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TeenHelp Veteran
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Ennui. Offline

Living the dream.

Visitor Messages

Showing Visitor Messages 1 to 10 of 9559
  1. NeuroBeautiful
    Yesterday 11:28 PM - permalink
    NeuroBeautiful
    Hey Dez, sure!
  2. Astro04
    March 3rd 2024 08:37 PM - permalink
    Astro04
    Thank youuu
  3. Wͦaͦtͦeͦrͦ Sͦpͦrͦiͦtͦeͦ
    February 26th 2024 10:25 PM - permalink
    Wͦaͦtͦeͦrͦ Sͦpͦrͦiͦtͦeͦ
    Thank you Dez!
  4. Arabesque- golfing girl.
    February 22nd 2024 09:02 PM - permalink
    Arabesque- golfing girl.
    Sending you lot of to help you to feel better.
  5. SilentBunny
    February 12th 2024 01:02 PM - permalink
    SilentBunny
    Hey thanks for the birthday wishes
  6. This_is_the_greatest_plan
    February 5th 2024 08:32 AM - permalink
    This_is_the_greatest_plan
    Yeah sure! Ill look out for your message!
  7. This_is_the_greatest_plan
    February 4th 2024 04:10 PM - permalink
    This_is_the_greatest_plan
    Its nice settling in, yeah!
  8. This_is_the_greatest_plan
    February 4th 2024 09:06 AM - permalink
    This_is_the_greatest_plan
    Hi Ennui, thanks for the weocome! I came to your profile to say hi and send you a friend request!
  9. NeuroBeautiful
    January 11th 2024 06:58 PM - permalink
    NeuroBeautiful
    Hey Dez, I saw your post and I hope that this new diagnosis helps you understand yourself better. I am in a bit of a crisis in my personal life and I'm having a hard time tending to things and also I recognize you may be able to benefit from my perspective and want to try to write a reply asap. You' are loved and deserve to get resources and I want to help however I can
  10. Arabesque- golfing girl.
    December 27th 2023 01:15 PM - permalink
    Arabesque- golfing girl.
    Sending you

About Me

  • Basics
    Name
    Dez
    Gender
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    Pronouns
    She/They
    Location
    Connecticut, USA
    Country
    United States
  • About
    About me
    Hey all! My name is Dez, and I am a 27 year old who just graduated with my Masters in Public Health. So I basically just entered the "real world" and have to be an "adult." Ew.

    On any given day if I'm not here you'll find me napping, sitting in therapy, or watching something on Netflix. I'm trying to do this thing called "finding a hobby," so feel free to pass along your favorite books and TV shows.

    I have an interest in sexual health, especially contraceptives, the prevention of sexually transmitted infections as well as HPV and the vaccine in particular. I stand with Planned Parenthood and similar reproductive health organizations. I also have an interest in vaccines.

    I'm still basically trying to figure everything out myself, but feel free to say hello. If I don't answer right away, rest assured that I will when I get a chance! :D

    ----

    I became a LiveHelp Operator on December 1, 2011. On January 29, 2012 I changed primaries to HelpLINK Mentor. On April 23, 2012 I became a Self Expression Forum Mod. On October 8, 2012 I became an LGBT+ Forum Mod. On December 1, 2012 I became a Chat Moderator. On February 9, 2013 I became a HelpLINK Moderator. On July 13, 2013 I became a member of the Performance Committee. On August 17 2013, I became an Albums Moderator as well as a member of the Articles Team. On October 13, 2013, I became a Self Harm Forum Mod. On November 16, 2013, I became a member of the Social Networking Team. On December 23, 2013, I became a Social Groups Moderator. On December 23, 2013, I also became a member of the Videos Team. On January 25, 2014, I became a Blogs Moderator. On April 12th, 2014, I became a Project Advisor. On August 31, 2014 I became a member of the newly formed Volunteering Committee. On March 27, 2015 I became a Newsletter Editor. On August 1, 2015 I became part of the Disputes Committee. On August 17, 2015 I became a Forums and Community Officer. On April 30, 2022 I became a Community Team Leader.
    --

    Last updated 11/19/23
  • Details
    Here for
    Like to help and be helped
    Relationship status
    What's that?
    Sexuality
    I'm here, I'm Queer
    Ethnicity
    Caucasian/White
    Education
    Master’s in Public Health
    Occupation
    Unemployed
    Politics
    Democrat.
    Religion
    Atheist
    Zodiac sign
    Gemini
  • Interests
    Hobbies
    I don't know anymore.
    Music
    Oh, various things.
    Movies
    The Day After Tomorrow, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Horton Hears a Who, Repo! The Genetic Opera, The Little Mermaid, Finding Nemo, Finding Dory... I don't watch many movies.
    Television
    House M.D., In Plain Sight, Nurse Jackie, Rizzoli & Isles, Hell's Kitchen, Once Upon A Time, Necessary Roughness, Chicago Fire, Justice League, Scrubs, Rick and Morty, Bojack Horseman, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Good Doctor, The Good Place, The Resident, 9-1-1
    Games
    Portal, Portal 2, The Sims 3 and 4, Plague, Rocket League, Golf With Your Friends, Magicka, then your classic board games.
    Books
    Anything that's by Jodi Picoult or talks about real life issues or Ellen Hopkins. Fiction books that talk about real world issues, like self harm.
    Sports
    I don't like sports.
    Heroes
    My Pepere (grandfather) and my cousin Sophia, as well as her two older sisters Alex and Gabby and their mother, Kristy. Also my niece Madison. :)
    Favorite quotes
    The world is round, so the place that may seem like the end, may also be only the beginning.
    Other interests
    Being a mermaid.
    Sleeping.
    Eating my sister's food.
    Zumba.
    Sloths.
    Guinea pigs.
    Sexual health and reproductive rights
    Vaccines
  • Signature
    Do you ever get a little bit tired of life
    Like you're not really happy but you don't wanna die
    Like you're hanging by a thread but you gotta survive
    'Cause you gotta survive

