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-   -   Triggering (Suicide): Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it.. (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f11-depression-suicide/t106825-sad-i-cant-help-but-want-just-end/)

fuckinghateniggers July 23rd 2012 08:19 PM

Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
I'm sad idk how to get past this my heart hurts so bad I lost the love of my life now the only guy that I could be interested in doesn't see me ik I'm not worth it ik that not the girl everyone wants but I do have a heart I do have feelings I feel so much I live so deep but no one sees it no one notices it I cry so much my heart is shattered I feel like I'm only holding my loved back I use to cut but I kicked that habit now I feel like the only way to stop this pain is to just end it..

Hiraeth July 24th 2012 04:52 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
I see it, how deeply you have lived and loved, and I want to acknowledge and honor that, because it takes so much courage to open up so completely, to be vulnerable so completely.

When I am feeling things like this, I stop everything and come back to myself, to take of myself - because it is times like these where we need our own care the most. Our own attention, gentleness, patience, and understanding - that loss and grief takes time. We take care of ourselves and allow whatever the feeling is, to just be, because there is something to be honored in the openness and depth of experience that is behind the overwhelming sadness. Taking care of ourselves is also taking care of our ability to love and open up - for, if those abilities could speak to the person they reside in, they would probably tell of how heartbroken they would be to know that they were responsible for the person's tragic and early end!

It's okay to feel sad right now. It's okay to take as much time as you need. Breathe deeply and be gentle. Hold yourself in your arms. You'll be alright. :hug: If you need someone, I am here.

bullystopper1999 July 25th 2012 12:20 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
That is not the answer!!! And if u luv someone u shud tell them u nvr know if tomorrow will come so its best to tell them... ending ur life is not the answer and if u think no one cares i do... and if i were 2 find out u were gone tomorrow then i wud cry... idk u but suicide is nvr the answer!!!

Reign. July 25th 2012 12:50 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
I fully agree with both above comments.

Sweetie, you are a beautiful person and you should not feel like that! Killing yourself will only take away the chance you have for someone to see how wonderful you are in the future. Be patient and try to keep your chin up babe. We're always here for you, so you're not alone.
If you need someone, I'm here. ~Kayla.

fuckinghateniggers July 25th 2012 02:24 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Thank you all for replying I read them and took them to heart I wish I was a beautiful person if I was then he wouldn't have dropped me so easily I can't seem to push pash this all I can do is cry I keep trying to push away the thoughts of cutting away the pain but everyday I get closer to it I'm mourning myself to death this ik some part of me doesn't care the other part lays dormant I feel alone and unloved undesired idk what else to do

Reign. July 25th 2012 03:16 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Babe, if he dropped you, he DOESN'T DESERVE YOU. You ARE beautiful. You do not need to feel like that dear. -hug- I am so sorry for what you're going through and I hope that you feel better soon, just keep in mind that everything happens for a reason.

fuckinghateniggers July 25th 2012 03:31 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
*hugs* I miss him so much we where perfect and I mean it we had never met before when It was like the day before we where gonna meet he cut his finger badly had to have 4 stitches in his finger then he changed I thought it was the meds but it wasnt he accused me of cheating and not living him :(( I loved him dearly and never cheated he said that I turned his heart to stone he broke me badly I've started drinking more just to numb the pain no one wants me I don't blame them for not wanting me :(( I feel so...empty

Reign. July 25th 2012 03:36 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Babe, stop feeling like that. He had no right to accuse you when he had no proof. Now listen, I'm sure someone out there will want you. Being patient is key. Please do not let him turn your life upside down. Don't dwell on the past, the most healthy thing you can do is let go and move on. Don't let it destroy you.

fuckinghateniggers July 25th 2012 09:36 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
I have moved on but it's killing me inside that I'm so alone at nights I have to drink myself to sleep I feel so used ancona worthless Idk how to pull through ik no one will want me I'm not enough for anyone

Reign. July 26th 2012 02:20 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Yes, you are enough. You are beyond enough. You are beautiful and strong and you can make it through this.

I have a bf, but we're long-distance. I know what it feels like for him to hold me in his arms, but we never see each other. It haunts me at night too. I know how it feels. You feel alone, helpless, afraid that things will never change.

