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Showing results 1 to 181 of 181
Search took 0.01 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: Tigereyes
Forum: Why Me? December 1st 2020, 11:44 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

No one cares. No one understands. It's not that fucking simple! I'm tired of explaining over and over. I'm here alone to suffer. I'm ready to go.
Forum: Why Me? November 25th 2020, 11:33 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Only reason I'm not killing myself right now is because I'm not physically alone at the moment.
Forum: Why Me? November 25th 2020, 10:07 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's my birthday in a few days. Maybe I'll do something for myself for once and end this suffering for good. Happy birthday to me; I'm going to kill myself.
Forum: Why Me? November 17th 2020, 05:16 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Dissociating hard and no one cares. I need to drive, so I have no choice but to push through when I probably shouldn't. There's no one here. All alone. At least dissociation is better than...
Forum: Why Me? November 17th 2020, 02:05 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

The flashbacks make me extremely suicidal in the past time, and there's no way to know what's real and what's not. There's no advice for me because the first step is recognizing it's a flashback, and...
Forum: Why Me? November 14th 2020, 03:37 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

There's no help for me.
Forum: Why Me? November 12th 2020, 12:38 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I need to fucking kill myself. If it's still not better by mid-December, I'm fucking leaving. Same date I set like 5 months ago. Haven't fucking changed my mind because shit just keeps fucking...
Forum: Why Me? November 12th 2020, 09:47 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Vivid PSTD nightmares..
Forum: Why Me? October 4th 2020, 03:27 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Only thing I can do to help myself is finalize my suicide plan.
Forum: Why Me? October 3rd 2020, 07:43 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I've never felt so broken and alone. My parents will hate me very soon. Because of who I am... I'm sorry for being me.
Forum: Why Me? August 18th 2020, 09:42 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Today will be another bad day.
Forum: Why Me? August 15th 2020, 10:52 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Migraine still. For weeks. No treatment.
Forum: Why Me? August 12th 2020, 10:48 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Wish I could afford to see primary care provider and testing to fix this fatigue. If they'd even listen.
Forum: Why Me? August 12th 2020, 09:53 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I am sure I'm the least desireable candidate because I am introverted, traumatized, depressed, and chronically ill with severe fatigue. Or I'm feeling better and too extroverted for certain...
Forum: Why Me? July 29th 2020, 01:57 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I didn't have to majorly lie to my parents to keep their minimal support
Forum: Why Me? July 28th 2020, 10:03 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's been a long, bad, rough, awful, exhausting day.
Forum: Why Me? July 26th 2020, 12:13 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I am disposible to the entire country.
Forum: Why Me? June 23rd 2020, 10:52 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Time to go.
Forum: Why Me? June 22nd 2020, 09:21 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It doesn't get better. It never will. The only thing I can control is if I die by covid or suicide. At least suicide is faster.
Forum: Why Me? June 22nd 2020, 11:42 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why must disability discrimination be "legal" in the workplace?
Forum: Why Me? June 21st 2020, 01:12 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Only way to spend less is by cutting back on basic necessities. I already minimize spending on necessities. So I guess less food and lower nutrition food is all I can do. I can't cut back on rent....
Forum: Why Me? June 19th 2020, 04:12 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

All hope is gone.
Forum: Why Me? June 18th 2020, 02:07 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm not okay and I never will be. This life I'm living is too fucked up to be real. I am some character in a dystopian novel. Just another outcast with trauma that only gets worse the more you rise...
Forum: Why Me? June 2nd 2020, 12:10 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

There's another crisis at hand. I don't know what specifically it is yet. Today is already too much and more has yet to come. I've barely been awake half an hour, and today is too much.

