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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Never Forget Hope
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Unhappy This Should be the Best Week of my Life - May 28th 2015, 12:01 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I'm marrying the love of my life next week. And yet, I'm struggling so hard right now. I can't tell anyone, because...well, it's awful!

I love him and am glad to be marrying him. However, over half the people invited declined and the ones who were supposed to come waited until this last week to let me know they aren't. My best friend is probably not coming. My really close friend is not coming. Another really close friend isn't. And my aunt and uncle are not. As of today.

We're both just upset with how our beautiful wedding is turning out. We wanted to do a wedding for other people. We shouldn't have. We're not in debt due to the wedding and hardly anyone will be there.

I'm feeling really insignificant and really stressed. I'm really grouchy and feel miserable. And I feel worse for feeling this way when it's supposed to be a good thing. But we both agree nothing is changing after our wedding and we all ready are married in our minds. And we had to cancel our honeymoon due to fiance losing his job. So...we have nothing to look forward to. We have each other, yes. But nothing is changing between us.

And our vacation isn't happening. Now we just get to stress about the wedding payments instead of buying a house.

It's just awful and I really want to cut.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: This Should be the Best Week of my Life - May 28th 2015, 12:27 AM

Wow Kelly that's truly an awful situation to be in. Wedding is a big deal and it must be difficult to have people you're close with cancel last minute.
I'm wondering if you could possibly make the wedding smaller or is it too far in as of now? Maybe you can find a way to reduce the costs
Please remember that cutting will not solve this. It won't make the people you've invited decide to show up. It will only hurt you in the long run and you absolutely don't deserve that. You're strong and capable of dealing with this without resorting to hurting yourself. Also, you've done nothing wrong. Them not showing up could be for a thousand different reasons that you have no control over. It isn't your fault. If they're close, chances are they care but really couldn't make it. You deserve a great wedding and now that you have all these problems come up the best thing to do is give it your best shot.

I really hope things start shaping up soon. But if not, that's a challenge you can get through. It is okay to feel sad and frustrated over something like this. I imagine I would too. But these things are unforseen circumstances and you did what you can to set up a wedding.
You're so much more worth then self harm, don't let this get you down. TH is here, behind you and feel free to continue to update or rant or whatever.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Never Forget Hope
I can't get enough
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Name: Kelly
Age: 29
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Location: Charleston, SC

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Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: This Should be the Best Week of my Life - May 28th 2015, 12:32 AM

I don't think I'm going to cut, or self harm. I'm just having the urges.

And it's too far in to change anything. If they told me last week, we could have. But not this week. So we're paying for a lot of people to be there and they won't be there. We wanted a small wedding anyway. Invited about 60 people, expected 40. We're getting 24. So it's a pretty big blow.

I was recently diagnosed bipolar so we're still adjusting my meds ands just switched off a med yesterday so my moods are really awful right now. should be better for the wedding, but just so awful right now.

Thank you for your reply.
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Re: This Should be the Best Week of my Life - May 28th 2015, 04:28 PM

I'm very sorry you are feeling so down about your special day. But you said yourself - you have each other. That is nothing to downplay, even if nothing is really changing between you and your fiance.

I realize it's hurtful, but the two of you should remember that it is your day and try to enjoy it as best you both can with the people who are there. Take care and congratulations to the two of you.
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: This Should be the Best Week of my Life - June 3rd 2015, 10:01 PM

Hi there, Kelly!

I'm really sorry about all of this, I can completely understand why you feel so upset about all of this. It sounds like such awful circumstances around your wedding day when it should be an amazing experience for you and your future husband. If those people weren't coming to the wedding, it would have been kind if they had given you at least a bit more notice. When you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and you spend so much time and money on making the wedding day perfect to be able to remember and cherish it fully, I can imagine that it really hurts when things don't go as planned. No need to feel ashamed, many would feel upset by this.

You posted this around a week ago so I'm not sure if you've gotten married yet. However, I just wanted to say congratulations. I know that things haven't worked out very happily regarding the wedding plans and I'm sorry they haven't, and I understand how not having your closest friends there could be really upsetting, but I really hope you still end up having a lovely wedding day. You deserve to be happy on your wedding day so I hope it still does turn out to be a good day and you feel happy being able to finally marry your love.

Hope this helped a little, wish I could offer some sort of advice. If you'd like, you can message me if you want to talk more about this. I don't mind listening if you need to vent! In the meantime, stay strong.

Last edited by DeletedAccount11; June 3rd 2015 at 10:57 PM.
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Jeez, get a life!
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Re: This Should be the Best Week of my Life - June 3rd 2015, 10:46 PM

I am really sorry that one of the best times in your life has turned out this way. I know it must be really hard to feel like this when you're meant to be feeling great because you have such a big event coming up but its understandable why you are feeling this way and we get that and there's nothing to be ashamed about. I'm assuming you're married now and I hope it went as perfect as it could do and actually just getting married was enough for you both and that you both enjoyed your day because you really deserved too.

I hope you have stayed safe too. Remember the alternatives and remember that we're here for you so don't be alone if you are struggling with the urges to self harm, okay? But keep fighting and keep your head high. You've married the love of your life and that's something to be happy about. I really hope you are feeling a bit better and I'm sending you my love.

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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