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fight.for.it Offline
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Unhappy making aomeone understand - October 5th 2015, 10:13 PM

Hi, I told someone about how I was abit down but it didnt help really. I want to tell him more and show how bad things are with me (self har/suicidal thoughts) but I dont want him to think im am making a big deal over nothing. From the outside my life doesnt look bad at all really, and its not (compared to others), but I just cant see the point in anything and im sick of everything. I also dont want anyone else to find out because I know what people would think cause I have done the same before. In the past I heard girls were self harming and I just thought,' they are jsut doing it for attention, their lives arent that bad'. I wouldnt think that now cause once you have been in the same position you understand.I just dont want other people thinking the same thing I thought. How can I make my teacher understand why I am depressed eithout sounding super suicidal.
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Re: making aomeone understand - October 5th 2015, 11:41 PM

First off, can I just say that you're doing really great by opening up to your teacher? It takes a lot to talk about such sensitive issues so you're obviously quite courageous and should be proud of yourself for this. Opening up is a big step towards recovery and I want to encourage you to continue letting people in.

You asked about how to tell your teacher you are depressed without sounding suicidal - are you actively suicidal? If you aren't actively planning on attempting then I think you should clarify that to your teacher. Tell him how you feel depressed and have suicidal thoughts but you aren't planning on acting on them (if you honestly are not.)

When you haven't experienced particular issues nor been exposed to others struggling with those issues on a personal level, it can be difficult to understand. I see how and why you didn't understand before. Being educated on issues can be helpful in a lot of ways although, I'm truly sorry you now understand due to your own experience. A positive can still come out of this - compassion and understanding for others and finding strength to get through this personally and maybe even inspire others who may be going through the same things. You can do this, you can get through this. Now as for your worry, I highly doubt your teacher will think that you're simply doing this for attention. I'm sure he understands that no matter how great a person's life looks from the outside, it is still possible to have emotional struggles and issues in their life. He probably has had a few students come to him or he has caught on to their depression/self-harm issues. Sadly these issues are all too common. I imagine that being a teacher he has seen this therefore he'd be more understanding and compassionate than you may expect. Simply explain how you feel from your viewpoint to help him understand as if he were in your shoes. The fact that you're reaching out to someone is wonderful, it really is and I hope you continue to do so and I also hope you reach out for additional help in the future such as therapy.

I wish you the best of luck. We're here if you need support. Stay strong and keep holding on, okay? You can do this.

Last edited by DeletedAccount11; October 5th 2015 at 11:45 PM. Reason: Typo.
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Re: making aomeone understand - October 6th 2015, 05:09 PM

I get the feeling that you need to change how you're looking at the situation, because it's only from looking at how it can be better, working to make it better and recognizing the fact that there is still some good to glean from it, some positives to take from the situation, can we truly grow. There's no point overthinking things because the situation is how it is because that's how it was built up to be.

However, the manner in which you look at it and take it is entirely up to you. I'm sure that with enough time, you'll be able to change your point of view to one that's more positive and happier.

Only then you can overcome this . and i know you can beat this. Stay strong! We'll always be around

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You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
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Re: making aomeone understand - October 8th 2015, 02:01 PM

Hi there

Firstly, I am sorry that you are going through all of this right now but also really glad that you are reaching out to people around you for help. Thats a brilliant step to take and something you should be proud of yourself for!

I can understand why you never understood the girls situation before and that's okay I think. Sometimes we don't understand something unless we have bee through it ourselves and sometimes thats just life. But like Ellie said, something good can come out of this! For sure. And maybe that's going to lead you on to a different and better life.

I think it's great you are wanting to talk to your teacher and I think you are brave for doing so. I highly doubt your teacher will think you are doing all of this for attention. That's not what they are their to think. They aren't there to judge you okay? They are there to help. They are teachers because they care about young people like yourself and want to be able to help you, not judge you. Talk to them as much as you can and let them in because letting them in and letting them help you might make a really big difference and change to your life. I know when I let my teachers in it helped dramatically. Having that support was really helpful and recently I moved to university and today I spoke to my lecturer and that really helped so I am constantly encouraging people like you, to reach out to people in their education, as scary as it may be.

I think you could ask them when they are free to meet up with them somewhere within the school and then talk to them verbally and explain the situation and how you are feeling and whats going on for you right now or you could even print this off or write it all down yourself so you can be really honest with them and let them know what is happening for them to help you as much as they can. I know being honest can be hard because talking about this kind of thing can be scary but I know you can do this so believe in yourself!

And remember that things will get better for you. Its not going to be this way forever and you can get through it. If you ever need anything, we're here for you so please reach out to us or feel free to shoot me a pm any time. You're never alone and I never want you to feel alone neither. We're right behind you on this, okay?

Take good care and reach out!

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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