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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Learning to live again. - November 9th 2012, 10:53 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Okay, so. Nearly two weeks ago I made a serious attempt at suicide, to the extent that I didn't expect to regain consciousness or whatever.

I did.

And now, I have to learn about living again. I was so prepared to die, that I didn't think of anything in the future. My body's okay, it made a full recovery (with medical attention) within 48 hours. My mind still feels a bit like it's in free-fall mode though, sort of like it's falling out the bottom of my head, I don't really know what I'm feeling.

The good thing is, I have a myriad of professionals ready to step in and help me with all this. I just am not sure how to go forwards from here. With work, and study, and just day-to-day life. I'm doing the basics - eating, sleeping, smoking, cleaning - but that feels about all I can manage at the moment. I know I am still very low, to the point that just before I was exited from Tupu Ake (an acute alternative to hospital) I was once again considering suicide. But it doesn't work anyway, I have to live. It seems my body isn't giving a choice on that one.

I just would like some tips and advice for how to get my feet back under me again, and to help me feel less like my mind could drop out of my head at any given second.

If it's any help at all, I'm diagnosed with mood disorder due to a general medical condition (which seems to present as bipolar I), Borderline Personality Disorder, and executive functioning difficulties.

But yeah. I got home yesterday, and I need some help with returning to regular day-to-day life, and learning to think about the future like it's a real thing that's actually going to happen, and stuff like that.
   
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Re: Learning to live again. - November 10th 2012, 09:03 AM

It's good that you have the courage & strength to get help & still try. That means you are STRONG! I never got help when I was depressed, I was too ashamed of myself & I missed out on a lot because of it. You're doing all of the right things. Keep yourself busy! Try to keep yourself occupied & get out as much as possible. I found that if I'm alone at home that's generally when I start to feel alone. If that makes sense? Getting out & doing things you enjoy will help. I know you're not feeling your best right now, but you can overcome this. Believe in yourself, I have faith in you! Stay strong, Jess


When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.

   
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Re: Learning to live again. - November 10th 2012, 09:47 AM

Hey there,

Getting back on your feet is hard, but possible and doesn't require much. It's just the lack of opportunities which present themselves.
When I attempted, the day I got home, I was thrown headfirst into life, it won't work if you do that, you need to be a bit laidback and not worry as much. The next day I was staying with friends and relaxing, focusing on what I love (reading and writing). I slowly crept back into the real world, school, I stuck to the outskirts and focused more on what the teachers said than the students, the next thing I did was listen to what my friends did, listened to their advice and the help they offered, I nodded, smiled and told them not to worry but they did and I talked to them a bit. Then, I allowed myself to slowly do the things I did before the event and made myself not to feel burdened.

Keeping busy is a good thing, but also relaxing and taking "me" time.

Good luck,

Jay.

P.S feel free to message me if you ever need to.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
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When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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