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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
woody777 Offline
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Unhappy cant take this anymore...:( - August 23rd 2012, 12:00 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

this is my story sorry to blag on but i need to get it off my chest due to have no one body to speak to.

i had just left school i was loving life had a laugh with all my mates and everything was going right for me, i applied for the British army which i always the day after i left school which i always was one of my dreams in life i passed my tests etc to get in the army i was on top of the moon had a start date for basic training so anyway i went through basic even had my 18th birthday there and final completed basic training family came to my pass off parade and never felt so proud in my life.

Then i moved on to the phase 2 part of training i loved that two nothing was putting me down everything was great

finaly got my posting to go to my unit in oxford shire i was there 3 months from day 1 at my unit i was on pre op training to go to Afghanistan my troop was named as serge troop so we was filling in for people who needed to go back to the UK so off i went to Afghanistan i was barely 18 i was out there for 14 days before i got posted back to the UK it was the most scariest thing iv ever done in my life it was very doom but finally got back to the UK after 14 days to be told i will not be receiving a medal due to i need to have done 25 days out there i didn't get any extra money i just did it for a sun tan...

best thing about this situation i didn't tell my family or friends i was going.. due to didn't want them worrying and too this day i have still not told them
after this i felt like i had done everything in the army so i left which was a long process to get out but i was aloud to leave so i did.

i was feeling depressed of thoughts i was having night mares about my time in Afghanistan i still have flash backs now...

so i was still going to carry on things wasn't going my way at all i then applied for loads of jobs and couldn't get one at all then i applied for police man when they did a security check on me to find out on my record "it says ive been in prison for 2 criminal offences which on the record says i should still be in prison till next year for one of these offences so currently disputing this but iv lost the job because of this..

now am on dole.. no money to do anything and i feel like life as hit me in the face and things would be easier if i was dead...

well there's my story you can flame me for what ever not botherd just needed to get off my chest

ps sorry about the grammer couldnt be bothed to write it fully ..
   
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Anonimous Offline
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Re: cant take this anymore...:( - August 25th 2012, 02:04 AM

Hey Ben,
I'm sorry and confused that nobody replied yet.
So here i go: I don't know anything about army life, Especially in afghanistan so i can not imagine how scary it is. But one thing is clear, You are feeling so bad because you didn't tell anyone. Talk to someone about what happened, Maybe you can get a therapist? Or a friend whom you trust. I don't get how you were able to join the army while you have been in prison for 2 criminal offences?
I hope you read this although it has been 2 days already.
Anyways, good luck! (You can pm me if you want)
   
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Adam the Fish Offline
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Re: cant take this anymore...:( - August 25th 2012, 02:11 AM

It's also worth noting that (certainly in the UK), there are many different charities that you can approach for help with things like this. I would suggest researching some, then getting help there.
As Anonimous suggested, talk to someone close to you too.

Finally, I'm shocked to hear about the mess up on the PNC.
For now, I suppose you'll need to live on benefits (don't feel too bad about that, it's the state's fault that you couldn't get a job!) - once your name is cleared, try again.

Again, in the short term, you must talk to someone.


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