But they will! Keep yourself positive and strong and you'll make it! I know you can. YOU know you can.

Don't self-medicate. That makes things worse. Instead, write in a journal. Write down all your feelings, whatever they might be. All your thoughts and emotions, and I promise you will find more comfort in that than in drinking.

fuckinghateniggers July 26th 2012 04:06 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
We where together for over a year....this proves that I am an idiot for thinking that I was actually loved..

NevermindMe July 26th 2012 06:31 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
No, you're not an idiot. You loved him, and he betrayed that.

Love is caused by a chemical reaction in the brain, it can make you completely unaware of what's happening right in front of you. It's biology, and not your fault. You believed in someone, and in turn they took advantage of you, but that's no fault of your own.

You're 18. The average lifespan for a woman is roughly 86. So 43 is half your life, that means 21.5 is a quarter of your life. You're not even a quarter done yet. This means, statistically speaking you likely haven't:

Met your best friend.
Seen the funniest haircut.
Met the person you'll love the most.
Heard the best song.
Heard the best joke.
Seen your favourite movie.

And so much ore. Add whatever you want to that list, the point is you've seen less than a quarter of what your life has to offer.

He was a bastard who obviously hurt you, but killing yourself to get revenge on him will harm others far worse than he harmed you. You'll be hurting your mother, father, siblings, friends, pets, grandparents, and countless other people you haven't even met yet. You'll be putting so many people through what he put you through. You need to be strong for everyone else.

- Justin

fuckinghateniggers July 26th 2012 03:43 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
But I'm not strong

Reign. July 26th 2012 05:25 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
You are. And deep down, you know it.

fuckinghateniggers July 27th 2012 04:16 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
I can't be

fuckinghateniggers July 27th 2012 04:27 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Im not..all I do is cry if I have drink in the house I drink until I pass out..

Reign. July 27th 2012 04:06 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Then don't do that! You're only making the problem worse sweetie. You're only hurting yourself more.

BeautifulDisaster95 July 27th 2012 04:27 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Oh dear,
I'm sorry you're going through a tough time, but it passes and the sun will shine again. You've got to pick yourself back up, you can't let this knock you down permenantly cause the fact in life is that you'll have lots of partners and lots of heart aches but you can handle this.

Every woman has a special strength inside of them. Find your strength, and take control. You'll be happy again. You've just got to believe there's more out there for you because I know there is.

At the moment you're making yourself as miserable as can be. You've gotta be as strong as can be. It's a step by step process.

Look up inspirational quotes, moving on quotes. They've always helped me and I know they can help you. They can help anybody. :)
You can do this. You really can and don't lie to yourself. You've come this far, you've learned so much. Don't throw it all away.

NevermindMe July 27th 2012 04:55 PM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
You might not be strong, if you're considering suicide you are probably very weak at this moment. However, you can be strong. You can make yourself strong. One day at a time you can focus on making yourself happier, and finding things to live for.

I know it's hard to deal with, but killing yourself is pointless. It serves no purpose, other than to alienate and harm the people you really love. Bullies, or mean people who you want revenge on won't care if you die. They might even be happy that a little annoyance in their life is gone. He simply will not care if you kill yourself. However you family and friends will care, and they will be the ones to suffer for your bad choice.

- Justin

fuckinghateniggers July 28th 2012 02:07 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
But it hurts being in this deep of pain idk what else to do or where else to turn

Soliloquitious July 28th 2012 03:08 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Years and years of binge drinking and blazing led to the amazing conclusion that it was extremely idiotic to drown my sorrows in substances. It's a repeating cycle, you drink when you're depressed and for a couple hours everything is nonexistent in your mind. But once you sober up the combined force of the loss of euphoria along with the still remaining issues forces you to drink again. Go to whatever local club/park/etc that suits your interests and attempt to meet people. If you haven't a specific thing in mind, reach out to guys and/or girls your own age. You'd be amazed what the average person conceals in their daily persona. And who knows, maybe you'll come across another guy who wants the world for you. All that's needed is for you to forget and forgive. I sincerely hope things get better :D

fuckinghateniggers July 28th 2012 03:31 AM

Re: Sad..I can't help but to want to just end it..
 
Thank u but no one wants me :((


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