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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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lost_in_life Offline
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Exclamation My last attempt at life - November 10th 2012, 04:31 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Have you ever had no one to talk to no one to turn to when things get bad or when you just can't keep going.....that's where im stuck right now. I'm unable to go in to the chat room thxs to my computer that is where I get most of my help now without it I'm lost..no one to talk to no one that cares its like I'm at a dead end and there's no way out I've lost all my friend thanks to my recent suicide attempts they just don't understand they all live perforce life's they don't know what it's like to be lost in your own fuck ups and to have nothing going right for them there biggest problems in life are not that they don't fit in or have no one to talk to its that they can't get there head out of there ass long enuff to give a shit about anyone else.I've been told by 3 different doctors and 2 mental hospitals thati have the worce depression they have ever seen. At this point in my life I'm totally lost no where to run no where to hide....my only hope is suicide, to stop the pain and suffering I feel for the things I've done/been through. I don't know where to turn or who to go to this is my last attempt at getting help....no one will help i guess that means i have no reason to live,not like i have a reason to live right now im just looking for one last hope befor this bottal of pills becomes my last meal....30 70mg vyvanse crushed down to take the time release out so it will all hit me like a shit ton of bricks and if someone finds me it will be to late.i want help but if i can find a reason to live then im gone,no family no friend i have no one.....some please help me....I'm available on Skype as well as yahoo messenger send me a message if u want to talk..



Lost_in_life

Last edited by lost_in_life; November 10th 2012 at 04:45 AM.
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: My last attempt at life - November 10th 2012, 05:14 AM

I care about you. I've talked to you a few times before and you're not alone. You can PM whenever you want. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.


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masks made by the sun.
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Re: My last attempt at life - November 10th 2012, 05:30 AM

I totally agree with the above poster. Suicide is not a good solution PM me and we could talk about this. Life is too precious to give up on. Things get better, it may not seem that way not but it will get better.. Have faith in yourself, you can overcome this obstacle.. Since you have both skype and yahoo messenger, you could send me a message on any of those too.




ďIíve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. Iíve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, Iíve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. Iíve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.Ē
- Michael Jordan


Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.
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Re: My last attempt at life - November 10th 2012, 10:33 AM

You actually made me cry, and trust me, crying does not come easily for me... It just struck so close to him. I felt exactly like this, I felt so lonely plus the depression and shit people heaped up on me rather than caring. but, life is worth it. Sure, people don't understand when their problems are quite miniscule in comparison. But, people struggle in different ways, people at different ages have more trouble understanding than certain others.
I reached out to a friend, she told me bullshit, get over it, that I have nothing to complain about. Even my therapist said I'm holding on to something that I shouldn't even though I have flashbacks of the stupid event... but, life is worth it, come talk with me. I have two good eyes, and I swift typing skill so can get back to you as soon as possible, plus insomnia so I can get on in the middle of the night some days if you require it please, stay strong, those pills should remain in your medicine cabinet and if you are taking them for anything, then take them in regular doses.. Don't go through with it!

Talk to others, don't rely solely on chat though, branch out into PM, and PM me. I'm here for you mate,

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
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My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: My last attempt at life - November 12th 2012, 05:27 PM

I have had depression myself and I can relate to this in a way. The feelings of pain are indescribable and there is just no light at the end of the tunnel. The negative feelings linger around you all the time and drives you mad, angry, sad, lethargic, hopeless, .... yes, I've been there. And I could give you so much advice, I could write everything I have done in my struggle. I have tried all possibilities and something must have worked. Today, I see depression as a state in which your body got stuck into. Some people are in a permanently peaceful state, without trying, and others are in a depressed state, also without asking for it. I have come to the conclusion that It must be due to a sadness that came too often and got set into a routine. And what I have tried is to push myself out of this routine. Push all negativity away.

- I have become a vegetarian, since I have read that one can actually consume and assimilate the sadness, anger and anxiety of the animals which were living in bad conditions. It is not backed by science, but I thought I might give it a try. And yes, it helps me lots.
- I have tried to stop negative thoughts by reciting mantras found on the internet/Youtube. Mantras for peace, purity. I liked Maha Mrityunjaya mantra. Mantras also do not have science approval, but they are backed by an ancient science. They claim to revert the vibrations of the body from negative(destructive) vibrations to positive. And it works, when I do it consistently.
- I have tried to back off from the dark side of life. From anything that is commonly associated with trouble, failure, etc.
- I try to practice compassion. I try to make myself aware that there are many people in need just like me, and I need not only to help myself but to help others.
- I also try to increase my awareness. I think about the world and the people and what is really going on. What is bad and what is good. What should be done and what not. Some conclusions are enough to make me socially deprived since I have understood that booze and long partying is pretty bad for your soul and happiness.
- Good things and good people are hard to find but they are worth looking for. Keep your eyes open for good things.

I still try to find way to keep myself on top of my feelings, but I have come a long way from where I was and I am pleased with the results I've got.

I apologize if any of my words or advice might have caused displeasure. I am writing in reply to your post because I care for your happiness and I hope that you will find the strength to get back on track.
   
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