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HELLO?? - October 12th 2015, 05:35 AM

My depression is getting worse and worse and I have no fucking clue how to make it better. My therapist says I need to start getting out of the house and that will make me feel better. HELLO? does she not understand that just makes me anxious and hate myself even more. All I do is compare my body with other people...sit and think on how FAT I am. I highly doubt that this treatment center will take me so I have to look for another one...But I doubt we can afford any. Today sucks big time all I want to do is B/P and Cut. UGH can someone help me?


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Re: HELLO?? - October 12th 2015, 08:31 AM

I'm sorry you're going through this I don't really know what to say to help, because I've never been properly depressed... if I were you I would listen to your therapist and try going out, maybe somewhere where there are less people. You'll probably find that the more you force yourself to go out, the more enjoyable it will get. Personally having a routine, like school, makes me feel closed up and depressed and I just want to go home and be on my computer and not bother to make myself a proper meal, and I've found that the one thing which helps me to not fall into this pit is to force myself to go out into town at least once a week, even if it's just to sit in the park and read a book or watch the sunset.

I really hope you get through this!

Skye


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Re: HELLO?? - October 12th 2015, 08:50 AM

Hello frankie i think when it comes to the body, it's not something to worry about. The personality matters more, and i'm pretty sure you're a sweet person with a lot of niceness and a big heart .

and i think thats what truly matters. Nothing matters more in my book than being someone who's nice , understanding and won't take other people for granted. Something tells me you're someone like that and you should give yourself a pat on the back - you're someone whom a lot of people would like to be.

Be proud of yourself.. you're VERY, very much better than you think you are. I'm here for you to rant to and talk to anytime, anyday


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You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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Re: HELLO?? - October 12th 2015, 11:56 PM

Hi, Frankie.

What you're dealing with in the first place sounds difficult all on its own but then to feel as if your therapist isn't listening to you must be even more frustrating. However, I do agree with your therapist. When you're having a hard time doing something such as getting out of the house, you're going to not want to do that obviously because that just feels easier. The thing is, it will be much harder and much worse on you at times when you have to get out of the house to run necessary errands.

I understand going out makes you feel anxious so I can see why you're hesitant to do so and feel as that'll only make you feel worse. It might but only at first. A good way to overcome what scares you and what makes you anxious is to ease out of your comfort zone little by little. Skye has a good suggestion about going to a place without lots of people first, then go from there. I know it might feel impossible but eventually I believe it will become more and more natural. How about asking your therapist for ideas on how to cope with being out in the public? Explain to her how getting out of the house feels to you and hopefully she could offer ideas that would be helpful.

Comparing yourself to others can be really upsetting and become a habit which makes it really difficult to simply not do. Most people compare themselves to others when they see physical/personality features that they wish they had. Most of them don't realize others probably do the exact same thing with them. You may not think about it but people in public most likely have done the same thing to you; noticed something about you that makes you unique and pretty that they wish they had also. Everyone is different in all different sorts of ways. Everyone is unique and they have their strengths and flaws. Embrace the strengths and do whatever you can to try and accept your flaws. Everyone has them but flaws don't define a person. You still have a lot of great things too and it can be so easy for each individual to lose sight of what makes them great regardless of flaws. Perhaps it would help to keep all of that in mind and practice diverting your thoughts in public? Such as thinking about other things instead. Focus on running your errand, focus on thoughts that make you happy and do your best to think about other things even something as simple as chewing gum and focusing on the taste.

Remember that who you are as a person matters a lot more than your body. This goes for everyone. No matter how "beautiful" a person is on the outside, if they treat everyone horribly then that doesn't really make them a person you'd want to be with or befriend. Plus, beauty has unrealistic standards especially these days. Build yourself up as a person. Be kind and set moral values and goals for yourself. Right now it may not seem like it especially while you are dealing with depression and an eating disorder, but I imagine setting values you can fall back onto when you don't feel beautiful will mean a lot to you. Be who you want to be as a person, you know? No one can take that away. Plus, I am sure you are already a person who cares a lot about others. You've been a nice person to me.

Hope this made some sort of sense and helped a bit, Frankie. Take care and stay strong. You can do this.
   
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