TeenHelp - Triggering: Falling into a depression?

TeenHelp (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/)

- Depression and Suicide (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f11-depression-suicide/)

- - Triggering: Falling into a depression? (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f11-depression-suicide/t127780-falling-into-depression/)

Falling into a depression?

First of all, this post is triggering. Everything I write is triggering. Beware!
Oh yeah, ill probably curse. So yeh kids, bad language! And drink hot chocolate and listen to your mum and have good grades and dont be a fuck up like me xD

Ok, so lately im in a bad mood for everything. I was in a bad mood for school since i was born, but when i play games im in a bad mood. When in out im in a bad mood. When im in school im in a bad mood. While i write this im in a bad mood. Basically, my current life is one big bad mood. :glare:
Im "out" of music, im in a bad mood to go to youtube to search for some. And before this becomes self-loathing and a whining post, ill just say that im a bad person and that im doing nothing to fix it. Why? Because im lazy, i dont want to. Why? Because im in a bad mood.
Its a fucked up circle of bad moods. Juck.

Soooo. Is this some kind of a depression or something? Ive been feeling like this for a few weeks. I have my good moments sometimes when im with my best friend smoking or something, but its become rare because i have things to attend to.
So, a retarded question.
How do i get out of this bad mood?
And im asking this because ill have my birthday soon and i dont want to be in a bad mood on by fucking birthday.
Oh yeah, im not like angry or stuffs, ive been supressing my anger for a long, loooong time as well as some other emotions. When i broke up with my ex, i realised it was a double edged sword. And blah blah blah... Anyways, i dont have much emotions, thats what my ex said to me as well, im just like emotionless. I can laugh and i be in a good mood from time to time, im just not sad or something... Its a difficult thing to explain...

At the beggining of this post i said i dont want to make a rant out of this post.
Shit. :glare:

Anyways, am i falling into a depression or something? I have SHed before...
Because i dont want a depression atm. Ill welcome it in a few months if you ask me, but i cant afford to be depressed at the moment...

Oh im a fucking idiot, hope you read throught my obvious rant... -.-
I need to start making shorter posts... :glare:

Re: Falling into a depression?

Hey there! I don't think your post was terribly long. I know you didn't want to sound whiny, but I'm glad you took the time to share your concerns with us!

There are so many factors to take into consideration for something like this, so you might want to start off by writing anything down that you think might even REMOTELY contribute to your "bad mood." For example, a conflict with a parent, friend, ex-girlfriend, etc. could have an effect on your mood. Smoking, ingesting, injecting, and inhaling mood-altering substances could have an effect on your mood (nicotine is a stimulant, so that would count). Write down anything that comes to mind, even if it seems highly unlikely that it could have an effect on your mood. Perhaps it's not just one big issue, but several small issues, that are having a cumulative effect on your mood.

There's no harm in meeting with your GP/regular physician/doctor in order to rule out general medication conditions, such as hormonal imbalances, that could have an effect on your mood. While you're there, you can also ask for a referral to a mental health professional. Given your age and the relatively short period of time for these symptoms, I doubt you'll be labeled with a chronic/pervasive mental illness right off the bat; however, you can begin the evaluation/assessment process and learn how to cope with the "bad mood."