"She's...
Forum: Why Me? June 1st 2020, 11:59 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I am fucking terrified of all the few possible outcomes. And I SHOULD be.
Forum: Why Me? May 27th 2020, 05:48 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

This university job is LITERALLY about to be the death of me. They're making high risk people go back to work to die.
Forum: Why Me? May 25th 2020, 04:11 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Well I fucked everything up even worse somehow
Forum: Why Me? May 24th 2020, 12:50 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

That feeling when you likely only have a couple weeks to live before suffering a horrible, slow, painful, lonely death. Part of me wants to just give up and go enjoy everything one last time before I...
Forum: Why Me? May 23rd 2020, 11:49 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I might actually have to return to work very soon, despite the pandemic hitting us harder than ever. That means I will probably die within a few weeks.
Forum: Why Me? May 21st 2020, 10:53 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why is it so hard to find someone who can keep it together when you've come undone?
Forum: Why Me? May 17th 2020, 02:36 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I get COVID-19, I will likely be a severe case with high probability of death. I don't want to die, but I keep thinking that if it comes to having a week left to live that killing myself could be...
Forum: Why Me? May 6th 2020, 01:06 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If they make me go back to work in 2 weeks to die, I might actually just end it myself. Because I don't want to slowly die like that... and if the other option is no income and unable to file for...
Forum: Why Me? May 5th 2020, 06:17 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Waiting for the possible debt/death sentence
Forum: Why Me? May 3rd 2020, 06:47 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really can't do this anymore
Forum: Why Me? May 3rd 2020, 02:33 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I regret staying alive for this.
Forum: Why Me? April 18th 2020, 11:58 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

At least it will be over soon.. one way or another... I'm tired of playing this game of life...
Forum: Why Me? April 17th 2020, 08:25 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I feel like I'm sitting here alone, powerless to do anything as I wait for death.
Forum: Why Me? April 16th 2020, 12:28 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

They might force us to go back to work in 2 weeks and just keep social distancing (not really possible with my job). If so, I guess it's time to work on a will and consider burning diaries. Because I...
Forum: Why Me? April 14th 2020, 08:23 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish there was something I could do to feel better, but there isn't; I will always feel this bad or worse until I die.
Forum: Why Me? April 9th 2020, 08:29 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Still feel so drained. Don't worry, I won't feel better. Not tomorrow, not ever.
Forum: Why Me? March 30th 2020, 12:33 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Skipping online recovery meetings because I can't stand everyone saying how grateful they are that they don't have any health problems during COVID-19, and that we should all be grateful for our...
Forum: Why Me? March 23rd 2020, 08:31 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Bought groceries today. It was hard finding food for myself as a disabled person. Each person wearing a mask is a threat to me--they are either sick and likely to get me sick, or they acting...
Forum: Why Me? March 20th 2020, 11:03 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I might not get through this after all.
Forum: Why Me? March 19th 2020, 11:45 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

After all this work to stop wanting to die, am I finally going to end up dying anyway?
Forum: Why Me? March 17th 2020, 02:19 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'd have killed myself by now for sure if I didn't have people I love and care about. Still want to. All the time.
Forum: Why Me? March 11th 2020, 11:54 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I get the coronavirus, it better just kill me. Since the forced quarentine would put me out of work longer than I can afford.
Forum: Why Me? March 9th 2020, 12:22 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I feel like hell, and this could just be normal for the rest of my life.
Forum: Why Me? February 22nd 2020, 09:32 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Anxious that my parents might've found a way to go through some of my stuff and found something out about me.. even though I don't live with them anymore and I'm 24.
Forum: Why Me? February 22nd 2020, 01:41 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Ah yes, I'm faking my chronic illness symtpoms to no one since I live alone. Which I shouldn't.
Forum: Why Me? February 20th 2020, 09:23 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I had killed myself years ago.
Forum: Why Me? January 19th 2020, 08:36 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Killed my caffeine tolerance two weeks ago, but still, no amount of caffeine will do anything to reduce this fatiguw. It's down to my muscles, but it's just depression right? Even though I'm not...
Forum: Why Me? December 16th 2019, 08:49 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I don't believe in hope anymore. And I can't accept help because I'm used to not having support.
Forum: Why Me? November 28th 2019, 12:44 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm still financially fucked, but now, differently too. Work is so expensive when you're poor. Only internet friends to offer emotional support, parents can't afford to help much financially. There's...
Forum: Why Me? November 20th 2019, 12:34 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Fatigue so bad. Still
Always. It never gets better.

