Damaged goods?

[Itsboxman]

Okay, so I'm not really looking for a solution or much from this, I just want to get my feelings out there instead of keeping them to myself.
So, last night I felt lonely again, and blah blah blah. The same old song and dance. I wanted a relationship, and mainly someone to cuddle with. Somehow I was reminded of my last relationship. Reminded how bad she treated me. Reminded how I had to beg her to get back into my car after she walked out for no good reason, twice. Reminded about how expendable she made me feel. Needless to say, it made me feel pretty down. Around the time the break up happened, I was pretty sure I was depressed. Over the holidays, I got through my little depression. Now, I don't have any intentions of getting back with her, nor do I have any feelings "left over" for her. I just don't see how she could have treated me like that. I even told her that she made me feel expendable, and that she didn't care much for me unless I was doing something for her. She just got mad at me for telling her "she didn't care about me," which was exactly how I felt. She wasn't using me though, but if she was, she was doing it wrong. But I digress...
So, I guess my main point is that I hope I'm not "damaged" from this. I hope I'm not going to be hindered in my next relationship (whenever that may be...) because of her. I've considered talking to her, for some reason, about it, but decided not to because I have no other reservations or anything else I need to say to her. I wouldn't even know what to say about it.
Anyways, like I said, I really only wrote this to get how I felt out rather than keep it bottled up inside like I normally did...

[Katrina]

Originally Posted by Itsboxman

Anyways, like I said, I really only wrote this to get how I felt out rather than keep it bottled up inside like I normally did...

Ya know, I think that's a perfectly good reason, and even though I know you weren't necessarily looking for responses, I had to stop by and throw in my thoughts, 'cause I definitely hear where you're coming from.

You know what I think, though? With the kind of world we live in (and I know this sounds like its about to be straight up cliche, but bear with me), I don't think there's a single person out there - literally...not a single one - who's made it to twenty-years-old without being "damaged" in some way or another. Pessimistic, right? And I consider myself generally pretty optimistic! But isn't that kind of what adolescence is? Going through some really awesome things, of course, but also going through some tough things. If we didn't, we wouldn't learn what we know. And I think having those experiences and learning from them is as important, or MORE important than every time we've fallen down and been bruised...or however you want to look at it.

I think the really great thing, though, is when two different people from two totally different backgrounds and walks of life, who experienced different things--good things and bad things--are willing to see past the bad ones and meet in the middle with the good ones and form a healthful relationship from there. Given, I don't know if I believe in "perfect matches," but I believe if people are compatible enough to be able to work past all of their differences and the things they don't see eye to eye on, then they've done pretty darn good.

At any rate, I hear you. Good luck.

[Chris.]

Its always good to let things out - and to be honest in most cases when we get hurt from the actions of others we most often remember it. And when it comes to relationships its sometimes alot worse. When you are in your next relationship - if the past relationship(s) start to affect the current one, the best thing to do is seek help and maybe go talk to a counselor (so that your current relationship doesn't get hurt).




Best wishes,
Chris

[Itsboxman]

Thanks guys. It was actually pretty nice getting some responses, at least not some of the more predictable responses I could have gotten from my friends. So you know what, respond please. Similar situations, comforting words/stories, etc. I'd like to hear!