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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Name: 3mily
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Question How to tell them... or anyone really. - October 15th 2016, 04:29 AM

I litterally just posted a thread in self harm, concerning myover wheleming urge to cut. But, i feel like theres a weight around my neck, it gets worse by the minute. I know I need to tell someone, but I don't want to tell my family. I don't want to tell my best friend because it throws him into hysteria and he worries so much about losing me, I can't stand seeing him like that. And I dont know my councilers number. What should I do? How do I tell my parents about this? They aren't excatly the understanding or patient type. I'm afraid they'll put me back in the mental hospital. I just got out. I don't want to go back. Please, someone tell me what I should do. Who should I go to if I do this? I know I shouldn't hold it to myself because at this point I'm afraid of hitting something deep again. Please help. Thank you.



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Re: How to tell them... or anyone really. - October 16th 2016, 07:03 PM

Hi,

I'm sorry you haven't gotten a reply yet. I also looked over your other thread in the self harm forum, and I think you got a lot of great advice there to help with the urge to cut. I hope that maybe some of those will help your urge to cut, and sometimes they can help with the thoughts of hopelessness and depression.

You're right that you should probably talk to someone. I know it's hard, especially if you don't really want to go back to the hospital. But the longer you let it go without letting others in the worse it is going to get. You cannot do this alone. I also think that by opening it up it shows that you're strong and can beat this. Because talking to others is hard. It shows so much humility and vulnerability. That's not a bad thing at all.

I'm sorry you don't have your counselors phone number - do you perhaps have an email? I don't have mine's number either, so when I'm really struggling I sit down and write her an email. It helps me get the feelings out and put it all down so I don't forget when I do get the chance to talk to her. It might help you too.

You can also call or text a hotline. A lot of them are available 24/7 and they're trained to help take you from a hot moment to a cool one and kind of calm you down. Does that make sense? It's a good thing to use when you're feeling like this and can't get hold of your counselor. Here's our list Here.

One that I use a lot is the text hotline. I find it easier than talking to them with my voice because it just makes you uncomfortable and it's a little easier to get out the words.

You are not alone. If you ever need anything, my inbox is always open as well!


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Re: How to tell them... or anyone really. - October 18th 2016, 01:55 AM

Hi 3mily. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I went through the same thing, my best friend also got upset whenever I talked about it so I also stopped talking about it. It only got worse when I didn't talk to anyone. I think this site can be your refuge as it was for me. Sometimes those around us love us so much they can't bear seeing us in pain. I think becoming friends with people on this site can help, since most of us have been through something similar we are able to help with more understanding and patience.

I think you should try to contact your counselor, if you don't want to tell your parents then telling them will probably make it worse for you, especially with the hospital. Trust your own instincts when it comes to this.

I also want to let you know that you can PM me anytime you need too. I am on this site a lot and I usually leave it open during the day and late into the night. I've gone through similar things... So, if you need to talk and you don't want to talk to your best friend or your counselor I will do my best to be here for you. I can't promise I'll have answers, but I can listen.


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Re: How to tell them... or anyone really. - October 21st 2016, 06:03 PM

Hello again

I think it is really great you're wanting to talk to someone about all of this. Have you yet done this? I'll still go ahead and give you what I think would be good in case you haven't of you feel you didn't say enough (I know you have seen your doctor but not sure if that was before or after this thread was made).

A good point was made by asking you whether you have your counselors email address or even their name? You might be able to find them online. I know my private counselor is online because that is how I found her and started seeing her. It just might be a good way to find her contact information.

But we are always here for you so feel free to talk to us. Telling your parents is great but if I remember correctly your dad doesn't have a great response to all this. Could you maybe talk to a teacher or a school counselor or nurse or even the doctor you have seen? And if you ever feel like you are at serious risk or harm to yourself, you can contact a helpline, call emergency services or go to your local A&E department/ER. Don't let things get out of control.

I know in England (from experience) it is really hard to have someone admit you in to a psych ward but I know from being on here it's pretty easy for someone to admit you into one in America and if I am right you are in America (?). Maybe talk to the people you involve in this and share your concerns about ending up back in hospital and why you feel it wouldn't be very beneficial for you etc.

Keep on going and keep fighting. And if you struggle to talk verbally about it all you can always write someone you trust as mentioned above, a letter. Just don't go through this alone.

Hope and wishes.
Jessie


"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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