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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Unicorn. Offline
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Helping a sucidal friend? - May 22nd 2009, 09:22 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I seriously don't know what to do anymore.
And it's not one, it's two of my closest friends.
Feel free to move this around anywhere, I wasnt going to post it but, yeh, im completly in over my depth.

Okay. I've known both of them were depressed, seriously for a long time. I've tried helping, tried backing off, tried everything.
Neither of them want to come on TH, so that option's out.

There's an msn convo I want to post, I got emailed it by (M) last night, edited out alot of the triggering parts. It's still quite triggering though, so please, stop reading if you dont want to x

M
i'll probs just take an overdose of summat...yano the painless easy way...as long as it tastes good...

A ok
i'll probably slit my wrists then. whilst i cry myself to death because i couldnt save my best frined

M
dont say that

A
why not?
if your saying it why cant i?
because it sounds so bad
because it HURTS

M
my way didnt sound as bad

A
but your doing the same to me right now
well maybe your resons arent to get revenge on yourlself

M
its ok i suure you'll get over me... just say i went away

A
i'd love to kill myself, get my own back for not being good enuff but you.
i cant cant lie to myself M
you know i cant
you know i'd never get over you
if you kill youself you kill me
remember that

M
you dont mean it

A
i do
...

Ack. I read this and just cried my eyes out. Any advice would do. What do I say, What do I do!? I just don't know anymore. There's more as well, it gets worse. Neither of them want to talk to anyone, they dont WANT help.
Sorry, I'm not making any sense, I'm just so scared.

Jess x


~Jess x
17|10|09

Whenever your world starts crashing down
That's where you'll find me

Last edited by Unicorn.; May 23rd 2009 at 08:25 PM. Reason: Spelling >.<
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Helping a sucidal friend? - May 22nd 2009, 09:44 PM

Hey Jess.

I'm sorry that you have to deal with this right now, it's really hard. You've been so caring to post this and to seek help for both of them, so well done. You should be proud of yourself.

It seems as though both of your friends are in a distressing state right now and that must be hard for you to deal with. If both of them are contemplating suicide, it is crucial that someone knows about this. It's not something that you can deal with by yourself, depression is a serious illness which ideally needs some professional help.

As long as you've reassured them and offered them support, there isn't much more that you can personally do, Jess. You're doing so much already.

Your friends have to be willing to be helped and want help in order to actually be helped. I'm sorry that it doesn't seem as though your friends are willing to take this help, but with some encouragement they may be able to be persuaded. It is a hard thing to do, but if you think that they're actually going to harm themselves, you could think about informing someone, such as a teacher or a school counsellor. This may be hard for you and your friends, but if it prevents them coming to any harm, it is most definitely worth it.

Talking to a school counsellor may be beneficial to you yourself also, as this is understandably a hard situation to be in and you seem to be getting distressed, which i'm not suprised about. You need to make sure you're looking after yourself too, okay, Jess?
   
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Re: Helping a sucidal friend? - May 23rd 2009, 02:16 PM

It's a good thing you're confronting your confusion and asking for help. No wonder you're scared, these people are your close friends and they're hurting. Which, hurts you. The important thing in this situation is to keep yourself grounded and calm. It's amazing you're there for them, but don't let it build up too high. You need to consider your well being too.

From the MSN conversation you posed, it looks to me like they're very apathetic towards life. Try to be positive and let them know you care. Extra reminders are always helpful during the darker time. Remind them about how much you care. Use your emotions and experiences with them. Show them how bad you would feel if they left. Try and be there as much as you can for them. However, I agree, maybe suggesting a counselor would help. Depression is a serious condition and sometimes it needs to be professionally treated. I'm assuming your friends are around your age [13]. That is way too young to throw their valuable lives away. If things get to the point where they are too close to committing suicide, I really suggest talking to their parents or calling the police if they attempt. I realize it might seem like a betrayal, but their lives are important. Having them gone would hurt much more than them being angry.

You're a wonderful friend and you have a difficult thing to think about. Take your time and contemplate all your options. You don't need to choose until you're ready. Make sure to take care of yourself too, okay? If you need help, don't be shy to ask for it because you don't want things building up. Take care.

~Stay strong and have faith.


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Re: Helping a sucidal friend? - May 24th 2009, 02:33 AM

first let them know you care about them.
second give them these numbers or just call them and see what they have to say:
teen suicide hotline24/7 1800-suicide
they can help you i have recomended many other people to this and they all say it helped.

also try this hotline
teencrisisline:1800-448-4663.
maybe this number to
GENERAL CRISIS COUNCILEING:1-800-785-8111

hope this helps
NOTE:ALL HOTLINE SERVICES ARE 100% FREE TO GENERAL PUBLIC


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