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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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darkdreamerxxx Offline
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Unhappy Falling Deeper - April 27th 2009, 07:11 PM

As some of you may know. I have told the college counselor that I am depressed adn am thinking of ending my life. which is good I guess edit i now see a doctar and a therapist and other people too,...................

I have always been an anxious mess, I get anxiety attacks a lot of the time. I cant go inot a dark room without the fear that a person or some superbnatural thing is going to hurt mer but I know it's not real, I know it's just the anxiety catching up with me after a stessful day.

I have the constant urge to hurt myself all the time. If someone annoys me, once they are out of the room I can't stiop myself from beating the *** out of myself, or if I am my room alone with the door locked I cut.

I don't know what to do anymore, I can't cope.
Nothing makes me smile these days, I got 98% in an exam this week and I didn't even care.

Today I left my class for a short break ( we are allowed)_ The assignemnt was stressing me ut so bad that I started crying bt thankfully the teacher didn't see me... i went outside and was spotted crying by my french teacher (miriam) who was very sweet to me, but I couldn't tell her whats wrong because she said it surprising to see me this sad because I usually very happy. i really wanted to tell the truth and tell her the happy me was just an act but I didn't. I didn'yt want to worry her

Sorry this is so long.......


PM me! I'm nice. Really! Don't believe what those faries say!!

Last edited by darkdreamerxxx; April 27th 2009 at 07:47 PM. Reason: to make it more clear and to add information
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Falling Deeper - April 27th 2009, 07:32 PM

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, the latter of this post i can really relate to, i think what you need to do is try to open up, by keeping all of this to yourself it's building up pressure making you want to hurt yourself even more,
are you going to see this counciller at a regular basis?
if you aren't i think you should go to your doctor, and see if they can refer you to a therapist, and then hopefully you'll be able to start to get better,
Take care!


Lauren

"The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember hope. We have hope."

"But in the ruins there is still a canvas. There is still beauty in your brokenness. The faded scars show healing reminding me that even though Iíve been in dark places, Iíve survived and learned and become stronger".




   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
darkdreamerxxx Offline
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Re: Falling Deeper - April 27th 2009, 07:38 PM

i have been made see a therapist months ago byby th college counselor and i still go,,,
when i told them both i was suicidal they took me to the doctor.

I don't wan to burden my swweet french teacher though


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Re: Falling Deeper - April 27th 2009, 07:40 PM

Im sorry you are having a hard time, like Lauren said, try to open up. Talk to some one you trust. Let them know how you are feeling. And maybe go to see a doctor, that will help a lot.

Hope things get better!


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Naomi. Offline
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Re: Falling Deeper - April 27th 2009, 08:18 PM

heyy
im here for you if you ever need to talk (:
i know we're talking right now but yeah (:
xox



Dream ♥

   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
darkdreamerxxx Offline
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Re: Falling Deeper - April 28th 2009, 04:34 PM

I really dont see the point in living these days, i'll stay alive of course, because I am still hoping it will get better although it feel doubtful that it will.


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