Triggering (Suicide): mh and now this.

TW://
bro imma fucking tweak out
I was just in a damn mental hospital for over a damn week and the active SI hasn't gone away. I lied my way to discharge entirely, and pretty sure if I go to my outpatient program I might just break down and open about it. i fucking have 3 plans in mind of suicide(in case 1 or 2 fails I have others to go to). Unfortunately my life is this fucking close to ending. god idfk what to do anymore. I just wanna fucking kms. istg I might literally fucking do it.

Update: edit I took my medication but even what I did take got my head pounding and my stomach hurting. Kinda thinking about telling my safe teacher at school but I dunno.

[Arabesque- golfing girl.]

Hello, I'm sorry about all of this and when you can try talking to an adult about what is going on so that they can help you to be okay soon.

[¯|_(ツ)_|¯]

I do think you should tell the people in your outpatient program what you told us. They will have to send you to the hospital more than likely, but it may be worth it to go since you have a plan and intent. But this time try to be as honest as possible with the people at the hospital. They can only help you if you are open and honest with them, and willing to put in the work. I know you may not want to go back to the hospital so soon but if you're truthful and participate in the different groups and activities it can really help stabilize you and put you in a better place where you're more able to use the skills in the outpatient program you're in. You can probably go back to the outpatient program after you've been discharged from the hospital.

Yeah I did tell them and I got sent inpatient.

[Arabesque- golfing girl.]

Hi, I hope you are doing okay now and you are starting to feel better.