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Showing results 1 to 19 of 19
Search took 0.00 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: Lamia

Forum: Why Me?

February 13th 2014, 10:18 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

It's 6 AM and I'm alone, sobbing my eyes out in the bath. What a sad excuse for a human being I am.
Just kill me already. I can't take any more of this.

Forum: Why Me?

August 14th 2013, 07:49 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

I hate this body. I want to die.

Forum: Why Me?

August 13th 2013, 05:00 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

My writing sucks. I'm just not good enough. I wrote and wrote and wrote and it just never came out right, ever. I can't do it. I fooled myself into thinking, for awhile, that I was good at it, just...

Forum: Why Me?

July 3rd 2013, 06:36 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

The urges are getting worse. I feel like these threads are chronicling my descent.

Forum: Why Me?

June 29th 2013, 07:05 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

I'm trans. Those two words have fucked my life.

Forum: Why Me?

June 25th 2013, 03:15 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

I'm going to die, aren't I? Not eighty years down the road, but soon. And if it's not some spiteful person who ends it, I'll probably end it myself, right?

There's this hole in my chest. It's tiny...

Forum: Why Me?

June 3rd 2013, 03:31 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

You're being stupid and unreasonable, Kat. Stop letting this hurt you so much. Stop it. You're going to lose what friends you have if you keep this up. Just stop being such an unreasonable bitch and...

Forum: Why Me?

May 22nd 2013, 01:03 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Wow. I thought my mood was better than this.

Stupid mind, why do you have to go and make my day bad for no reason?

Forum: Why Me?

April 27th 2013, 04:25 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

I needneedneedneedneed to be out NOW. I can't take the hiding and the wondering. I NEED to know who my real friends are, because the question of who's going to inevitably abandon me is driving me...

Forum: Why Me?

April 19th 2013, 04:47 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Wasn't enough to come out on here. It wasn't enough to come out to my mom, therapist, best friend. Nope. Apparently I'm going to blurt out what at this point should be the most cautiously kep secret...

Forum: Why Me?

April 6th 2013, 08:14 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

It only takes one look at the news to remember that I could have very real reasons to fear for my life if I transition. And that terrifies me in ways you can't begin to imagine.

Forum: Why Me?

April 4th 2013, 01:01 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

I'm scared to near paralytic levels by the thought of growing up. Physically, not responsibly. I'm scared of becoming a man, because I'm not one. Someone should SERIOUSLY tell my body that....

Forum: Why Me?

March 29th 2013, 06:40 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

(Very triggering)
I want to cut right now. I've never cut, I haven't wanted to in three years. Just as I was starting to get comfortable being "probably transgender" the pain, insecurity, fear, and...

Forum: Why Me?

March 21st 2013, 04:06 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Terrified I'm going to try it, look in the mirror, and still hate what I see.

Forum: Why Me?

March 14th 2013, 10:09 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Who the fuck am I? I thought I knew, and then that was torn down two months ago, and then, recently, I thought I knew again, and now that's being torn down and replaced by this doubt. I don't know...

Forum: Why Me?

March 12th 2013, 04:21 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

So it's lunch now. So far today:

I've been lectured by my mother, during which I started crying because something she said triggered me.

Almost gotten into a car accident.

Gotten...

Forum: Why Me?

March 9th 2013, 08:15 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Friday cannot come soon enough. Why the fuck am I going through this, and why the fuck is it ripping me apart?

Forum: Why Me?

March 6th 2013, 01:18 AM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

Fuck. The dysphoria is back. It's back, and now I'm curled up in the bathtub crying typing this from my phone because I need to put it out there. I've told people, sure, but it still feels like my...

Forum: Why Me?

February 21st 2013, 10:17 PM

Replies: 10,627

Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

Views: 334,235

Posted By Lamia

Re: Screaming thread.

CAN I just scream in this thread? That's honestly all I want to do at this point, just go somewhere, be completely alone and just scream.

I honestly don't know what's happened to me. Where did I...

Showing results 1 to 19 of 19

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