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Temperance Offline
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Angry I don't know if i can do this anymore - February 26th 2013, 04:54 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Lately it seems like nothing I do is ever good enough for anyone. My parents and I are constantly arguing about how i don't "do anything" around the house yet when i do something i get yelled at for not doing it a certain way, so I've given up. I'm also having a rough go lately at my job, getting treated like shit and yelled at for things that aren't even my fault.


Last night I relapsed and cut because I can't handle all of the stress anymore. things are getting to the point where if the stress doesn't let up within the next week or 2, I'm seriously considering ending the stress myself. I don't think I can handle any more, especially when to top it all off, my cousin died last week and i found out less than a month ago that I'm adopted and i don't even know who i am anymore.

I'm pretty sure I've almost hit rock bottom. I haven't even considered this for a few years and now I just want it all to stop piling up on me. I can't handle it all on my own...


~We're all misfits living in a world on fire~


Butterfly, don't fly away on me yet



   
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Re: I don't know if i can do this anymore - February 26th 2013, 05:21 AM

Hi, J.C! It's me, Christabel.

I'm sorry about all the things you're going through right now. Although, I can definitely relate to what you're feeling with your parents, because the same thing happens between me and my mom. She yells at me for not doing someone in a perfect way and if I don't do anything she yells at me for that. Have you told her it makes you feel sad when she does this? As for your work, can you get a different job with nicer people maybe?

I'm sorry you Self-Harmed again. But listen, you did great because you went awhile and was trying to stop. That's really good and a big step to recovery. You just have to remind yourself that relapses happen during recovery, you have to forgive yourself and try to begin again. Try to make it farther than the last time? I try to get past my last goal when I relapse. And I try to overcome the tiny feelings leading up to the biggest ones without Self-Harming. Because every little urge or feeling you sit out contributes to recovery. You begin to learn how to slowly cope without Self-Harm.

So sorry about your cousin, can't imagine how difficult it must be. Did they tell you who your biological parents are? I can see how that can be a pretty big thing to have put on you all at once.

Is there anyone you can confide in and talk to? Maybe tell your parents how you're feeling and that what they say makes you feel sad? Can you talk to friends or a therapist maybe?

How about getting out and doing something new and fun? A little distraction and get-away from all this stress? You deserve some fun.

I want you to know that you can PM/VM me anytime if you need someone to talk to. I may not always know what to say but I can try and I can definitely listen. This is the truth, things do get better. Remember that, because things won't always be so bad. Hope you feel better soon.

Take care,
Stay Strong <3
   
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Re: I don't know if i can do this anymore - February 26th 2013, 05:34 AM

I put out resumes every chance i can, and the mother thing... she stalked me for 5 years :s

my parents think I'm nuts and i can't afford a therapist :/


~We're all misfits living in a world on fire~


Butterfly, don't fly away on me yet



   
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Re: I don't know if i can do this anymore - February 26th 2013, 05:59 AM

Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe she just wants to get to know you?

I don't think you're nuts.
   
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