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Anxiety and Stress This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.
How do I deal with thoughts that my friends hate me? -
March 23rd 2024, 02:19 AM
[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]So I know I’m an anxious person, and a people pleaser and I know that these thoughts are just me over thinking but I still don’t know how to make them go away. This has happened with multiple different people in my friend circle before, but it’s been one specific friend recently. They’re really nice to me and while they can appear intimidating it’s really only if you don’t know them. But lately I’ve felt awkward talking to them in person over text because I feel like I’m annoying them. I just wanna stop thinking like this, thoughts like this make me wanna cry, especially when it’s with some of my favorite people on the planet. Is there a way to make these thoughts go away?[/size][/color][/font]
Re: How do I deal with thoughts that my friends hate me? -
March 23rd 2024, 02:23 AM
[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]I should also add, this just happened. A group of friends came to see me and the rest of the cast in our schools musical, and it was awesome to see them, and I was going around to talk to everyone and kept gravitating back to my friends (the friend that it’s been happening with most lately also DMs our D&D campaign) and I was talking to them about D&D and stuff and after they left all the thoughts of being annoying started creeping in full force and idk why. It sucks.[/size][/color][/font]
Re: How do I deal with thoughts that my friends hate me? -
March 23rd 2024, 01:31 PM
Hello and thank you so much for coming onto teenhelp and telling us about what you have been going through and I hope you will be okay soon. When you are with all of your friends and they are talking about anything, movies, school, try to talk to them about this and also when they text you, try reading it and just text something back. Sometimes you don't have to talk for hours and text like you are writing a book. Just say what you feel you would like to say in person and in text, it can be anything from, I'm doing okay or I'm just tired because I have a lot on my mind, ect. I hope you will be okay soon and you are always welcome to join us if you ever wanted to.
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Re: How do I deal with thoughts that my friends hate me? -
March 28th 2024, 11:21 AM
Hi That sounds painful and frustrating. Ive felt that before and its not nice so Im sorry youre going through it too. When was the first time you experienced feeling like you were annoying? Like, not just with them but with other people before them?
Re: How do I deal with thoughts that my friends hate me? -
March 29th 2024, 12:40 AM
Hi there, thanks for reaching out! I'm sorry you've been having anxious thoughts, thoughts that your friends think you are annoying. I think that happens to a lot of us, especially when we have that one person we lean on the most. I would just observe them, their body language, their facial expression, their tone. I would imagine they have a good sense of establishing boundaries that they'd let you know when they need space. It doesn't seem like they have done that thus far, so I don't think you're annoying them at all!
Remember, our anxious brains love to gaslight us. It wants us to believe things that are not true. Finding safe and effective coping methods would really help with that. Better understanding the anxious brain would help as well, and I suggest seeking out a therapist if you haven't done so already. They'd be much more qualified to help you build that toolbox to combat anxiety.