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ALittleLost Offline
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I helped him cheat - November 21st 2011, 10:05 PM

I made out with my best friend's boyfriend today.
So, two questions.
1. Am i a really bad person?
2. How do i tell her? I don't wanna lie or not tell her, but idk how to approach it.


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 21st 2011, 10:19 PM

1) Yes.
2) Tell her in person, and make up some bullshit like you weren't thinking straight or weren't sure what was going on. Unless you're sure that the boyfriend was the one who initiated the action. Then you can just throw him under the bus and your friend will still be bffs with you.

ps. I don't understand the point of your first question. A person that helps her bestfriend's boyfriend cheat with them would not be categorized as a good person based on that alone. So my answer is based on this context and it's based on my opinion of the matter, not my opinion of you since I don't know any more about you.

Last edited by Chair; November 21st 2011 at 10:48 PM.
   
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 21st 2011, 10:25 PM

Anything that happens from now on is your own doing, reap what you sow.
   
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 21st 2011, 10:45 PM

Honestly, it's both of your faults, but technically you're not to blame for the cheating, he is.
   
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 21st 2011, 11:57 PM

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Originally Posted by Boobies View Post
Honestly, it's both of your faults, but technically you're not to blame for the cheating, he is.
I disagree. She was aware he was taken by another woman, let alone the fact this woman was her best friend. That makes her just as guilty.


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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 01:43 AM

I don’t see it making you a bad person. It does however make you a bad friend. And if you want to keep your friendship then I think you need to tell her. Because if she finds out about it and you didn’t tell her, she most likely will not forgive you. But if you explain it to her, you might have a chance of her appreciating you coming to her about it. Either way, it’s not an easy situation, next time it might be better to just not make out with your best friends boyfriend.



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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 05:02 AM

Bad person? No. Everyone makes mistakes. Bad friend? Definitely. You knew he was dating your best friend, so why would you make out with him? You basically are going to let a boy ruin your friendship. Your both at fault here. I'm not putting more blame on the other. It's 50/50 for the both of you.

Since you helped him do the cheating, it's definitely your place to tell her. She has the right to know what kind of friend she has, and what kind of boy she's with. It's not fair for her to have either of you in her life, since you don't care about what she's going to feel.











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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 10:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PlayingPretend View Post


I disagree. She was aware he was taken by another woman, let alone the fact this woman was her best friend. That makes her just as guilty.
How does it make her just as guilty? Once you enter relationship it is YOUR responsibility to make sure you don't cheat, a relationship is between two people. It is NOT the friends of your partners job to ensure you don't cheat, sure it's not the best thing to do, but in the end the friendship description doesn't include 'nannying around friends partner'.
   
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 11:25 AM

I think that you're both at fault here. Yes, he should have known better than to cheat on his girlfriend but you should known better than to kiss your best friends boyfriend and you need to tell her and the best way to do that is to just come out and say it. Tell her that you want to talk and tell her what happened, she deserves to know considering it's her boyfriend that has cheated on her, with her best friend of all people.
   
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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 03:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Boobies View Post


How does it make her just as guilty? Once you enter relationship it is YOUR responsibility to make sure you don't cheat, a relationship is between two people. It is NOT the friends of your partners job to ensure you don't cheat, sure it's not the best thing to do, but in the end the friendship description doesn't include 'nannying around friends partner'.
She made out with her best friends boyfriend while she knew they were still dating. Her fault, as well as his.











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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 05:00 PM

My friend tried to kiss my boyfriend once. I kicked her ass. Hard.

Let her know. Not in person, but let her know. Then expect not to be friends anymore. Sometimes there are consequences that aren't so fun out here in the real world.



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Re: I helped him cheat - November 22nd 2011, 08:41 PM

I told her, and she was upset but she was glad i told her myself.
She was madder at him than me, but she's already pretty much forgiven both of us.
Thanks for all the advice!


"Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise"
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"All these thoughts locked inside, now you're the the first to know"
-"It ends tonight" All-American Rejects

"You built up a world of magic, because you're real life is tragic"
-"Brick by Boring Brick" Paramore
   
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