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Unhappy DAD FOUND OUT I HAD SEX - February 13th 2018, 02:53 AM

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]Recently my dad found out I was having sex with my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I lost our virginities with each other about 6 months ago but yesterday my dad found out about it. I am his first child and I believe he is very upset with me. I've been trying to maintain everything as normal but he won't talk to me, or just nodd when I tell him something.

I feel hopeless, I love my dad and the treatment he is giving me breaks my heart. My mom has been trying to stand by my side but since she lives in a different city it isn't helping a lot. I don't know what I should do to return to the old relationship I had with my dad, I just want things to go back to normal.[/size][/color][/font]

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Re: DAD FOUND OUT I HAD SEX - February 13th 2018, 06:13 PM

Hey there,

Welcome to the site! I hope we are able to help support you.

I am sorry to hear that your dad has responded in this manner. I imagine that is difficult to deal with. I think there are a lot of parents who struggle with the concept of their children having sex. I think that it can be a bit more difficult if they feel their child is too young or not ready etc. While I understand that this might be difficult for him I hope that he will end up coming around. I think it might be a good idea to give him a bit of time to adjust to what he has learned. After he has been given time to adjust he might talk to you about what he has learned and discuss some of the feelings/concerns he might have. It is possible that he won't come to you to discuss things after he has been given time to adjust. If that ends up happening it might be a good idea for you to try and talk to him about it. There are plenty of ways you can go about doing this. You could write him a letter and leave it somewhere that he can see it or send an email as some people communicate through email a bit more than others. You can also consider talking to him about it face to face. If you take that route it might be best to wait until you know he is not stressed out and is relaxed because this can prevent the discussion from becoming confrontational.

With all that being said, I do think that eventually your dad will adjust to this. He might decide that he doesn't want to talk about what he has learned and he might go about ignoring it. I have a few high school friends who had experiences like that. I have also had some old friend's whose parents took time to adjust to learning that their child was having sex but they became a bit more open about it for a number of reasons. I can't tell you how long it will take for your dad to learn to adjust and what his response will end up being but my hope is that with time he will end up having a more positive reaction.

Best regards.

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