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Exclamation Past issue, I need help!!!!! - June 21st 2016, 04:46 PM

I posted this a while ago, i know its stupid but its actually an issue and makes me very depressed i dont really understand as you may not understand me. trust me I know it sound dumb but im not joking. Just looking for support and kind comments to make me feel better

this is what it said on my last post:

`So theres this new thing which some bullies have started to do and im one of the people who are made to look stupid in this, like when your just walking in the corridor they just walk by me and say im ugly then their friends say yeah, hes ugly. and it makes a real scene and people turn around and look and it makes me feel uncomfortable and i feel really depressed over this...`
   
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Re: Past issue, I need help!!!!! - June 22nd 2016, 04:15 PM

Hey there,
I don't think this is stupid at all. I recall the same thing happening to me when I was in school. I was one of the students at school walking through the hallway and there would be alot of laughing, pointing, giggling, whispering etc and being talked to in third person "she's so ugly" etc and it felt so horrible, even worse if I started crying. It is understandable that this would make you feel bad. They're singling you out and making fun of you, whether you really were "ugly" (which is already a complicated word) or not, is irrelevant because you're still human and deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.

Is it possible you can walk to classes with a friend? If you're having a good conversation with someone, students are less likely to make fun of you but even if they still do-it may not hurt as much because you'd have someone supportive next to you.

When people bully others, it's says more about them than the people they bully. It doesn't make it any less stressful to be on the receiving end but it may help to take it with a grain of salt. Although, salt does hurt. It burns wounds. We can only try to heal from these wounds.

I recently spoke to someone, I was telling her and a few others that I used to be bullied. She then opened up about how she was a bully once herself but since then had learned to cope with stress in better ways. That doesn't make it any less wrong, but it may help to keep in mind that it is very likely these people bullying you-have learned these behaviors, and they've learned it from someone, somewhere. Should they choose to do so, perhaps in years from now, they can work to unlearn these behaviors and learn healthier ways to deal with what they're going through.

They're putting others down to gain a better sense of themself-to feel better about themself. Then the question is raised-why would they need to feel better about themself? and one can speculate that this is their way of coping with stress based on what they know. Obviously each situation is different but maybe this helps puts things in perspective-not to excuse it but to keep in mind that there are layers behind the making fun of someone...things that are not your fault and dont have to do with you as much as their unhealthy coping mechanisms. They do not see the pain they create for others. Or in some cases they DO see how they affect others but it has become a habit of sorts to resort to doing what they're familiar with doing. It takes courage to try something new but that's their choice.

Have you brought this to the attention of a teacher or guidance counselor at all? Is that something you may be interested in doing?

Hang in there
   
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