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This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.
I suffer from severe anxiety and schizoaffective bipolar. My school put in my IEP that I use my anxiety as an avoidance and that I go from euphoric to negative attention seeking. I'm really upset about it. I have no clue what to do. It gets hard for me to stay in the classroom because I get anxious around crowds. Once I get anxious I start to hallucinate. I honestly try very hard to stay in class. But most of the time I need to talk to someone to get my mind off of what's bothering me. So I go to the nurse or the counselor and talk for a bit. I would never use it as an avoidance. I'm feeling really bad as of late and I've been brought to the point of suicidal ideation. What should I do?
Fading away, turning to dust.
With nowhere to go, and no one to trust.
I can understand why you would be upset by what your school put in the IEP. I know that cannot be easy. I think the one thing to remember about IEP plans is that they are done by people who don't fully know you. They might see certain behaviors and make assumptions. I have had similar things happen with my own IEP. I even had a teacher refuse to get me help for learning under the assumption that I just didn't pay attention.
Since this is bothering you so much you could probably have your parent or guardian discuss it with the school because the assumptions they are making might actually prevent you from getting help. IEP's are there to help and if the information contained in them is inaccurate the best thing to do is try and fix it.
As for the feelings you are having, do you have any way that you can distract yourself or keep yourself busy? I think that distractions from suicidal thoughts can be the best way to avoid harming oneself. I think it might help if you looked at the Alternatives and Coping Methods.
I hope this helped and please know you can talk to me if you need anything.