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Unhappy What would happen if ? - January 3rd 2013, 12:00 AM

What would happen if I went to my GP, about depression, alone ?

So, long story short, my mum (and I'm sure older cousins, aunts, uncle, extended family), all have a strong stigma of depression. Mental illness' even !

But to be honest, the most important to me is my mum and sister.
My mum has a strong stigma on mental illness' because back where she grew up, they would make "jokes" about it, probably not intention to hurt people who actually suffer from it, but just to ridicule. But basically, the whole "community" have a stigma of mental illness' and have had for a long time. So parents have all taught their children and so on. So my mum probably wouldn't want to get a phone call from my doctor at my local GP saying I've come regarding depression and anxiety, she'd probably be furious and think I'm being selfish. Selfish because she has gone through a lot just to make sure me and my sister grow up and "normal" way, so for me to say I am depressed would be selfish or something. But she thinks its all about her. This time, its not ALL about her.

So I really need help, when I find the courage, I'm going to go to my GP, and ask the receptionist when the next avaliable slot is for my doctor. When I go to the appointment, he's going to ask me "so what's the problem" I'm then going to say, "I've been feel low and depressed for almost 8 months now" (I'm not just going to say "doc, I have depression" he's probably just going to think I'm one of those blunt teenagers who use the word "depressed" for every single silly thing/problem. So yeah, I don't know what else to expect. Any experiences ? (Uk)

Also, my mum probably thinks my depression will just go away, I think its cause she dosen't physically see how bad it is because she probably thinks down on mental illness'. So what I'm doing right now, is physically showing her and almost exaggerating the symptoms. She can see how I feel inside. I'm not going to to fake it, I'm just not going to pretend that I'm okay.

My mums anemic, and one of the symptoms is severe irritablity, so I guess that doesn't make it any easier on me ):

So anyway enough of my descriptions

1. What should I expect my doctor to say or do when I tell him about my problems ?

2. What would need to happen for my mum to be informed ?

3. What's the worst thing that could happen ?

Thanks (: any questions, just ask
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Re: What would happen if ? - January 3rd 2013, 12:16 AM

Even being in the UK, I'm not quite sure how it works with a GP.
In saying that, if you asked for strict confidentiality and got a promise of it (perhaps even written, if you're really worried) then I'm sure he'd respect that.
In general, with the counselling provided by the government - which you should be able to find information of at school, or your CAB, it has to be confidential with the only exception being if the counsellor has reasonable grounds to believe that the issue(s) discussed could cause serious harm to the patient or others. Only then will something be said, and it's likely to be only to the appropriate people, not necessarily to a parent.
So, you might like to have a look for counselling at school, as well as going to your GP.
I can't promise anything, but if you ask for confidentiality then hopefully you'll get some.

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Re: What would happen if ? - January 3rd 2013, 01:03 AM

Hello there,

Your thirteen, for doctors visits a parent MUST be with you.
If you get a referral to a therapist, your mother would want to know why. I think that you should just tell your mum, that's the best thing.

I go to a therapist and mum stole one of my appointments and I stormed out and screamed at her that I'm depressed and wanted to talk to hr about something and then ran away. Not a nice way to alert her, so I think you should sit her down, explain WHY you're depressed and then see if she can get you into seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist.

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Re: What would happen if ? - January 3rd 2013, 01:51 PM

Firstly, In England you do not need a parent to go to the doctors with you. When I was your age, i started seeing my GP for quite a while for my mental health. I never had to take my mum with me. I did a few times at one point but because I wanted to, not because I had to. The only time my doctor had to contact my mum when I was around your age, was when he decided to refer me to CAMHS for counselling (my mum had to give parental permission). I know my sister saw her GP for months on end and my mum never knew. The doctor didn't refer her to counselling at the time because he didn't think she was ready. As soon as she said she wanted it, he did it and spoke to our mum.

However, if your doctor feels you're at risk, he may talk to you about talking to your parents. Or he may contact someone else, such as the police or social services if they feel that is the best way around it.

When I first saw my doctor when I was your age, I had to do a "test" with my doctor. I would seem every few weeks just to have chats with him and he gave me a lot of support. I moved doctors and I see my new doctor weekly now and honestly, his support has saved me at times. They might ask you to do a test, they'll ask you questions such as how you feel, how long you have felt that way and so on. They may talk to you about referring you onto CAMHS too.

For the third one? Nothing. Nothing that bad can happen. The worst thing is it will be scary and at times you're going to just want to hide away and not talk, but the more you talk, the more people can help you, okay? It's okay to let people in, you deserve the help.

I hope everything is okay. Remember we're always here for you too

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