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IloveKason Offline
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Unhappy i have to do it - March 9th 2013, 01:55 AM

Im tired of being all alone in this... everyday i cry, i get bullied and i SH first it was bruising
now im thinking about ending it all, but i dont want to me and my family have been in a really tight spot every since the passing of my baby brother ive been trying to help my mom out with everything bills and her medicine for her diabetes no one in my family seems to care about us im only 16 i have a job but i don't make much my mom has one topretty soon we will be kicked out our home if we dont get next months rent im scared im saving as much as i can for us ive even made a donation page if we dont get the money soon i might hurt myself and i dont want to but if it will help i will.
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Re: i have to do it - March 9th 2013, 02:40 AM

I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I'm also sorry to hear that you have a big responsibility that no 16 year old should have like having to help with the bills and stuff. I can honestly tell you that hurting yourself will not help. It may seem like it will help but in the long run it just makes you feel guilty after you do it and it doesn't solve anything. I suggest you look up in the self-harm forum the alternative thread and try some of those to distract you when you want to harm yourself. I know killing yourself may seem like a good solution but it isn't think about your mom and how she will feel if you are gone. If you ever need to talk know I'm just a pm or vm away and I'm always willing to listen and help. I hope this helped a little.

We may shine, we may shatter,
We may be picking up the pieces here on after,
We are fragile, we are human,
We are shaped by the light we let through us,
We break fast, cause we are glass.
Cause we are glass.
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Re: i have to do it - March 9th 2013, 05:51 AM

Darling, breathe... You don't have to do it, it's a choice. And suicide isn't the answer no matter what's going on. Frankie makes a good point, think about how your mom would feel. Suicide is not fair, to you or everyone else. I know it's hard to see, but things get better.

I'm really sorry about your brother, the bills, the things you're going through. You're 16 and you definitely don't deserve to have to deal with the loss of a brother, and the stress of bills. I think it's great you're doing it though, you're a good person. And hopefully the donations site will help. Can you tell people at work about it?

Self-Harm is definitely not helpful though, it may bring relief but the scars are awful and it brings more negative feelings into the picture after doing it for awhile. Self-Harm can become addictive since it releases endorphins and it's a horrible cycle that's hard to break, trust me. Recovery is the best option and you have to wanna recover before you can. I suggest checking out the Self-Harm Alternatives list. Recovery's possible and worth it. Maybe you could try the Butterfly project?

I think it'd be good if you talked to someone about your feelings and thoughts. Your mom, your friends, relatives, co-workers or a therapist. Depression is so hard to deal with, especially alone. A support system could really help. Even a hotline during bad times. Talking to others about your feelings and opening up can be really difficult, I know. But to make it easier, you could write a note or text and give it to that person.

Doing something like listening to music, or taking a warm relaxing bath after work could really help you. Do little things that make you happy when you have extra time. Or go out, have a little fun, meet new people, go to the cinema. Get a cuddly pet, draw/paint, write your feelings in a journal, write poems, make prank calls. Go for walks, play sports, anything.

Imagine the end of all this? You get the bills paid, you could be happy. Work on your feelings, don't you want that? Don't you wanna see your mom happy? It's possible, it's a road with many bumps but a rainbow at the end. Don't give up, please. You're meant to live. You're here for a reason and you've got your whole future waiting for you, life away from home, dating, marriage, children. There's too much to miss out on in life. Suicide isn't worth it because there's always hope. Life has so much to offer. With all these difficult things we go through, we gain strength.

I'm here if you need someone to talk to.

Stay Strong <3
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Re: i have to do it - March 9th 2013, 02:57 PM

Thanks for the advice it really helped im trying to stop SH for they sake of my mom and 11 year old sister ive told everyone ik about the site but no one wants to help guess we will be put out soon but thats ok i guess and thanks it means alot.
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Re: i have to do it - March 10th 2013, 11:12 AM

You're welcome. That's good, you can do this. Keep hope, good things come up too. Don't give up.
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