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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 5th 2012, 02:35 AM

Okay so my current boyfriend is a pain in the ass... He likes me too much, and is obsessed with me. He bascially treats me like any important trophy in pro sports... I've liked one of my close guy friends for a while, and have always wanted to go out with gonna i want to ask him out Friday, but thats super soon! If I break up with my current bf, wrll if I try to, hell put up a fight. I don't wanna hurt him, but i wanna be with who I feel likr I belong with...
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 5th 2012, 02:52 AM

In regards to breaking up with your boyfriend, just be very clear that you're ending the relationship, you don't want to give it a "second chance," there's nothing he can say or do to convince you otherwise, etc. and ask for a "clean" break-up. If he refuses, tell him that you will block him on your phone, Facebook, etc. and won't maintain contact with him in any way whatsoever if he cannot respect your wishes. If he becomes stalker-ish, inform your parents, teachers, school administrators, and if it gets REALLY bad, contact the police and file a restraining order against him. Break-ups can be complicated, but not if you're willing to draw the line and ensure there will be consequences if he crosses it.

Now, regarding your friend... I know you've liked him for a while and all that jazz, but could it be that you like him a little more than before because you're comparing him to your current boyfriend? I mean, plenty of guys would look GREAT compared to your current boyfriend. How can you be sure that your feelings would be the same if you were single, or happily dating someone else? My advice is to tell your friend how you feel, but tell him that you want to wait a few weeks in order to ensure this won't turn into a "rebound" relationship. Again, I'm not denying that you have feelings for him, and that they're genuine feelings - I'm just saying that you may be finding the idea of dating him more appealing because your current relationship is so unappealing. Allow things to calm down after the break-up, re-consider the idea of dating your friend, THEN make a move once you are sure it's what you really want. =)





   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 5th 2012, 04:19 AM

I almost don't want to answer this, cause your answer said everything that needed to be said. -_- I don't want to just repeat what you said, but I agree with that.
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 5th 2012, 06:05 AM

You're 13 there isn't a need for the boyfriend.Just go and be a kid.
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 5th 2012, 08:04 PM

@tehpervyone

You're supposed to help, not try and tell me im not old enough to have a boyfriend... -.-
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 6th 2012, 01:52 AM

I'm 14 so don't think I'm a 18+ year old trying to force my point.

But there really isn't a real reason to 'date' someone at this age.

Like I said,go and be a kid as being in a relationship at this age is pointless.
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 6th 2012, 06:09 PM

Thanks for the "advice", but if 2 people love eachother, and are mature enough to have a relationship, I don't see the wrong in it.
   
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Re: How do I break up with my obsessive boyfriend?? - June 6th 2012, 06:35 PM

There's no "wrong" in it, but I kind of agree. At 17, I can see that when I was thirteen, I didn't know what I wanted in a relationship and I regret the relationships that I got myself into. They're not deep regrets, they just kind of make me feel like I settled for less than what I was worth. I mean, if you want to have a few casual relationships, there's not a lot of harm but it's easy to get tangled up with the wrong guys when you're young so just be careful.

And, yeah, you need to end things in a very decisive way with this guy. Don't make him think there's any wiggle room or hope for some other time. And I would wait a respectable two weeks before asking the other guy out; you could explain the situation to him, and just make sure he understand that you're interested but you don't want to be extremely rude to your then-ex.
   
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