If exploring life is my reason to live, and I don't have energy to do that, then why live?
Forum: Why Me? August 5th 2019, 11:12 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Staying alive a day at a time right now; that's honestly the best I can do for now
Forum: Why Me? August 2nd 2019, 10:35 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's so weird and wrong to have all my responsibilities, freedom, and privacy suddenly stripped away again after 4.5 years of living independently. I turn 24 in a few months.. stop treating me like...
Forum: Why Me? August 1st 2019, 11:00 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Making my first student loans payment of a few hundred today or tomorrow. Still don't have a real job. I hate my current job with my parents, but I can't afford to not work for them, and I'm...
Forum: Why Me? July 31st 2019, 11:03 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Yes, I can struggle through one day at a time to stay alive.

But why the fuck would I want to keep doing that where there's no light at the end of the tunnel?
Forum: Why Me? July 30th 2019, 09:53 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

What if I don't want to stay alive? Sure, maybe there are a couple good moments, but the neverending bad far outweighs the minimal good in my life.
Forum: Why Me? July 29th 2019, 11:06 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

These are the worst self-harm urges I've had in years, and I know I can resist them, but I don't know that I want to this time.
Forum: Why Me? July 24th 2019, 11:19 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Too sick to care what happens to me. At least that means no anxiety. Unfortunately, I still can't do the things anxiety prevented me from doing.
Forum: Why Me? July 19th 2019, 05:43 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I feel numb to the job search and so fatigued and physically sick.
Forum: Why Me? July 16th 2019, 11:18 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

4 interviews for 5 positions this week, which would be great if I wasn't too dead exhausted to focus on anything. I'm too numb to care right now.
Forum: Why Me? July 15th 2019, 11:55 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm supposed to unlearn my survivor behaviors to heal and grow, and I know I've made progress because now I'm in multiple situations that require my survivior self to stay alive but I'm having a hard...
Forum: Why Me? July 15th 2019, 10:16 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I "looked sick" enough to qualify for a day off. Referring to my parents, not a job. Not sure how I'll get by if I ever get lucky enough to get a job. I need stronger than caffeine to treat...
Forum: Why Me? July 11th 2019, 10:09 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

My body feels so weary and heavy..
Forum: Why Me? July 10th 2019, 12:16 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

"I shouldn't have to bully you into making you feel good about yourself."
Maybe don't fucking bully me?? It only makes me feel even worse about myself than I already do. Shocking, right?
Forum: Why Me? July 5th 2019, 05:11 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

The first hell weekend is here..
Forum: Why Me? July 3rd 2019, 11:03 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Desperately need a multi-month long nap.
Forum: Why Me? July 2nd 2019, 11:07 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Things are so bad, and I really just want to hold my cat.. But he's gone. He's been gone. And he's never coming back.
Forum: Why Me? June 28th 2019, 11:16 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Panic already setting in and interview doesn't start for another hour and 40 min. I need a couple benzos or alcohol or something. Anything
Forum: Why Me? June 15th 2019, 11:47 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I stay, I'm a constant problem. If I go, I've fixed some problems and created others for you. And myself, but at least if I go, I'd have my freedom back..
Forum: Why Me? June 14th 2019, 10:15 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I could take a few days off to just quit caffeine cold turkey. So I can abuse it again to function, instead of not being able to function even WITH caffeine.
Forum: Why Me? June 2nd 2019, 12:36 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It only gets worse. Guess it's time to start my goodbyes. And no, I'm not going to tell anyone first. Because no one cares enough to support me, but they care enough to stop me..
Forum: Why Me? May 28th 2019, 08:54 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I could change myself to be anything but aro ace, I would do it without hesitation.
Forum: Why Me? May 8th 2019, 12:00 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm dissociating more. It feels like I'm just in limbo. For every aspect of my life. I feel too much pain, but now it almost doesn't even feel real--like it's happening to a charqcter in one of my...
Forum: Why Me? April 29th 2019, 01:39 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm too sick to eat, and I'm okay with that.
Forum: Why Me? April 12th 2019, 01:06 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I didn't have fucking work later, Id'd fucking relapse right now. Because fuck this shit. Fuck my life. Fuck everything. Nothing works. Nothing works out. Nothing's okay. I'm just fucking...
Forum: Why Me? March 29th 2019, 04:57 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Been so sick for so long that I got sick yet again too. Is being exhausted valid NOW?
Forum: Why Me? March 28th 2019, 02:17 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I've set a date. If it doesn't get better by then, I'm giving up. For good.
Forum: Why Me? March 22nd 2019, 11:55 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Been living off of caffeine pills and stress and sugar. My body is dead exhausted and so am I. I don't want to try anymore. I have no motivation left. Why fucking bother when effort doesn't give you...
Forum: Why Me? March 21st 2019, 01:11 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I just need a friend.. really badly..

