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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Pandemonium Offline
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I'm getting so sad again - May 23rd 2009, 04:33 PM

So tired, yet I can't sleep. Never cry, but hurt so much inside. So bored, but I can't concentrate on anything. The only things I've felt lately is sad, agitated/anxious or numb. I'm self harming at least every second day and suicide is looking very pleasant right now. I know how I'd go. It's be quick. no one would find me. i'd die. nothingness. forever.

it's so hard to fight.

i always end up here. always. i was like this 2 yrs ago, ended up in hosp. for a month. got meds and counselling. still getting counselling. but here i am again. nothings working. so sad.

i find it so hard to believe my friends when they say they care about me. i just don't believe them. everythings just falling apart right now and i can't get release anywhere.

exams in a few weeks too.
   
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Re: I'm getting so sad again - May 23rd 2009, 05:33 PM

Hi


So tired, yet I can't sleep. Never cry, but hurt so much inside. So bored, but I can't concentrate on anything. The only things I've felt lately is sad, agitated/anxious or numb. I'm self harming at least every second day and suicide is looking very pleasant right now. I know how I'd go. It's be quick. no one would find me. i'd die. nothingness. forever.

You sound like you are suffering from stress as well being sad. It must be horrid to feel how you are feeling. But suicide is not the answer, it may look good, but when you get better you will be thankfull you didnt end it. Suicide wont be quick & people would find you. Theyd miss you aswell. It might be nothingness for you, but to those who care, it will scar them forever.


it's so hard to fight.

It will be hard to fight. Nothing is easy when it comes to mental health. If things were easy then there wouldnt be any mental health problems.
What makes things easier is if any negative problems write them down. Then find a positive answer to it.

Example: Negative; I feel sad
Positive; I wont feel sad forever



i always end up here. always. i was like this 2 yrs ago, ended up in hosp. for a month. got meds and counselling. still getting counselling. but here i am again. nothings working. so sad.

I assume ending up here means the current situation you are in. Just becase you were like this 2 years ago, doesnt mean you have to follow that route again. Things can change. You dont have to worry about what happened last time...because you cant change the past, just look to the future instead.


i find it so hard to believe my friends when they say they care about me. i just don't believe them. everythings just falling apart right now and i can't get release anywhere.

You probably find it hard to belive your friends when they tell you they care about you. Im so sorry you feel that way. I know its difficult to listen to what people say & its even harder to trust. But if everything is falling apart, you really need to trust your friends, no matter how hard that is. You can do it.

exams in a few weeks too.

This is probably the main reason of why you are getting tired, cant concentrate & just generally are going downhill again. Exams are stressful for everyone, but because you have mental health problems is that much harder. I know, I went through it & I promise you after the exams you will feel so much better. Exams/revising/study leave is the worst part of school & can bring anyone down, so down worry, your not the only person to have the same thoughts you are having.

I wish you all the best.
Please dont end your life....it will get better.

Talk to me or your counsellor, or anybody, just keep safe,

Jamie
xx


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Re: I'm getting so sad again - May 23rd 2009, 06:24 PM

Hey,

I know that it's hard for you. Feeling sad all of the time sucks, but please don't kill yourself. Believe me when I say things get better, not all at once but things change over time even if they don't feel like they are changing.

You say you're still in counselling, tell your counselor that you are self-harming and that you feel suicidal and that you think you may act up on it. It's hard to believe that people care about you but I'm sure your friends really do mean it, I used to believe that my friends didn't care either but I realized they wouldn't stick by my side and tell me that they care if they really didn't. So believe them and let them care about you. It's nice having people there.

Keep Holding On.
I'm here if you would like to talk.
Just a PM away <3


when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
   
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