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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Cullen Offline
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Girls proposing? - February 16th 2012, 09:12 PM

Guys, how would you feel if your girlfriend proposed to you?

Would you feel like it was taking your masculinity away? Would you feel like you've been cheated out of a huge milestone or a right of passage in your life?

What do you think???


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 16th 2012, 09:23 PM

Although I'm young, I would have no problem with a girl proposing during a serious relationship.

Sure, I would feel like alittle of my man hood would have been taken away, but untimely I would be happy that we are moving forward and I wouldn't focus on how nontraditional the proposal went.


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 16th 2012, 10:08 PM

Personally, it's all about personal preference. I know my boyfriend wouldn't care either way!











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Re: Girls proposing? - February 16th 2012, 10:45 PM

I don't think my boyfriend would care, but personally I'd never pop the question. That's his job.

The guy gets down on one knee, the girl's brain just farts for a few seconds, and then it's all tears and mushiness and I love yous. That's how my proposal would probably happen.


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 16th 2012, 11:17 PM

I've never really thought of it that way, I've always pictured being the one to prose. I'd probably be shocked more so then upset.
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 17th 2012, 02:43 AM

Yeah like others have said, it be more of a surprise than shock or taking away any masculinity. Its always been how the guy proposes!


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 17th 2012, 06:19 AM

Well I don't think any guy I end up with may care, but personally I think I'd like it better if the guy proposed
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 17th 2012, 06:23 AM

NOO!!
I'm a guy, and I want to be the one proposing. I think it's more fun like that. This is a milestone to me too. I tell the boys I'm going to propose to her and then I go home and my girlfriend just proposes... I won't ever be able to propose again, and I've always thought about what my proposal would be like....
But..... I won't reject or anything if I truly intended to marry her.
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 07:19 AM

in my perspective it kinda would because its the men's objective to propose to their gf to become their wife. but girls have done it as well. it can be done by either gender.
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 08:04 AM

I do have a female friend that proposed and it was right for their relationship. So there are success stories, for sure. But I'm also certain that there are men out there that wouldn't take it too kindly. Are you considering it? It probably comes down to your guy.
From a female perspective, I'm not sure I would go for it.. like most women socialized in North America, it's such a norm for the guys to propose. Thinking about it though, it sounds kind of fun in the right relationship!
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 02:17 PM

I strongly disagree with a woman proposing. It's the man's job. I feel like it's saying it's okay for women to take the role of a man's job which shouldn't be the case in this case.





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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 02:43 PM

I feel that we're in a world now where it isn't always up to the man to make the first move, to ask you out, etc. so why should it be down to the man propose? I don't see why it would be a problem for the woman to propose.
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 02:51 PM

I'd prefer if I was proposed to, just because it would mean he had been thinking like I had, but if he took too long or something I would, and I doubt he'd mind xD in the end your still getting married.


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 07:13 PM

I often wonder this!
I'm the kind of girl who would most certainly prefer to propose to a man, rather than have it be the other way around.. I don't know, that's just me.
If I want something, I go for it. I may be young as well, but the thought of waiting around for years for a guy to 'finally propose!' once I've found that guy, bores me to death. If I want to marry a man, he would know.




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Re: Girls proposing? - February 20th 2012, 10:14 PM

If he was ready to be engaged, he would have purposed to you already. I'm pretty sure that he's not sitting around waiting for you to do it. If he hasn't purposed yet, there's a reason for that, so I don't think it's a good idea for the girl to do it. I almost feel like it's saying "You're not purposing fast enough, so I'm going to do it instead".

I just feel like that's the guy's job. I know that my boyfriend would be disturbed if I were to purpose to him. Honestly, he'd probably think it was a joke and laugh. And once he realized I was serious, I honestly think he would say no- because like I said, if he was ready to be engaged, he would have purposed to me already.
   
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Re: Girls proposing? - February 22nd 2012, 12:28 AM

I know my boyfriend wouldn't care, but he'd be surprised. I'd prefer if a guy proposed to me though, rather than vice versa.


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 22nd 2012, 09:23 PM

I guess for me, I think girls are stereotypically the ones who are thinking about marriage during long term relationships, and guys are the ones who arent ... (obvs not 100% true, but, ya know, I watch TV couples and shiz ...) and unless the couple openly talks about it, I'd be too scared to pop the question in case I was like "i want to marry you and I've been thinking about it for ages" and he was like "Uh, lol?"




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Re: Girls proposing? - February 22nd 2012, 09:57 PM

I actually have kind of proposed to a guy before. I asked my current boyfriend to marry a while ago and he said yes. Of course we aren't formally engaged, but that was me conveying to him that I knew I wanted to spend my life with him.

There is no ring, and no wedding in sight or anything, and I think I want him to do the actual formal popping of the question, but we both confirmed that day we want forever together, and so far it's looking that way.

To answer your question, no, my boyfriend didn't mind. I asked him something he was already feeling, and it didn't really matter who said it first.


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Re: Girls proposing? - February 23rd 2012, 05:19 PM

Oh, well I would talk to my boyfriend about marriage and the future to make sure we are on the same page, but I wouldn't actually ask him to marry me. I feel like that's his job.
   
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