And a safe place to live. And enough money for bills and food... but nothing else.

Is that really so unreasonable?
Forum: Why Me? February 22nd 2019, 01:56 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I actually miss homework and studying because at least I know how to push through that and be productive. This career shit--I have no fucking idea what I'm doing or how to make progress. I feel...
Forum: Why Me? January 16th 2019, 03:27 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Seems like this journal is my only friend, and eventually I won't even have that left..
Forum: Why Me? December 25th 2018, 04:21 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

The truth is I'm really struggling
Forum: Why Me? December 18th 2018, 05:53 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I just really want to die.. I'm sorry for not being good enough.
Forum: Why Me? November 5th 2018, 01:16 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really want to get high so I can feel better for once
Forum: Why Me? October 31st 2018, 11:33 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's Halloween, and you know what's scary? All these major assignments and exams that are all fucking due!
Forum: Why Me? October 30th 2018, 02:47 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If these grades don't work out after everything I've done, I'm giving up on life.
Forum: Why Me? October 21st 2018, 03:18 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Accidentally gave myself an anxiety attack right before this timed exam, and I have really bad test anxiety.
Forum: Why Me? October 20th 2018, 02:48 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why must online classes have weekend only exams that are meant to take WAY longer than normal exams? Like I don't normally have lots of homework to do over the weekend.
Forum: Why Me? October 18th 2018, 10:15 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If I don't finish this schoolwork, I'm going to end it. Guess tonight's the night to make it or die. Fuck this. I'm done.
Forum: Why Me? October 14th 2018, 12:27 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Seriously considering ending it in a few days. I can't even function. But I have to keep up with an impossible semester. And i just can't. There's no time or energy for anythign that's not school...
Forum: Why Me? October 13th 2018, 02:16 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Caffeine isn't helping enough to let me push through the chronic fatigue and burnout. You know what would help? Uppers. You know who has a connect? My professor.
Forum: Why Me? October 10th 2018, 03:26 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

The excessive caffeine isn't working anymore, but I need it to work for another 2 weeks..
Forum: Why Me? October 8th 2018, 12:51 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I almost didn't come back last night.. But it's fine right?
Forum: Why Me? October 6th 2018, 09:51 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Ah yes.. I'm sooo happy right now. Probably look it because I feel relief at seeing the end..
Forum: Why Me? October 6th 2018, 02:54 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Will it ever get better? Or should I just end it earlier than planned? Because even then seems too far away...
Forum: Why Me? October 5th 2018, 11:40 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I've pushed myself so hard that now it's a huge struggle just to get ready in the morning. Never mind the piles of homework with rapidly approaching deadlines or classes with mandatory attendence.
Forum: Why Me? October 4th 2018, 01:01 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

*Pushes self so hard in school that I make myself really sick*
Profs: Good for you for pushing yourself and being on top of things! Keep it up!
Me: ... *Makes self sicker by continuing to push...
Forum: Why Me? October 3rd 2018, 08:40 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

My prof is definitely on uppers.. probably cocaine..
Forum: Why Me? October 3rd 2018, 02:01 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Pushed myself so hard that I'm too sick to make it to classes, even though they all have mandatory attendence.
Forum: Why Me? October 2nd 2018, 02:46 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why couldn't I have just dropped out freshmen year... would've saved a lot of money.
Forum: Why Me? September 29th 2018, 01:25 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

