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dating a guy with a baby

First of all, sorry if this is in the wrong place

I've recently started dating someone, and we've clicked so perfectly, we can both see a future together. The thing is, he's 20 and has a one year old daughter. In theory, I'm fine with it, I know she will always come first, and always be a part of his life. He's been broken up with the mother since before the little one was born. He's a good dad, and it's lovely to see.

I've never really been around children, but I met her this week, and I've helped look after her, and bonded a little bit. It's all been quite nice.
Then it all suddenly became overwhelming. I guess the reality of it hit me. I'm not even entirely sure what the problem is. it's just suddenly very hard to deal with. I really need to get past this, if I do spend my life with this guy, then I will always have his child there too.
Has anyone got any advice on how to deal? Or has anyone been through it? How long did it take you to adjust to there being a child involved?

Re: dating a guy with a baby

Thank for you reaching out!

I can't imagine what it's like to date someone who has a child. I, myself, have never been put in that position, but it's great that you recognize that his child is going to come first, and that she'll always be a part of his life no matter what.

It's not going to be easy, that's for sure, but there is no added pressure on you to do anything. Yes, if you're going to be a part of his life, then you are going to be a part of her's as well. But, that doesn't mean you need to take on all the added responsibilities of "mommy". You can be there for her as a friend, a sister, or a mother if it's preferred.

The relationship is still new, and it IS going to take some time to get used too. Maybe talk to your boyfriend about this. Explain how you feel, and he can help you along the way.