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I've been here a while
Celaena-Sardothian's Avatar
Name: Hannah
Age: 22
Gender: Female
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Join Date: April 25th 2012

Scared - September 30th 2012, 07:16 AM

I don't know if I can do it anymore.

I want to keep going . . . but only because I know what it would do to my sister . . . at the same time I don't care. Selfish, I know. But I don't want to be here anymore. The pills in the cupboard are looking way too tempting. And I'm scared I'm gonna do it.

I don't know what to do. I know I need to keep fighting. But I dunno if I can . . . it's too hard. I've been trying for too long, and it's not getting any easier. I can't stop cutting . . . and I want so bad to bleed out. I can't stop.

I don't know what to do I'm so scared
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Palmolive Offline
Purr Purr Purr.
Jeez, get a life!
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Name: Jessie
Age: 25
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Re: Scared - September 30th 2012, 09:44 PM

Hi there,

It's good that you want to keep going. If you want this, you can do this Set your mind on something and you'll achieve. Holding on for reasons such as for your sister is great too. But I think sometimes we get to a point, where we can't hold on for others, that we have to do do it for ourselves, you know? Yes, suicide is a selfish act but we all know you don't intend to be selfish. Sometimes these thoughts get too overwhelming that killing ourselves really does feel like the best way out for us and I can understand that but I want you to know that it isn't true. You honestly have your whole life ahead of you and so much to look forward too.

At the end of the day, you're in control. The only person who can stop you from hurting yourself, is yourself. At times this can be hard to cope with but if you want to hurt yourself, you'll always find a way. But you can beat these thoughts and urges. You honestly can. I know it's hard but if you keep fighting and keep your mind set, you'll overcome this and you can have your life back. And the same goes for the cutting. Ultimately, you can stop yourself but that's your decision to make. You're the one in control of your actions. At the end of the day, self harm isn't going to help, not in reality. And you ARE worth more than it. If you want things to change, change them.

If there is anything you ever want to talk to us about, know that we're here to listen and we'll always do our best to try and help and support you as much as we can do. You're worth this and I promise that recovery is possible. Don't be alone though, let people support you.

Keep your chin up,

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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