All this caffeine, but it's not helping enough. In fact, it's making me sick more than it's helping, but it still helps some, so I need it anyway.
Forum: Why Me? September 28th 2018, 11:20 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Dreamed about doing piles of schoolwork. Wish the dream was real 'cause then I'd have a chance of getting it all done.
Forum: Why Me? September 27th 2018, 03:03 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

College really makes me want to die... And no one cares.
Forum: Why Me? September 23rd 2018, 11:43 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

My new motto for this semester: If you're not working, you're procrastinating.
Forum: Why Me? September 21st 2018, 10:17 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

However much I do, it's never enough
Forum: Why Me? September 20th 2018, 01:13 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

"Sometimes goodbye's the only way..."
Forum: Why Me? September 19th 2018, 10:31 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Just got home from an unexpectedly really long day. Time to do more homework 'cause I'm still way behind. Oh and make dinner and wash dishes before and after I make dinner. With what energy?
Forum: Why Me? September 15th 2018, 02:24 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's really easy to tell which professors also struggle with disabilities (or at least are close to someone who does) and which don't. Really did not need to be told "good for you!" for pushing...
Forum: Why Me? September 5th 2018, 12:26 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Too fatigued. Can't focus on reading 'cause I'm so exhausted that all the words run together. Can't make words do the thing for writing either. That's my classes this semester. Kill me.
Forum: Why Me? August 28th 2018, 05:16 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

This whole semester is so unreasonable that I can't even imagine how bad it'll actually be (after many other hell semesters). Literally laughing about this shit because how can it even be real?
Forum: Why Me? August 22nd 2018, 02:49 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Day 1 of the semester was already too much. Someone please kill me.. Tomorrow will be worse. And then it'll get even worse. I want to die..
Forum: Why Me? August 20th 2018, 02:37 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

School hasn't even started yet, and I already can't handle it.
Forum: Why Me? August 12th 2018, 11:21 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really need someone to talk to... But I need to stop reaching out for help because I always end up hurting those I reach out to.
Forum: Why Me? August 6th 2018, 04:37 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Talking about my problems and/or how I feel is bad.
Forum: Why Me? July 22nd 2018, 01:00 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why does caffeine have to make me sick? I need it to overcome the chronic fatigue.. oh well, feeling sick is better than having no energy.
Forum: Why Me? July 19th 2018, 09:51 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really need a hug
Forum: Why Me? July 14th 2018, 03:33 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I knew why you invited me to go with you...
Forum: Why Me? July 9th 2018, 05:14 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm sorry I've made it so you feel you can't talk to me about anything important.
Forum: Why Me? June 25th 2018, 07:43 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Maybe there's no hope for me after all...
Forum: Why Me? June 21st 2018, 02:11 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

What if I don't want to recover for myself? Should I just give up on recovery then?
Forum: Why Me? June 10th 2018, 12:57 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

So tired, can't focus on work. Need to focus on myself, but you need my help. I've worked like 2 full weeks straight for you, no days off, no weekends. Can't I please have a break? You're wearing...
Forum: Why Me? June 9th 2018, 06:51 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Panic attacks make me want to drink..
Forum: Why Me? June 9th 2018, 01:20 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I can't go back again for "a week or so." Please stop trying to force me to do way more than I can handle.
Forum: Why Me? June 8th 2018, 09:59 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

This apartment is too quiet with everyone gone.. Just me and my thoughts alone in silence.
Forum: Why Me? June 5th 2018, 09:52 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Wow I was really fucked up and so was my life. Oh... and that hasn't changed..
Forum: Why Me? May 29th 2018, 01:20 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really don't know what to do, but I have to figure it out RIGHT now. There are no good options, just bad and worse. And I have to keep my mouth shut about all of this so that I don't make things...
Forum: Why Me? May 28th 2018, 12:55 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

So basically I have to get better on my own without relying on anyone or you're going to leave me. I wish I could believe I can get better at all, even WITH support, but I don't. Sink or swim on my...
Forum: Why Me? May 27th 2018, 11:13 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