Statistics

Total Posts
Visitor Messages
Blog - Rantings of a Mermaid Princess
Projects
Helpful Postings
  • Ennui.'s posts have been liked or marked as helpful 3808 times.
General Information
  • Join Date: November 16th 2010
  • Referrals: 8

Friends

Showing Friends 1 to 10 of 118

Experience

Experience
Experience
  • Points: 171,936
  • Level: 59
  • Points: 171,936, Level: 59 Points: 171,936, Level: 59 Points: 171,936, Level: 59
  • Level up: 16%
  • Points needed: 5,014
  • Level up: 16% - 5,014 Points needed Level up: 16% Level up: 16% - 5,014 Points needed
Points for user
  • Points for User: 27,879
  • Per day: 9,744
  • Socialgroups: 770
  • Friends: 354
  • Visitormessages: 15,486
  • Albumpictures: 435
  • Referrals: 800
  • Filled profile: 290
Points for threads
  • Points for threads: 38,860
  • Threads: 13,910
  • Social Group Discussions: 310
  • Tags: 2,669
  • Votes: 40
  • Replies: 1,478
  • Views: 20,453
Points for posts
  • Points for Posts: 86,519
  • Posts: 47,882
  • Social Group Messages: 415
  • Attachments: 142
  • Average Posts per Day: 4.91
  • Helpful Answers: 38,080
Points for miscellaneous
  • Points for Misc: 18,679
  • vBulletin Blog: 2,569
  • Calendar Events: 110
  • Custom: 16,000

Blog

View Ennui.'s BlogRecent Entries
Latest Blog Entry

Posted March 8th 2024 at 02:56 AM by Ennui. Comments 2
Posted in Uncategorized
I feel like shit.

I'm not feeling any better. I'm going to PHP/IOP every single day but it's all stuff I've heard from being there so many times and it's just not helping and nothing is helping and I don't feel any better.

I want to die still. I have a potential date range picked out if things go as planned, but maybe I'll feel better before then and I'll change my mind. There's always a chance, right? The visiting nurse took my suicide method away from me but I ordered...

Posted February 26th 2024 at 09:35 PM by Ennui. Comments 1
Posted in Uncategorized
2/15/24 - Today I attempted suicide. I wanted the anxiety that had been getting progressively worse throughout the month to stop. I had been making plans for a while but didn't have a specific date until I decided it would be today.
My friend found out and made me call 911. The fire department came first, then the ambulance and police. They questioned me and then I got in the ambulance where they took my vitals and have me fluids. We live close to the hospital so the ride only lasted like...

Posted December 27th 2023 at 03:27 AM by Ennui. Comments 1
Posted in Uncategorized
I'm feeling low again. The medication I was put on a few months back worked for maybe 2-3 months and then I felt low again. I was going to kill myself after I finished the partial hospitalization program/intensive outpatient program but the medication was doing its job and I had hope that maybe things would be all right. So I didn't do it. But as usual it didn't last.

I don't get out much aside from the gym and group therapy. My therapist wants me to volunteer to get out of the house...

Posted October 1st 2023 at 04:15 AM by Ennui. Comments 3
Posted in Uncategorized
Things have definitely been up and down for me since I got out of the hospital in June.

I finished PHP/IOP but I made it clear that I didn't want to be there. I only completed it because my therapist said she wouldn't take me back if I didn't.

For the first few weeks I was self harming several times a week and didn't even care. If there was even the slightest inconvenience I was self harming. That's improved some but I still do self harm. I don't know if I'm ready to...

Posted June 23rd 2023 at 08:20 PM by Ennui. Comments 1
Posted in Uncategorized
5/30/23-5/31/23 - I got sent back to the hospital by my therapist because of an increase in depression and suicidal thoughts. She wasn't wrong to send me because I was spiraling towards another suicide attempt but I still fought it. She's also talking about sending me to residential treatment but I'll fight that.
The cop that met me at my house gave me a whole lecture on my bipolar and said how he has tons of experience with bipolar. He kept saying I need my meds adjusted even though I told...
Recent Comments
Hi Dez, I'm so sorry...
Posted Yesterday at 07:35 PM by NeuroBeautiful NeuroBeautiful is offline
I'm so sorry Dez and...
Posted March 9th 2024 at 12:38 PM by Arabesque- golfing girl. Arabesque- golfing girl. is offline
I'm so sorry Dez for...
Posted February 26th 2024 at 09:45 PM by Arabesque- golfing girl. Arabesque- golfing girl. is offline
I'm so sorry you are...
Posted December 27th 2023 at 01:24 PM by Arabesque- golfing girl. Arabesque- golfing girl. is offline
Dont worry about not...
Posted October 9th 2023 at 09:51 PM by WhisperingSilence WhisperingSilence is offline

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