holiday season and depression :(

Well its that time of year again and my depression is already acting up. I'm having a hard time getting out of bed, but what's worse is leaving the house. Its not because of the weather, I like the cold and the weather here has been prettyholidays What bothers me when I leave the house is the constant reminder of how lonely I am. Seeing it will either anger and almost make me cry because I have no one in my life. I can't change it either because those Damn dating sites are useless. I spend almost every night getting drunk and medicating myself to sleep.

These holidays really piss me off. I don't like seeing or being reminded of how miserable my life is, especially when my "family" gets to have a good time. im so sick and tired of this life i have to live, so fucking sick of these fucking holidays.

[rac146]

I get really stressed/depressed this time of year as well. What used to be a lovely time is forever scarred by the fact that my family no longer talks to me.

I got lots of extra hours at work to help keep me busy. I know that once the holidays are over I'll feel at least a little bit better.

is there anything you can do to keep yourself busy? even if its just reading, I find staying busy helps

Hey, Ryan, I am sorry the holidays is such a rough time of the year for you. I understand you want nothing to do with your family, but what about your friends? Do you think you could spend some time with them? I'm not saying you should barge in on their holiday celebrations, but ask them if they would like to hang out when they have free time, do something fun. Go see a movie, get pizza and bowl, or something to get your mind off the negativity.

You can do things by yourself as well, such as reading, watching movies on Netflix, playing video games. Catch up with an old friend on Facebook or Skype, I'm sure there is someone out there who won't be celebrating the holidays, just like you. Don't be afraid to reach out!

[Green Yoshi]

Hello Ryan..

I think it'll be good if like i said before.... get into some sort of activity where you mingle around.. friends are everywhere, and there's someone for everyone. There's plenty of reasons to be happy, and there's no point thinking about what's happened... you can make new friends, you can socialize and no one's going to stop you. You deserve so much happiness and I want to see you get that happiness

You'll always have us on your side . Always.

Also, perhaps it might be time to have a heart-to-heart with your family.. I know that you aren't really on good terms with them, but at least you could try clearing those doubts and misunderstandings out .. Most of all, just remember. You so deserve to be happy, and nothing should stop you

We'll always be here for you to rant to... We ain't leaving anytime. I got your back Ryan!

Hey, Ryan.

Christmas time is a wonderful time, but it must be really hard not having family to spend it with. I'm sorry to hear this, Ryan. I'm glad you opened up here, though, because you've got friends here and we're here to remind you that you aren't alone and that we do care. I'll surely be around to wish you a Merry Christmas!

Is there any family members whom you could make a "peace offering" with? Christmas can be a time of bonding and forgiveness. I was wondering if there's any family members that treat you decently that you could develop a healthier, closer relationship with? You could reach out by visiting and giving a gift. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something small but thoughtful. Even a simple Christmas card explaining you miss that person and would like to spend time with them again. I'm not sure if those options are possible, or if there's any family members you could resolve issues with, but I really do hope so.

I can't imagine how hard it must be to spend Christmas alone. I can see why it would make you feel depressed. I think it'd make the majority of people feel depressed. Would it be possible for you to find another way to celebrate? You deserve to be able to enjoy Christmas as well. How about volunteering? Usually there are volunteer options around Christmas Eve/Christmas day, such as a soup kitchen for instance. That way you'd be able to give to others, while being around others and socializing. You don't have to be alone and you shouldn't be alone on Christmas.

I can understand how everything you go through would make you turn to alcohol as a way to escape and cope with how you feel. But I do think that doing your best to stay sober will benefit you more than alcohol does. I remember when you posted a thread about how you'd been free from alcohol for awhile and you were feeling a lot better both emotionally and physically. I was happy to hear that, and I know you can do it again, you know? Take it one day at a time and slowly depend less on alcohol. You deserve to spend Christmas free from alcohol, because you should be able to feel good and healthy.

Despite all the difficulties, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas, Ryan. Take care and hold on.