These self-destructive thoughts are so out of control...
Forum: Why Me? May 27th 2018, 05:25 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really need support...
Forum: Why Me? May 26th 2018, 09:43 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

How did today go so wrong?
Forum: Why Me? May 24th 2018, 03:29 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I could just stop having emotional needs. Then I wouldn't have a problem with them never being met
Forum: Why Me? May 23rd 2018, 01:58 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Why is everything I say, do, and feel wrong? Why is my every reaction wrong? Why can't I do anything right? I wish I could just constantly feel numb so that I wouldn't cause all these fucking...
Forum: Why Me? May 21st 2018, 02:54 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really want to relapse so I can have some relief from this shit--even though it'd only be temporary. Better than nothing.
Forum: Why Me? May 21st 2018, 02:07 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

"Your worst day in recovery is always better than your best day in relapse."
Fuck that bullshit. Why the fuck do you think I turned to substances anyway? Because life was so fucking bad for so...
Forum: Why Me? May 15th 2018, 03:10 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Do I even have any friends left?
Forum: Why Me? May 14th 2018, 02:32 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

How could you even think about trying to replace him?? And so soon? I don't want another cat yet. I don't want another maine coon yet. I just want to be alone with my grief for a while.. you can...
Forum: Why Me? May 13th 2018, 03:43 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm really not sure I can stay clean/sober anymore. I'm sorry for disappointing and hurting you.
Forum: Why Me? May 9th 2018, 06:55 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Anxiety about this final exam is so bad that I can't study for the exam I'm anxious about
Forum: Why Me? May 9th 2018, 12:42 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

No one can handle my shit. That's okay, neither can I.
Forum: Why Me? May 8th 2018, 04:55 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Took one final and now my brain and body are completely shutting down. But there's still two more to go...
Forum: Why Me? May 7th 2018, 02:55 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I know it's not my business if you're talking about me or not, and I know you said it's not bad things about me, but I'm so paranoid about that, and it doesn't go away. I'm pretending not to be...
Forum: Why Me? May 6th 2018, 11:15 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Been taking benadryl to sleep, and I think it's fucking with my memory.
Forum: Why Me? May 5th 2018, 07:53 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

This is too much to handle. I want to get high, but I can't do that right now because it's finals week.
Forum: Why Me? May 3rd 2018, 01:38 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Finals week has only just begun, but I'm already struggling
Forum: Why Me? April 28th 2018, 11:42 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm too worn out to do homework, and finals week essentially starts next week. Caffeine isn't helping enough. How am I supposed to do all this work and study? My body is quitting on me. Will I...
Forum: Why Me? April 25th 2018, 02:04 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

No one understands my experiences yet they judge me for it, and I'm so sick of dealing with this shit. I just want to drop out of college, but it's too late. Will there ever be a day that college...
Forum: Why Me? April 23rd 2018, 12:26 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really want to get high right now... everything is constantly too much.
Forum: Why Me? April 19th 2018, 08:07 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

My body is failing me but the semester isnt over yet
Forum: Why Me? April 18th 2018, 01:32 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Can these fatigue attacks stop please? I don't have time for this.
Forum: Why Me? April 16th 2018, 11:09 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

