc, I'll go to the O.R., I know my way there.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 7th 2009, 02:01 PM

I'd hate to be the doctor who sewed it back on...

I got one better. I heard this on the radio awhile ago... Anyway, a man gets drunk and decides to have oral sex with a raccoon... The raccoon, traumatized by the rape incident, bites the man's penis off...
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 9th 2009, 01:50 AM

That is just... gross. I want to know how he didn't realize it.


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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 10th 2009, 01:06 PM

Some M-F transexuals get so desperate they remove their penises but if he isn't transexual then he would have to be really drunk or doing some kind of intense drug like LSD.
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 19th 2009, 04:57 PM

Eww! Painful, and bloody! :P He must've been off his head!
   
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Re: British man, sawed off his own penis... cries for help! - July 19th 2009, 05:24 PM

The link didn't work for me!
Does anyone else think this sounds like something sxephil would talk about on his show?


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