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Addictive Behaviours Discuss and receive support for addictions not related to substance use, such as gambling, Internet, sex or work addictions, in this forum.

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Unhappy I have a serious sex addiction. - November 5th 2012, 10:56 PM

I'm 16 years old and I guess I've known for awhile I was kinda a slut, recently I tallied up the Numbers of men I have slept with and it's over 30 people???
(mostly men though about 5 girls )
My dad left my family when I was 4 so he was never around maybe i'm sleeping around so much because i crave male attention? which is true. I mean like I don't have any female friends cause they know I will fuck their boyfriends and it's true..
how can I go about getting help for my addiction?
I was recently STD tested and i'm clean. ( right now at least )
and i'm not pregnant.
I guess i never could say no to male sexual advances..
I usually even push the boys I have sex with when they try to make a relationship with me just cause i'm scared of a real relationship..
help??
   
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Re: I have a serious sex addiction. - November 7th 2012, 12:34 AM

Welcome to TeenHelp! I hope you enjoy your stay here with us.

It is quite unfortunate that your father abandoned you at a crucial point in your life, but you are not the only one with that problem. Fathers walking out on their families has become somewhat of a common thing now. However, you are right in making the assumption that you have a problem. You are compensating for the absence of your father by having a lot of sex. Some people might conclude that you have "daddy issues", but this may or may not be true. You could simply be hypersexual.

You are a point where sex is practically irresistible to you. So, there is no point in continuing to have sex with a bunch of males when you know that is not going to solve the problem. Furthermore, there is really no definite cure for your problem, but I recommend getting into a relationship with a partner who shows proper restraint during sexual advances.

If you are simply not comfortable pursuing a relationship with someone, try engaging in (non-sexual) activities. Examples include sports, video games, etc. Your body and mind will be completely focusing on that particular activity. Should you find that activity to be quite interesting, try to turn it into a habit. Do not stay idle for long periods of time, as that may feed your ever-growing appetite for sex.

This is definitely going to be a challenge, but if you are up for it, just strap down and go at it. You may also invite a friend or two to tag along with you to take part in any activities you engage. Moral support can go a long way.

Good luck!

Last edited by Edward; November 7th 2012 at 01:53 AM.
   
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Re: I have a serious sex addiction. - November 12th 2012, 10:50 PM

Hiya, unfortunately I am going to have to be blunt here and say your issues with your dad are no excuse for having the amount of sex you do. Fathers walk out on their children all the time, mine did, but I don't sleep with every guy I see. The good news is that you have recognised you have a problem and want to stop it. That is the first step to stopping any addiction, be it drugs, alcohol, sex etc.

There is no right way of dealing with your cravings for male attention, but here are some suggestions:
. Think about the triggers. What do you do when you want to have sex with someone? How do you try to seduce them? Being aware of what you do when you want to have sex will enable you to mentally pop up a little red flag when the time comes to warn you of what you are doing.
. When the triggers arise try to remember this thread you just posted. Remind yourself that you don't want to be known as a 'slut'. Remind yourself that you lose friends over it. Remind yourself that you are worried about the consequences. Forcing yourself to remember these things should hopefully make you think twice.
. Distract yourself. I'm not sure if it is something you would consider but try watching porn, self pleasure or online sex chat (BE VERY CAREFUL HERE NOT TO GIVE OUT ANY PERSONAL DETAILS). You will get the same satisfaction without the labels.
. Learn to just enjoy the company of males. You don't have to always jump in bed with them. Practice simply spending time with them in public and you will still get the male attention you crave.
. You don't have to give up sex! It's not like alcohol where an alcoholic can never touch another drink again. Just keep it in moderation. If you have sex less often it will be more special and enjoyable when you do have sex.

I hope I helped x
   
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Red face Re: I have a serious sex addiction. - November 12th 2012, 11:14 PM

Ok, first off I would like to welcome you to the Teenhelp family!
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Alright, this sex addiction could be partially because of your father, but it might have begun like that and now is completely blown out of proportion. Personally I know someone like this who slept with everyone (when I say everyone, I mean, EVERYONE) and she used it as a social crutch, she was accepted into the popular crowd for losing her virginity young and being the only "woman" in the room. This girl felt like she had to keep having sex with everyone to keep up her bad girl image and, according to my sister, by 11th grade (my sis was in the same grade) she had even had sex with a 40 year old man for money. Don't let your "addiction" take control of your life. Wake up, focus on your studies, your real friends, your family, and learn to be proud of yourself and know that you do not need a man to correct your flaws, you have no flaws, you are a perfect you. You will never need to rely on a man to correct you, or to make you feel better through sex. Sex could be a way for someone to show you that they care, and that is what you really want now; but people can care about you in different ways. Another way to forget about sex, is get busy. If you have volleyball practice on Tuesdays, you cannot go over to some dude's house. Invite some friends over, go to the mall, join a club! I hope this helps you break this sex habit!


-LoveBites
   
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