It's only 6:45am, but I'm already running out of energy for the day.
Forum: Why Me? April 15th 2018, 10:59 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Desperately need this semester to be over but theres still a whole month left...
Forum: Why Me? April 14th 2018, 01:52 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Hiding my emotions so that it doesn't get worse again...
Forum: Why Me? April 7th 2018, 02:48 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Sobriety just took away my way of coping and now I have nothing and I can't fucking deal with this shit alone anymore AND stay clean from everything. Is it really so bad to just want some relief...
Forum: Why Me? April 6th 2018, 07:42 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Can life just chill for a day please?
Forum: Why Me? April 2nd 2018, 11:51 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I just want to numb this pain and stress
Forum: Why Me? March 31st 2018, 07:58 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I just really need my cat right now but hes gone and is never coming back and nothing will ever be okay again. Ill never be okay again
Forum: Why Me? March 29th 2018, 08:15 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I have to try harder, but I've already spent all my energy pushing myself too hard a while ago and I'm out. I have to try harder, but I don't have energy left to try at all. My body is literally...
Forum: Why Me? March 28th 2018, 08:45 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I can't keep up with school anymore. I can't do it anymore. I've pushed myself way too hard for way too long and it's catching up to me. I can't somehow pull it off anymore. It's too much. I'm...
Forum: Why Me? March 26th 2018, 12:59 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I really just want my DoC because feeling numb is the only way to feel better, which is what you need from me and what I need from myself. But it will destroy me, which will hurt you more. But if...
Forum: Why Me? March 23rd 2018, 09:25 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm doing more and more questionable things in attempt to cope with the pain and find energy I don't have to get through school. I'm starting to scare myself, but I see no other way that won't lead...
Forum: Why Me? March 16th 2018, 02:36 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm so sick and tired of all these bad days... You tell me that I deserve to feel better, but I don't get to and then you keep treating me otherwise. And there's only one way to feel better, but it...
Forum: Why Me? March 15th 2018, 03:08 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Is it really so bad to have just a taste of relief so I don't end up doing so much worse?
Forum: Why Me? March 12th 2018, 09:32 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I've been walking, trying to balance on the edge of relapse for so long. Now I can feel myself wobbling. I'm about to fall, and I'm not sure which side I'll end up on.
Forum: Why Me? March 5th 2018, 10:00 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish it wasn't too late to drop out...
Forum: Why Me? February 18th 2018, 09:10 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I don't have energy, motivation, or time for all this but need to do all of it.
Forum: Why Me? February 14th 2018, 08:43 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I just want to get as fucked up as possible, anyway possible
Forum: Why Me? February 10th 2018, 02:36 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Can life just chill for a day? Please? I need some time to recovery and get caught up in everything and process death and trauma
Forum: Why Me? February 9th 2018, 12:02 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

Life is ironic sometimes. I have multiple life crises going on right now, and it's too much to deal with--too painful.. I just want to feel numb and escape the pain. So naturally my bio class...
Forum: Why Me? January 29th 2018, 02:30 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

This semester might actually kill me, but I can't take time off or reduce workload. I feel trapped, and the only options seem to be drop out or die, but it's too late to drop out.
Forum: Why Me? January 11th 2018, 08:04 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I wish I had someone to talk to about this. But I don't. And I don't know what to do. But I can't do this.
Forum: Why Me? January 11th 2018, 12:53 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

If it's only the 2nd day of the semester and the fatigue is so bad already, how the hell am I going to survive the rest of this semester?
Forum: Why Me? December 17th 2017, 12:40 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I can't keep this up. If I want the pain to stop, I have to face what's behind it. But I'm afraid to. I'm afraid to let in the truth and acknowledge the consequences and pain.

Also I'm so...
Forum: Why Me? December 13th 2017, 07:04 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I don't want anything anymore. I don't want to feel better, to be happy, or any of that. I just want to feel nothing. Even if that means I never feel anything positive again. Because the pain is...
Forum: Why Me? December 12th 2017, 06:53 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I've lost everyone else and everything else. I'll try to fix this with you, but if it doesn't work and I lose you too, I'm honestly probably just going to finally end it. This hurts too much. I'm...
Forum: Why Me? December 11th 2017, 02:59 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm not sure I believe that recovery is possible anymore... Even if it is,
maybe it's too late for me, maybe I don't want it.
Forum: Why Me? December 11th 2017, 04:45 AM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I guess now my biggest regret is not killing myself before people needed me. I wish I could end it because this is too much. I can't stay alive, stay clean, and stay in college all at once. But I've...
Forum: Why Me? November 13th 2017, 04:38 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm struggling a lot right now and feel like I have no one to talk to because people just want to give advice rather than actually listen. They tell me to just take meds because I'll never be happy...
Forum: Why Me? August 17th 2017, 02:59 PM
Replies: 2,130
Views: 56,385
Posted By Tigereyes
Re: Complaint of the Day 2

I'm so stressed about college even though the next semester hasn't even started yet.
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