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xxprincessxx Offline
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every damn time. - August 15th 2013, 12:51 AM

it's like this stupid cycle.
i convince all of my family, friends, my doctor, and myself that i am fine.
i feel fine. then once everyone isn't concerned about me....i get depressed again.
it makes no sense to me...why does this happen.
and i can't reach out because i literally was fine...like a few hours ago. but now i'm not.
i was afraid this would happen.

all i want is a place to call my own and
mend the hearts of everyone who feels alone,
you know to keep your hopes up high and your head down low.

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Re: every damn time. - August 15th 2013, 01:03 AM

Unfortunately depression usually goes in cycles like this. I got through it too although the periods of highs/lows seems to vary. If you ever need anyone to talk to about anything I'm usually around somewhere.
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Re: every damn time. - August 15th 2013, 05:33 AM

I haven't had a lot of experience with depression (though certain temporary events in my life have put me in some miserable lows, for sure). That said, could you tell the people in your support system that this happens, just so that they are aware that your depression is operating this way (if they aren't assuming that it is through prior knowledge and so on), and that way they know that you have frequent highs and lows? Being open about what's going on certainly can't hurt. Please let us know if you need some support or if you have questions about anything

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last updated on 11/11/17
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Re: every damn time. - August 15th 2013, 01:20 PM

From bits I've read of your posting in the past, I've noticed that you've often had ups and downs, is there anything specific that you think has caused your cycle to come around again? Also have you been diagnosed with anything specific? If you have, this is the likely cause of your constant cycles in mood. The problem with a person's mood is that it changes constantly, certain things in our life, even the smallest of things can be the things that affect us the most. Think back to the moment you felt your depression creeping up on you, was there anything happening during the time it started? Was there anything trivial that you think may have been the cause?

Like you I've had times where I'll say, "I'm fine" but the problem with this is actually because I'm not. I 'feel' fine, but really the problem is still there but from an underlying cause which I haven't really thought about or taken notice of. Have you thought about keeping a record of when your depression cycles start? Doing so can help you identify when your cycles started and when you feel they've truly ended, you can also keep track of certain events that have happened so that when you get another depression cycle, you can compare and see if there's a pattern into your cycles and/or whether a specific event is the cause.

Remember that you're a very strong person, you've come such a long way and you're doing really well! You might not believe it, but you are. You can get through this!

Life is for living, not for losing.
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